Thoughts of a Common Man

I always think of the last few lines of “This Hard Land” by Springsteen when I reach the end of a new year and think about the coming year. “Stay hard, stay hungry, stay alive...if you can...and meet me in the dream of this hard land.” Stayed alive in 2018. That’s a big part of it! 2018, on the surface, was a good year. We saw Springsteen on Broadway in March. I released ‘The Big D’ and it actually won in the fiction category at the New England Book Festival. Me, Kathy and the boys enjoyed each other’s company. Melky & Paris went for a ride everyday! I battled leg, back and hip pain, but I ignored it and learned to live with it. I managed it with about 40 massages and spinal decompression. I climbed ladders and played golf on the good days. I played golf better than I had in 15 years and had a blast doing it with my great friends. By December, I released another book, “Everything I Know” and it fits right in with how I wanted to build a career.... ...and the...

There’s a pretty interesting, detailed essay about the rise of Trump as a president due to the reality star existence that we’ve been living for quite some time. There was a lot of attention given to the Apprentice show, which was a scripted, produced show designed to portray the Donald as a leader, and a powerful man. Raise your hand if you never saw an episode. I hope I’m not the only one with my hand raised. Yet, there has been an absolute mess of a discussion about Facebook and their involvement with Russia during the election. Ads were sold to people who were working hard to directly sway people who already in hate with a candidate. Professional writers took a great deal of time in composing fake stories. Then those who benefitted from fake news looked at what is actually news reporting and yelled, “Fake!” A lot of it seems to be water under a collapsing bridge, but this is our world now. How will we handle this moving forward? When there are shows masquerading a...

Years ago, my beautiful wife told me a story about a friend of hers who was going through some marital strife. “She found a bunch of Polaroid photos of his junk. He had a collection of them that he’d pass off to girls that he was interested in.” We had a good laugh. “Did you see it?” I asked. “God no!” She shrieked, but Angelina (fake name) found them and she’s pissed!” “As she should be.” Now, this was well before the phone craze. I must be an old dude because I find it pretty strange that someone might actually think enough of themselves to pass along such a photo... ...but it’s all the rage! The rumor isn’t that Mueller has a nude selfie of someone in the current administration. A lot of attractive women on Twitter send out statements every now and again because they’ve grown weary of seeing so many photos of “junk” from total strangers who are looking for a date. I don’t know any of my buddies who would send out such a photo... ...at least I don’t think so! ...

Malls have sort of fallen by the wayside in the 21st century. Back in the day, a trip to the mall was a full night out. A big pretzel or a cinnamon roll just after you walked through the door, a stop by the arcade for a few games or air hockey, a visit to the music store, and then the food court followed by a movie or the watering hole for a bunch of beer. We didn’t wander out to the Galleria Mall too often because it was a little further, and the car was always unfindable in the parking lot. Place was always packed. Last night, it appeared that Boxing Day was taken a little too literal. “Fights break out.” The news story was a roaring headline. There were reports of shots being fired... ...turned out to not be true, thankfully, but plenty of people were posting video. The fights were said to be gang-related and there’s were a bunch of them. It was pretty nasty and I thought a little bit about the men and women who were just at the mall to return a bum Christmas p...

I once wrote a story about a sad sack guy who always felt as if he were out of place. No matter where he was, he felt like he should be elsewhere. I thought about that yesterday as I returned to work. We all often work thinking about the weekend... ...and then when we get those days off... ...we sometimes wish to be back at work!! That happens to me every now and again. You see, I like routines. When I’m off for a few days, I become discombobulated. There’s no sense to it! “What are we doing today?” I’ll often ask on a day off. “I don’t know!” Kathy will say. All I’m asking for is a plan. I can manage a weekend because there’s enough of a vibe to make that work. I have a routine for a weekend. I don’t have a routine for a part of a Monday and a Tuesday off. I wander around a bit like a lost dog... ...wondering what I should do next. I mentioned it to the first crew I saw, believing that they’d laugh at me. “It kind of feels good to be back at work,” I ...

The Leone’s did the homemade pizza for Christmas Eve... ...crushed it. There was a megaphone. John started it off with a clean, lame joke about Santa. About thirty minutes later we ran out of jokes... ...one was more ‘dirty’ than the next. John’s horse joke made me laugh a few minutes before he even told the punch line. When he hit the punch I was dizzy from laughing. Didn’t think he’d tell that one. There was a book of photos of all of us from back in 1974. Everyone was crying by then. Carrie’s children and my children and Jim’s son... ...busting on each other. I pray they stay close. On Christmas morning, we didn’t get going too early... ...our kids now know that sleep is precious. The one gal who isn’t sleeping is my old dog, Melky. She’s been getting me out of bed in the middle of the night for about a month now. Maybe she heard Santa, but I was out there at 3:15, watching her do her thing... ...and I looked up. At the stars, in the frigid night....

A good buddy of mine texted a Christmas greeting on the 22nd... ...said that the negative thoughts and tweets and arguments were forcing him to go dark. He wanted to bring in the love. Leave the rest. That little text propelled me to think about the good stuff and try so hard to block the stupid things out. My beautiful wife, my adoring children and the two best dogs in the world are all pretty healthy. We’ve been able to be productive members of society... ...and we’ve all enjoyed one another’s company. There are presents under the tree. We painted the walls! Got new carpet! Replaced the dishwasher!! The Yankees won 100 games and next year will be better. I put two books out (with great covers) and might do two more next year. Mom spent a lot of time playing Bingo and eating pasta here. Healthy... ...happy. The year has been unsteady because of the mood of the country. Don’t need to bring that in every day. Merry Christmas to All! Things are all right...

The excitement of Christmas is almost too much for children everywhere. Back in North Collins in the 1970’s Christmas celebrations were a live thing. They had a pulse! We were excited from the moment our eyes opened on the 24th. “Who’s going to church when?” “What time are we going to Grandma’s?” Most of it was written in stone. Grandma and Grandpa Schryver usually showed up around noon on Christmas Eve. Once Dad arrived from work, it was game on. Mom and Dad were in perpetual motion. If Dad was cooking something to bring he was always open to let us try some. Six kids in a home, with undeniable excitement in the air was a powerful thing too. There was a good chance that a fight could break out, but mostly, we were running around helping. That first step into the door brought the whiff of the pizza. I’d be curious to find out how many pizzas Grandma made from scratch... ...but I was only interested in one... ...the anchovy one. Dad would start talking about that...

There’s a point in the Springsteen on Broadway session where he speaks of his father and how he, as a growing child, realizes that he needs approval. Bruce then tells the audience that he put himself in his Dad’s work uniform when he hit the road... ...right down to the work boots. “I write about factories. I’ve never seen the inside of one. I wrote about working hard. Never worked a 9-5 job in my life.” But he set himself up as a working man... ...because that’s what he knew. I think of that a lot when I’m lacing up my work books in the morning. I was the very last guy that my Dad would’ve thought would be in work boots every day. He was fond of telling me that he gave me two educations. He gave me more than that... ...and on his birthday I think of him even more than I do on just a typical work day, but I had the pleasure of working for him, and then with him. When I was his employee he only said it once: “People are watching you cause you’re the son of the boss...

The government was partially shut down at midnight. The stock market is in a freefall and just had its worst month since the Great Recession. Mattis quit because he wasn’t actually consulted on the troops leaving Syria... ...a move that was basically only loved by Putin. Trump put out a photo of steel slats that he wants to put up at the border to stop the Mexicans from pouring in to rape and pillage. It’s an unmitigated disaster. And it’s hard to watch... ...3 days away from Christmas and it feels like the whole thing is going up in smoke. Yet, I did laugh. At around 8:00, Trump posted a photo of himself behind the desk in the Oval Office. There were a stack of folders to his right. There was one open in front of him and he had the pen poised to make its mark. “Working hard after everyone else has gone home.” (Was the basis of his tweet). Because he knew the government was to be shuttered and he really wants to go to Florida... ...so he was pretending to ...

Unless you’ve written a book and had it published, you won’t know the feeling. Yet, long, long, long before that happens: There’s an idea! Like a bolt of lightning... ...and the first chapter rolls out. Really quickly. Writing chapter one is the easiest chapter by far... ...cause you’re fired up and the characters are brand new to you. The only thing I struggle with in chapter one is the first line of the book. I always want it to be a great line. I write that line over and over again. I hope someone notices that I take great care in the opening line of all my books! And then the trouble begins... ...the work. Like digging a really long ditch. I have 13 books out now. I have never not wanted to quit somewhere along the way. You have to be a pit bull. You need to blow away the fears and push past that “this sucks point!” And there’s the handling of the end. ‘Cause you sometimes don’t want to finish. Those characters, who lived in your head and heart...

Watched Jim Comey step out of his hearing about Clinton’s emails. He spoke about it: “Does that make any sense at all?” He asked. “Someone needs to stand up for the rule of law.” Like everyone else I was conflicted about Comey. He came out and said that Clinton’s emails was not a crime...was reckless, but not criminal (which was the correct call as those before and about a hundred people in this administration have handled info the same way). Yet, 10 days before the election he was faced with an impossible situation: Either reopen or be accused of cheating. He reopened the case and it was just enough to prove to the undecided that she was guilty of something... ...when she wasn’t. And now, he’s been dragged through the mud for two years, by a flailing, desperate criminal who has been caught red-handed. I like Comey. He’s a Republican (maybe a former one now) who is begging someone from the (former) party of law and order to “knock it the ‘F’ off!” And stand up! ...

My wonderful, Sabres-loving, heavy-metal listening, PHD-getting cousin, Kristin, has been inviting me, over the last couple of years to visit her college classes. At the onset of the semester her students get a copy of “Dogs On Main Street” and by the end of the semester I show up to talk about it. It’s great fun! Now, I chose Dogs as the go-to-Book for students studying social interactions and mental instability because all of those characters were a tad off. Here are some of the highlights: 1). Everyone looks so young!!! 2). I begin the talk by presenting how and why I became an author. You should see their faces when I mention that I had to write it long-hand, then buy a typewriter, and then learn how to two-finger type it in. If mistakes were made, it was all about white-out or tearing up the page. 3). “Okay, raise your hands if you like Springsteen!” I said. The young, some-black, some-white, some-Hispanic faces looked back. Some of them smiled. “Nobody?? Who y...

I saw a little boy at the grocery store. The kid stood about 3’ tall. He wanted a pack of Oreo’s. He really wanted them! It was an ear-piercing scream. “Santa’s coming!” The kid’s father said. Silence! I laughed. I also felt a pang of sadness... ...there’s no getting my big slobs to behave cause Santa is on the way. (Gotta’ get me some grandkids like my buddy, Jeff did - don’t see it happening any time soon!) At least the holiday falls on a Tuesday, right? Can’t see much going on during the Monday work hours either week. Yet, I haven’t been shopping either. Kathy gets everything taken care of in that department, and I’m not all that enamored with braving the crowds. I’m in charge of all things that deal with food... ...yet, I’m also looking forward to working a little less over the next couple of weeks. It’s Christmas after all! The father in the grocery store was a lot like I’d been back in the day. He bought the package of cookies. “You have to s...

For God’s sake, ‘Baby It’s Cold Outside’ is just a song about a man and woman flirting and debating spending the night together. It’s not a date rape situation. Dean Martin sang it for crying out loud! Feeling hurt over it is downright dumb. Know what’s dumber? Wanting to ban the Rudolph cartoon because of bullying. We all saw the cartoon as kids. The other reindeer were the villains of the story because that’s how stories are written. Good guys and bad guys! You feel bad for an animated red-nosed reindeer? My God! It’s a cartoon!!! Yet, that doesn’t take the cake. You know what takes the cake??? One in six people think that Santa Claus should be gender neutral. Does that sound right to anyone??? It’s freaking Santa Claus! Can’t we all just pretend that the fake guy who brings presents to every kid in the world by flying a sleigh and sliding down chimneys is actually the man that he was written to be? Are adults really upset about this??? Santa Claus...

We have had the same Christmas Tree since the boys were young. It was kind of a pitiful looking thing when it was brand new. Some 18 years later, well, it’s kinda’ sad. “Let’s get a new tree,” Kathy said, last year. “Maybe even a real one.” Sam wasn’t hearing anything about it. “That’s OUR tree! No way!!” So, last year at this time we decided to give it a solid effort. When Sam put it in the stand, I actually took some time and opened up the branches a little before the ornaments went on... .,.unbeknownst to me, Kathy did the same thing. By the time all the ornaments were on... ...it actually looked really good. “Go look for the tree,” I said, to Sam on Friday night. On Saturday morning, I found a couple of pieces stuffed in a closet. When I saw Sam I said, “Get it set up.” My boys have my mechanical abilities. I watched him struggle to keep it straight in the stand. “Bring it here,” I said. It didn’t look right. “Wait a minute. There’s a piece missing.” ...

It was delivered to my phone in the dead of the night. (I hate how music is delivered). I had another problem. I don’t know how to synchronize my phone... (It was in synch once). But I had an aux cord. (I tried it). And it kinda’ worked. The music was playing through my car speakers. (Kind of). Bruce’s voice was hard to hear and I couldn’t believe that they released it in such poor quality. (Then I plugged the cord all the way in). Scared the shit out of me. (Then I listened). “It’s the greatest production in the history of music, by the greatest entertainer in the universe,” I texted to Kathy, who’d also seen the show. “No doubt,” she said. (And it is). Millions of people will hear it and see it now. (It’s on Netflix on Sunday). In this day and age it should be required viewing for every human being... ...it’s about love and family and doubt and depression and happiness and God. (It truly is beautiful). I listened for two and a half hours. T...

I get sad thinking that Tom Petty isn’t here anymore. He had a record, “Let Me Up, I’ve Had Enough.” Kept thinking that as I listened to the news reports. Trump was locked in his bedroom all day yesterday. I guess he came out today because he said that he didn’t know anything about Cohen paying off his women, and that it’s not a crime anyway. His defense being that he hired Cohen to be a lawyer and didn’t pay attention. Then an hour later he said that Cohen was a lightweight who didn’t do much for him outside of PR work. Then he said that Flynn didn’t lie and the FBI is giving him a deal because they know he didn’t lie. He fired Flynn... ...for lying to the FBI. Then news broke about the Russian spy pleading guilty for conspiring with the NRA and the Republicans. Then it was announced that they are investigating stolen money during the inauguration. If he wasn’t president he’d already be facing felony charges. It’s going to get worse. So, he locked himself in ...

...done dirt cheap. Michael Cohen, Trump’s lawyer, has joined Trump’s campaign manager in jail. Everyone who reported on the story kept saying, “Dirty Deeds.” And for a half an hour I was stuck singing the AC/DC song: “Dirty deeds, done dirt cheap.” Over and over and over again. And it’s weird, but I almost felt bad for the guy. He has a wife and a couple of kids and it can’t be easy to know that for the better part of the next 3 years you’re going to sit in a cage because your conduct deserves punishment. Cohen deserves it. He was a tax fraud. He lied, cheated, and acted like a real scumbag under the direction of his boss. I’m hoping that he comes clean about all of it now and gets another year off. It certainly appears that all the secrets are being told. Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap. It’s all good man! I also have to check in on the Harold Baines being sent to the baseball Hall of Fame. Baines was a good player. He was never great. He certainly wasn’t as g...

I have a work buddy who’s been battling hard with an elderly Mom. Well, it’s not his Mom he’s battling with as much as it is life that’s giving him trouble. “She’s in her 80’s and her health isn’t great. We have to bring a nurse on for six hours a day, and me and my siblings are taking turns making her dinner. They voted to put her in a home. I said, ‘She ain’t going,’ so, she’s living with me.” That’s a little rough... ...he works all day and then sits with his Mom, and she’s really struggling. “Know what she asked me the other day?” He asked. I shrugged. “She asked me how old I was when I figured out that life is all bullshit.” I laughed. “She was serious! It was Sunday and she slept late. I kept checking on her, but she was snoring. I was worried. Finally, I got her up. She couldn’t sleep all day. She went from the bed to the bathroom to the table, where she hardly ate, to the couch, and she was starting to fall asleep. Then she said the ‘life is bullshit’ comment....

I’m 54 years old. Haven’t missed many days of work in 38 years. I’m currently in a precarious position. Seems I don’t have any shoes. Even when I’m high on the hog I only ever have 3 pair. Work boots, a pair of sneakers and a pair of dress shoes. I wear the dress shoes 3 times a year. They’re currently in good condition, but I can’t wear them for my job, or with my relaxing clothes. I have a pair of work boots, and I’m currently wearing those, but they’re in rough shape. They’re flapping a little. “Santa is bringing you a pair,” Kathy informed me. So, I’m supposed to tough these out until the 25th. And normally, I have a pair of sneakers. They were good sneakers. They were in good shape. Black. Very stylish. Comfortable. I wore them to dinner with the Leone’s on Saturday night, took them off when I returned home, went to bed, figuring they’d be all right... ...they are gone. Vanished! “Where the hell are my sneakers?” I asked everyone in the house. “...

I was a tad aggravated at ten o’clock on Saturday because I was dumb enough to drive around the neighborhood with the Bills playing at home. I couldn’t even think of who they were playing. Oh yeah, Jets. The battle for last place. It was cold, but not too bad and the sun was shining, but the very last thing I would have wanted to do was go and sit in a stadium and watch a football game between two teams going nowhere. I haven’t been to a football game since 2002 and have only been to three of them since the Super Bowl Era. It’s a young man’s game. Yet, the kids were into it. Kathy went to Bingo... ...so I watched the young kids play. Josh Allen and Sam Darnold. Flags flying everywhere. Another big star run out of the league for attacking a woman... ...hardly made a blip. But man that sport has a stranglehold on Sunday. Men, women and children all out there, the place is packed. A ton of money changing hands. Let’s build them a new stadium! I guess I get it...

John Lennon was shot to death at the age of 40. That will never not make me feel a twinge of sadness, and I think of one of his most famous lines: “Life is what happens when you’re making other plans.” I went to a wake, a funeral and a hospital this week. Heart hurting for good friends. One who died, one who lost a beautiful wife and a really good friend who is battling some serious health issues. “What’s my blood pressure?” He asked me as I stood at his hospital bed. I read it to him. “What’s that number under it?” He asked. “31. It says 31. What’s that?” “They’re measuring Your I.Q.,” I said. He laughed. It hurt him to laugh. “Get out!” He said. “Why do you have to make me laugh?” I thought about that a lot after I left him. All the laughs... ...with a lot of people through the years. And a strange thing happened to me this week. I sent out a bunch of “I love you, friend,” texts. Said the same to my family. “If I end up face down in a plate of linguine...

Despite the fact that he proclaimed himself innocent immediately after the news broke on the Cohen & Manafort sentencing statements... ...the so-called president has been implicated in a couple of felonies. It’s just the tip of the iceberg. He couldn’t be acting anymore guilty. His twitter feed reads like the frenzied rantings of a petulant child. I was driving a long way when the news broke. The talking heads were breaking down the fairly apparent connections between the campaign and Russia. Manafort is in jail. Cohen is going too. Flynn is guilty and cooperating. And on and on and on. It made me really sad. I actually said this out loud to the inside of my car: “The president of the United States has committed campaign finance crimes, most likely conspired with the country that ran interference with our election. He not only did not stop it. He helped them do it. Then they all lied.” Just saying it made me angry. How could it not???? I thought some more ...

Back in 1998, I met a foreman on a job site. Nice long Italian last name. He actually spoke broken English because he was an off-the-boat Italian guy. We hit it off because we talked homemade sausage and about twenty different sauces that we made for our families. He was also a good worker... ...and didn’t ever want an OSHA violation or an injured worker. He called me every week. I helped him a lot. In 2010, he called with some bad news. “I have leukemia,” he said. He was about 55 when they broke the news. Kids, grandkids  and a wife. “Damn!” “I’m good,” he said. “They caught it early. I’ll be good as new.” And he was. We had lunch in 2016. He looked great. Back to work. We had a bowl of pasta. Funny thing, he called me last week. “We need to do lunch again,” he said. “Definitely! How you feeling?” “Fit as a fiddle.” So, we had time. You always think there’s more time... ...he got a little fluid on his lungs... ...went in for a checkout. ...

Can’t tell you all how old Corinne is today. She’d kill me! But there’s a meal in our immediate future. We like to eat good food! I’m thinking a little seafood, a lot of steak. And even more laughs. “Want to grab dinner with Corinne and Chuckles?” I asked Kathy. “Absolutely!” So, there will be laughs. There will be a little pain involved. Years ago, the first time we all went to dinner for the first time, Corinne and I ordered appetizers, our main meal and then an add-on lobster tail. “Really?” Kathy asked. “This ain’t a f****ng game,” Corinne answered! Happy Birthday, big sis. Your brother, sister-in-law, and nephews love you. (Melky and the Pair-Pair too!)

My boys are fond of saying: “Drake is dropping a new record! I didn’t know much about “Dropping things”! Yet, I have been writing every day (except for a few months back when I was really, really sad) since... ...hell, about 1975! I have a lot in the vault! (So someone dig through if I go face first into a dish of linguine & clams). But the “drop dates” have come to mean something to me. I did one for a very faithful reader - Dicci Montaldi - cause she asked me to. I chose Decenber 06 for my sister Corinne for “Everything I Know” cause I love her! And I laughed a little because a few people have burrowed their way under my skin for years when it comes to writing: “Why does it take you so long?” “I found a spelling error.” “That’s now what you meant!” “When’s the next one done?” “I liked your last one better.” “You swore too much!” And that’s always kind of made me laugh because like I once told my beautiful wife: “I love everything about telling ...

He liked dogs... ...and baseball. He was a war hero. Jumped out of planes on 80th, 85th and 90th birthdays. Actually had a humane immigration policy. Was married for 73 years and defended his family. Voted against Trump, accurately referring to him as a blowhard. And deserves a solid goodbye because he acted like a gentleman, and seemingly loved his country at every turn... ...and politically I wasn’t a fan. Same with W. I didn’t much care for the wars and the destruction of Iraq, or the policies for the already rich. Yet, there are just four living presidents now. Carter, Clinton, George W., and Obama. (I don’t much count the current one because I’m not sure who that is). He will be laid to rest later this week and will be beside his wife and daughter (who never had a chance to live much). I do recall my grandfather, father and mother not truly caring for the Bush Family, but I have certainly softened towards them... ...from W.’s words at Trump’s inaugu...

Kareem Hunt is a terrific runner. His team, the Kansas City Chiefs, is a super bowl contender this year. If they’re to win it, it’ll be without Hunt. Back in February he was involved in a altercation with a young woman. The Chiefs and the NFL knew about it. Hunt was allowed to play after he was interviewed and he assured all that he didn’t touch the woman. It was a he-said, she-said thing. Until it wasn’t. TMZ debuted a video and it was clear that Hunt pushed her, pushed someone into her, and then kicked her. And get this: The Chiefs cut him!!! For lying!!! They put out a statement that condemned the lie. They didn’t mention the hitting the woman thingie, perhaps because they have another man or two on the team who’ve been mentioned as doing the same thing. The NFL??? They were investigating, but they just didn’t have the information needed to suspend the man. Take a little air out of a ball (allegedly) though and there’s hell to pay, and a special counsel wil...

On every television show if the phone rings in the middle of the night the character looks at the clock and says: “It’s three in the morning!” Well, funny thing is that I’ve had my sleep disorder this past week (happens every couple of months)... ...I’ve been up at 3:00 on the dot four straight nights! At unfortunately, I think about what the hell might have happened in this crazy government. They call it the Donald Trump condition and believe it or not, it’s a real problem. All of the upheaval and chaos is a syndrome of sorts. Twitter is a real problem for someone who can’t sleep. If you pick up the phone and start scrolling there’s a real chance that you’ll be sucked into the stupidity... ...especially if he’s out of the country. “Witch Hunt!!!” What makes me laugh is that he actually confessed to crimes. “Just did a little light deal. Very cool. Everyone knew about it.” And that’s how he shifts the story... ...for two years it was: “I don’t have any deals w...

I don’t eat at fast food places. But when I was out in Kansas (after some prompting by Pops) I went to Chik-Fil-A. Damn! The spicy chicken sandwich is good! (I usually had more than one), and I stopped every time I went to the job in Olathe. Well, big news!!! We have one in the Buffalo area. I was happy to hear that, but I grew a little perplexed when I heard that people were camped out in the parking lot awaiting the grand opening. The prize for doing so is a free chicken sandwich a week for the entire year. Dudes... ...it’s a chicken sandwich! They’re $3.00!! I wouldn’t camp out for Bruce tickets at this point in my life. A chicken sandwich???? I’m sure that I’ll make my way over sometime soon... ...but given the reaction to the opening it may be a little while. Cripes! Chicken sandwiches topped our local news! They’re on the hot trail of the rotund, orange clown and Russia is attacking their neighbors... ...and here in Buffalo... ...we’re camp...

On Thanksgiving a story broke about a 5-year-old child losing his life, one town over from where we live. I saw the headline: Wouldn’t click on the story. Saw an update a few hours later, the kid was struck by a car. There were a few of those in my youth. They were too sad to think about. Yet, the story was even sadder than that. His father was behind the wheel. I just couldn’t even read the story. Sometimes life is way too cruel. As a Dad, I didn’t want to think about it. As a man, I would be destroyed by the particulars. I’ve dealt with sadness in my life and at my job. “How does that family survive?” Someone texted me. “Love,” I answered. “It’s their only chance.” I thought about faith, and friends, and the love of the man’s spouse, and other children... ...but even then... ...there will be a huge hole in a space where all that was there was love. I didn’t want to think about it from the perspective of a Dad, or a friend, or even a stranger a Town over......

What kind of mess is this guy in? Just a couple of years ago, he was your run of the mill rich dude. He joined the Trump campaign and all hell broke loose. He was arrested and there was a raid on his home and business. They allowed him to stay out of jail, but he was confined to his home as he awaited trial. There wasn’t a whole lot of suspense in his trials. He was found guilty on every count, and for good measure he stood accused of trying to tamper with witnesses. Went straight to jail, but there was still a chance to get a reduced sentence. He was probably hopeful of a pardon, but a lot of the charges were state charges... ...so he sat in an isolated area of jail. Then we heard that he was a cooperating witness. Uh-oh! There was so much speculation about what might happen. The squeeze was on and at the age of 69 he was going to come with the information so that he didn’t have to spend the rest of his days in jail. And on Monday the cooperating witness deal was...

There are people out there who are strongly opposed to abortion because all life is sacred... ...they are also of the opinion that those slaughtered in school shootings are collateral damage to keeping gun rights intact. There are people who loudly proclaim that God is necessary to Make America Great Again...they let all know that following Jesus is essential... ...but ignore that Jesus was especially kind to the least of his brothers. The anti-abortion crowd is also, usually pro-death penalty. Those who want to make sure that women have their children... .,.don’t much care if those children, once born, can be fed, clothed or properly cared for. Putting Christ back in Christmas is important... ...to people who would reject Jesus, Mary and Joseph if they appeared at the border looking for a room at the inn. That family might actually be tear-gassed if they showed up. ‘Cause given their country of origin... ...they weren’t the preferred race of people who deserve ba...

I must confess, it was a rough couple of months for me. It’s not a secret that I don’t care for change, but what I hate more than change is clutter or a mess. The house felt overly messy to me. We desperately needed an interior paint job, and there were a few nicks and holes in the drywall in a couple of spots. I learned to patch a hole, and then I started painting. I would do a room at a time, and after finishing each one I said, “I can’t do this.” But I did. A couple of weeks of pure hell, and the one thing I did was ruin the carpeting. We were replacing it anyway. I put in the order, and picked out what we wanted. The set the appointment out 10 days. Then they postponed it. On Wednesday, they were due. But they came in the early afternoon. “Should only take a few hours,” the crew leader said. They got started at 1:00. Didn’t finish until 9:00. I spent that time locked in my room with the dogs. I put everything back where it belonged and then noticed tha...

We were all chatting about the summer we spent in California. “That was ‘83,” I said. “I don’t remember,” Mom said. Yet I asked her if she remembered the flight we took that year. She laughed. I remember it like it was yesterday. It was just me and Mom flying out because I’d just finished my first year of college, and she was going with me for a visit. She’d return a week later to ride out the school year with the others. We got stuck in Chicago for a few hours (flights delayed). “Let’s get a drink,” Mom said. (I was legal to drink at 18). Some 5 hours later we met Dad at the San Francisco airport. “What the hell?” Dad asked when he saw us. “You two are pissed up!” We had laughed hard all day. Then, of course, the famous first trip over the Golden Gate Bridge. Just as we got on the bridge, Mom opened the window and flicked what was left of her cigarette out the window... ...and straight into the backseat where I was sitting, and where it instantly came int...

Tiger Woods is a magnet. People just seem to want to watch him play golf... ...so they designed a match - Tiger versus Phil...for $9 million dollars... ...loser gets nothing. It was supposed to be a pay-per-view event and I didn’t buy it, but I saw on Twitter that Phil was up one. And then I stumbled across the feed that was showing it for free. (Something went wrong with how they were collecting money...so they gave it away). Good for me because it was a lot of fun. First off, they hit shots that I will not manage in this lifetime. Routinely they drive the ball over 300 yards. They chip out of the sand with precision. They putt it close every time. Yet, they are also human. Tiger missed a putt that should’ve won it on 18. Phil missed 3 straight chances to win it. On hole 22, Tiger knew he had to make the birdie and he left it short. “Can you imagine having a 5’ putt for $9 million?” I asked my beautiful wife. “Would you make it?” She asked. “I could. I wo...

At our Thanksgiving meal... ...another amazing spread provided by Jim.... ...My Mom was talking to me, Jim, John and Corinne about some of our escapades. “I went in to talk to one of your teachers right at the start of the year because she gave one of you an assigned seat on the first day. She said, “you’re a Fuzzy. You have to sit in the front.” Mom was getting angry just talking about it again. (That was Jim). “Then there was the time your father went down to the school because one of the teachers hit one of you on the head with a book. (That was John). The tone in Mom’s voice was one of a protector. She didn’t want any of her children wrongly targeted. “I’m gonna’ fill you in on something,” I said. “We deserved all of it.” Mom laughed. “Seriously, we were all wise-asses. We should have been in the front row because we were always in the middle of the trouble.” Corinne tried to get me to admit to something. “Did you ever skip school?” “Nope.” “Ever get deten...

Life can beat you down. It’s actually pretty relentless, and definitely is not for the meek. Which is all the more the reason for being thankful. This Thanksgiving I’m thankful, first off for my brother, John. Thanksgiving falls on his birthday this year, and now he’s 55. Which means I made it through the time when we were the same age without getting a beating. Can’t say it didn’t happen before. When we were kids, Dad once said, “Pick on someone your own age.” From October 18 to November 22, we were the same age. So, he’d beat me. I’m also thankful for my Mom. Her birthday is on the 25th. I’m thankful for my beautiful wife and adoring kids, and my siblings, nieces and nephews. It’s been a little bit of a wild ride this year, but I’m truly thankful for where I live, and the freedoms we still enjoy. I’m grateful that I can still get up and go to work, and that I still enjoy what I do. But, as I said... ...it’s too easy to forget to live a life of gratitude. O...

How can it be America First if we abandon the values that America stood for? If we turn our backs on the sick, the poor and the viciously attacked and dismembered... ...aren’t we destroying ourselves in the process? The American Flag has always been a symbol of a whole bunch of things to me. “And to the republic for which it stands. One nation under God, indivisible with liberty and justice for all.” How does that stand now? Liberty and justice for all? An American based journalist was chopped up and dissolved in acid. The CIA, with certainty, communicated that Saudi Arabian leaders ordered the murder. “We stand by Saudi Arabia!” ‘Cause of deals. Big deals!!! Hundreds of billions of dollars. Millions and millions of jobs. America First! But here’s the thing about selling your soul for money... ...it makes your life... ...not worth a damn nickel. “I like Saudi Arabia. They give me $40 or $50 million for condos.” He said that in the last couple of year...

For some reason I can recall the night before Thanksgiving more than I can actually remember the Holiday meal. There was the stop at the Fox’s Den one afternoon when my first drink was a Bloody Mary. I was with my sister and a couple of her friends. I’m not sure how many Bloody Mary’s I drank that night... ...but it was more than 5. Then there were the nights when I hung with my college roommates. We were packed to go to our homes. “Want a beer before we go?” My roomie George asked. “One,” I said. He came back from the bar with beer number two. “I said one!” I said. “One each,” he said. We never moved our cars that night... ...ended up back in our rooms... ...left for home on Thanksgiving morning. (Mom wasn’t thrilled with that move). They say that the night before Thanksgiving is one of the busiest nights of the year for hanging in a bar. It’s been a lot of years since I pulled off that particular maneuver. I just know that I did a lot of eating just to...

Jake has been looking for a car for some time now. When you’re 21 years old, it kind of dominates your thoughts. I recall being in that part of life and wanting things to go faster. Yet, my beautiful wife was on the front line of that particular endeavor and when she’s around... ...things tend to slow down. Her motto is “Why do it today if you can put it off until tomorrow?” But, I decided to help Jake. “We go Saturday morning,” I said. “But you better be ready because I nap on Saturday by 1:00.” (They all know that the office is closed from 1-3). He was ready. We headed straight in to the dealership and met with a couple of guys I know. Ten minutes later we were sitting in a car driving down the road. Jake liked it. I liked it. The salesman loved that he was only 12 minutes into it and was selling a car. “Here’s the thing,” I said. “I don’t do details. We’ll take it, but we’re done. I’ll come back to sign things if I have to, but other than that, you’re dealing...

I really can’t take the stupidity anymore. I don’t understand the people who have his back either. Trump came out and said that the fires could’ve been avoided had the forest been raked like they do in Finland. He also said, “people are burned beyond recognition.” How tone deaf can someone be? There are a thousand people still missing, the fires are still raging. People ran for their lives, leaving their homes... ...Americans being destroyed by a tragedy. An American President needs to be a consoler. He needs to let people know that it will be all right... ...somewhere down the line. It’s not about placing blame because it’s a state that didn’t vote red, and there are experts in the field of forest management. Believe it or not, Trump doesn’t know more than everyone in every field about everything. I heard it said, when he was running for President that he offered highly simplistic solutions to extremely complicated problems. Raking it out? I don’t know much abo...

Drove from Buffalo to Syracuse after working all day, and I barely beat the snow. It was a rough drive, and I was beat. I just wanted to get to my room and rest for an hour before dinner with some friends. I have one demand for when I’m checking in: Do it fast. The young lady behind the desk didn’t have any such urgency. She was actually chatting with a coworker. I placed my credit card and license on the counter. “Name?” She asked. “Fazzolari. I booked it online.” “Spell it.” I pushed the card towards her. She turned to her coworker again. “Can you believe she said that?” She asked. They both laughed. She picked up my card and set it down again, turned back to her buddy. “So, I told Ann that she should be fired. No way that should be tolerated!” Looked at me again. “What was the name?” “Oh give me a break here,” I said. She looked at me as if I were an absolute lunatic. “Are we tired?” She asked. “I don’t know if we are, but I am.” She went to t...

So, Roy Clark passed away. Stan Lee too. I guess the longer you stick around, the more you see your youth fade away. Hee-Haw was on Sunday nights. It was pretty hard to miss in the 1970’s, and watching Roy Clark and Buck Owens playing and singing... ...and hearing the corny jokes. It was quality entertainment. My kids give me weird looks when they catch me watching Quincy, or Columbo or The Odd Couple. “How does it feel to know that everyone on the show you’re watching is dead?” Jake asked as I watched Peter Falk, as Columbo, muddle his way through the interview of a suspect. “It’s sad,” I said. “Watch this with me. It was a great show.” Jake hung in for a little while... ...Columbo is a 2-hour show... ...that’s tough for the new generation. “It’s good isn’t it?” I asked. “He’s amusing,” Jake said, and then he bailed. As for Stan Lee... ...Spider-Man is an absolute classic. As a kid he was a cartoon... ...then the movies came along. “We just wanted...

So, a woman is too emotional to be president, huh? Trump flew to France... ...didn’t go to the cemetery for the ceremony to honor fallen soldiers. ‘Cause it was raining. All the other leaders made it. Copters can usually make it through the rain, and even if the weather was actually the reason, he could’ve squeezed in to catch a ride. He stayed back. Was 2 hours late for dinner on that trip. Flew home and skipped the trip to Arlington to place a wreath on Veterans Day. (So much for kneeling during the anthem, huh?) The White House released a statement saying, “he was in for the day.” At 10 a.m. The next day the chatter was all about: “He’s pissed at everyone.” There are troops at the border, away from their families for Thanksgiving, waiting on a caravan of invaders (who haven’t been mentioned since the election). There are rumors as to why the president is in a foul mood... ...he’s mad about the Dems winning the house... ...Junior is about to be indicte...

The Bills released Nate Peterman. Yep. They just up and cut their Game 1 Starting Quarterback from the 2018 season. What a story it could’ve been. Last year, the Bills were muddling along and their coaches made a decision to sit their regular QB and give Nate a start... ...on the road, against a good team. (I even knew a few dopes who flew across the country to watch the game). Nate threw 5 interceptions in a half. He said all the right things... ...he would learn, he’d work harder, he’d be better through adversity. And sure enough, he won the job!! And stunk again! More picks. Booed off the field, joke after joke on the Internet. He spoke of his faith and how God loved him even though the fans hated him. He went back to the bench. An injury put him back on the field... ...and he threw a clutch TD to give the Bills a lead... ...he was going to be a hero!!! Then he threw two more interceptions. “Maybe he’s blind,” one of my kids said. There was on...

My Lord, the wild fires in California are simply devastating. I watched a woman drive through the fire as she tried to make it out, and here in the land of blizzards, it’s hard to fathom, but look at the list of the most devastating fires ever. The majority have happened in 2017 and 2018. Couple that with hurricane storms that are ‘once every hundred year’ storms that now happen every few months... ...and it’s hard not to believe that something is amiss. The woman in the car was praying hard to make it to safety and I’m sure all of our minds would go there, but there are also some “preachers” who claim that the devastation is a result of God being angry about lifestyle choices. So, removing some of the religion from it... ...I’m horrified by the loss of lives, animals and property. The news of the day often seems overwhelming, and that has to be doing something to our collective psyche. There was also another mass shooting to check in on, and the images from that nigh...