Thoughts of a Common Man

Kathy went out on Black Friday. Didn’t go well. She was trying to get some crazy deal on an I-phone and because of some garbage with Verizon. So, because she can hardly move yet, I was hooked in. I headed into Wal-Mart, which I don’t do more than once a year, and headed straight to the electronics department. Laptops are only $300??? 50-inch televisions are $299? There are all kinds of cases for I-phones? Big headphones? I headed for the back counter and it seemed like 70 people were just standing around. “Is there a line here?” I asked. A guy in a ‘Make America Great’ hat said: “It’s a mess.” So, I edged by him and walked up to a guy behind the counter. “My wife was in here last night and tried, unsuccessfully, to buy an I-phone.” I handed him the slip of paper and he said: “Oh, I have that right here.” Couple of clicks later and he asked: “Are you the account holder?” “No.” “You’ll have to be in the account to get the phone.” He pulled up the

It’s been a weird football season. There are some absolutely horrible teams: The Dolphins, Bengals, Giants, Redskins, Falcons, Jets (most of the time), Denver. Just awful. Like they aren’t even trying. So, it’s been hard to get a handle on whether or not the teams who are actually winning. Are they actually good? I have zero idea how good the 10-1 Patriots and 49ers are. The Ravens hammered the Patriots but the Browns also hammered the Ravens. The Bills? They needed final drives to beat the Jets and the winless Bengals. They got beat by the Browns and hammered by the mediocre Eagles. Yesterday, I imagined that they would be stuffed in Dallas on Thanksgiving. That’s what the Bills have done for the last 20+ years... ...lost when it matters most. Dallas went 75 yards to score on the first drive and I felt dread... ...not for me (I really don’t care) but for my boys. They’ve seen one playoff game in all the years they’ve been alive and the Bills scored 3 poin

Truth be told, the longer you go, the less enthusiastic one may be about some things in life. It’s easy to do. “Life goes on. Long after the thrill of living is gone.” Mellencamp wrote a great line there, and someone quoted it to me after we found out about the death of a small town friend. And here comes Thanksgiving. An odd year here. We don’t have a kid in the house for the next four days. I have some mighty sore legs and I’m the healthy one. Kathy is still in a neck brace for another couple of weeks. The wind is howling outside. One show leads to the next. But I’m thankful. And lately, I’ve taken to ignoring the outside noise that has dominated the news. Russia’s plan for America was to bring unrest in the form of disinformation that would directly divide the country. It worked, and it wouldn’t have had there been some attention paid to what we need to be thankful for. We’re free here. I have a roof over my head, more than enough to eat, good kids, a wif

So, my boy, Jake and I spend a lot of time talking about writing and artists. So far Jake hasn’t asked me much about actually doing the writing but he certainly appreciates a good lyric. I have sent him some of the most profound of all my favorite artists. “That’s why he’s a legend,” he said, after I went over ‘Moonlight Motel’ from the Springsteen record. So, I decided to open my mind a little. I actually love Slim Shady when he goes funny. The videos of Eminem’s comical raps are great and that guy can sling a phrase. But man, rap is hard for me... ...it’s usually played too loud and all I hear is the bass and they go fast! Jake sent me a quote from Springsteen when someone asked him who he liked. “Kendrick Lamar is making outstanding art.” What??? Bruce said that about a rapper? “You should try it,” Jake said. “Okay. I have a long drive,” I said. “Send me 5 songs I should download.” Jake sent the titles along. I definitely got bored on the drive. Loaded

Rick Perry, a guy who has never hit me as someone who is overly bright, did an interview where he made the claim that Donald Trump is ‘the chosen one.’ As in chosen, by God, not Vladimir. Now anyone who has read this blog understands that my faith in ‘the chosen one’ has never been all that much. I don’t know of one redeeming trait that he has. Doesn’t love dogs! How can you not love a good dog? Speaks nastily about every single person who doesn’t love him. If you love him he is nice to you. He lies. God chose him to lie constantly about everything? Let’s ask Rick Perry: Through history God has made some questionable choices as a leader of people. That’s what Perry said. Maybe God was going for full deception...throw people off the scent. God: “We need someone to save the world.” Saint Peter: “who you thinking about? Jimmy Carter is still building homes for the poor.” God: “He’s got a bad hip.” Saint Peter: “What about Trump?” God: “The fraud guy?? F

On Saturday we gathered to celebrate Mom’s birthday and as usual, Jim made enough food for 500 and we all did our best to make sure Mom knows how much she’s loved... ...and she had a great time. Got some Red Lobster gift cards, some Yankees gear and a few scratchers...which she loves. And she looks great! At one point she was stepping out for a cigarette and my Aunt Franny asked her when she was gonna quit smoking. “I’m 80! It’s gone all right.” And Pops hooked us up too with wontons stuffed with pepper stuffing. They were gone. And when I think of Mom two words come to mind: 1). Books - my love of reading was her gift to me. And 2). Strength - she was pregnant 27 out of 31 months! She never stopped working when we were all there and the washer and dryer never stopped. She’d have your clothes back in your room, folded, and put away before you were ready to wear a shirt again. And she handled Dad... ...no easy task. So, we had a nice time... ...paying tribu

The digits on my phone just changed to 1:00. I’ve been laying in my bed since 10:00. Yeah. On a Saturday night. Because I was coming off 2 lousy nights of sleep. It all started on Thursday night in a hotel. Asleep at 10:00 and wide awake at 03:00. I battled through night and got back to sleep from 4:30 to 6:00. Dead tired as I went through the work day. Friday night would be better. I didn’t sleep a straight hour all night. Sleep walking on Saturday. And here I am... ...exhausted. As soon as my head hits the pillow my eyes jut open. I even tried warm milk! And it usually passes as it arrives - quickly. But man. It sucks!

There was a lot of talk in the impeachment hearing about 2 and 2 equaling 4. And it made me think about Springsteen on Broadway when he talked about 1&1 equaling 2... ...but that the magic happens when 1&1 equals 3. “That’s where the magic happens.” “That’s where love shows it’s face.” Yeah, when it doesn’t make sense. It’s where the creativity lives. 1&1 = 3. It’s my preferred place to be. Where something exceptional happens against the odds. I was talking about writing with a good friend of mine. He made my night by going over the entire plot of ‘Nobody’s Home’ and he brought me back to the days when I was writing it. It was a story about a tragedy in my hometown. I took the main elements of the story and fictionalized it. 1 - the story + 1 - the act of writing it. = 3 Sitting at a restaurant talking about the finished product... ...15 years later. 1 - boy meets girl + 1 - girl meets boy = 3 A long marriage, kids, grandkids an

Crazy. My brother John is closer to 60 than he is to 50. I remember hanging with him every minute of every day when we were kids. Flying high on the swing set. Playing ball. Boxing. Playing king of the mountain out on the end... ...life came charging up the hill. Man, it charged up the hill! And one of the best text threads that I’m on from time to time is me and my siblings and Chuck. Going back and forth... ...making each other laugh. John always has the corniest of jokes. He perfected telling Dad jokes and has been telling them for a lot of years. Some are so dumb that you have to laugh. On last nights thread we were all in different cities. John was telling jokes. The rest of us finally told him to go to bed. He had a big day on the horizon: 56. Hard to believe. Happy Birthday, brother... ...we love you.

Sondland sort of did it. He didn’t actually have a John Dean moment, but he definitely gave it a whirl... ...sang like canary. Immediately they tried to lower the Barr. It felt like a different kind of moment, but by the end of the day, they were doing their best - on each side of the aisle - to make it fit their narrative. It’s more about what we do to somehow move forward when all this garbage is over. Thought about that a little today... ...not sure that there’s a way through. Ran into a millennial today. I was getting a new windshield installed. Sat in the repair shop. The impeachment hearing was on in the room. “How does anyone vote for him again?” The kid asked. I nodded. “How did anyone vote for him once. He’s just a POS.” I know better than to respond in public... ...there were about 4 other people in the room. The youngster wasn’t done. “Must be nice to spend your entire work day just slinging mud. Nothing is gonna’ happen.” Then the kid was

So, Tuesday brought 4 witnesses to the impeachment hearings. The Republicans actually wanted to hear from two of them... ...one of the others was a Purple Heart veteran who was quickly bashed by the GOP quiz masters... ...they like soldiers who don’t get hurt. But the afternoon session brought Volker and Morrison. The GOP was happy they were included so the witch hunt could be fully exposed. Uh, nope! They backed up the story everyone was telling. The money was being withheld until Trump got his investigation of Biden. It happened. Like we all knew it did. Now what? There’s no spin left. Quid quo pro - check. Extortion - check. Bribery - check. Abuse of power - oh yeah. There’s more to do. Sondland will drive the final nail in the case tomorrow... ...and then what? Some are saying that the trip to Walter Reed was to bring about the resignation for health reasons in an effort to avoid the possible indignity of getting tossed. Others are saying tha

Melky is a pain in everyone’s ass. If you happen to get up from your seat, she takes it. She’ll sit in her going out spot and when I get up to take her, she won’t go. “Go!” Everyone yells... ...and she will do it when she’s good and ready. “She’s a real asshole,” Kathy is fond of saying. Kathy and the dog are currently challenging one another for the couch time title. But, man, that dog is determined. On Monday morning I was out of bed by 5:00. Melky was sleeping soundly. I headed out thinking I could leave her in bed rather than going through the morning ritual. I needed to be at the airport by 6:00. I was sipping my coffee, and watching the news when I heard her jump off the bed. “Are you kidding me?” I heard her coming down the dozen steps. One at a time, grunting all the way. She stood there looking at me. “Why didn’t you stay in bed?” I asked, expecting an answer. I let her out. She sniffed a lot of the back yard... ...took a long pee... ...came b

Myles Garrett won’t be playing football for the Browns for the rest of the year. Unless you’ve been under a rock, you’ve seen the footage. A brawl broke out at the very end of the Browns game with the Steelers. The Steelers QB, Mason Rudolph, was the guy wrestling around with Garrett. They were both yanking at each other’s helmets and Garrett got Rudolph’s. Then he swung it... ...in an effort to put it back on, I guess. Ugly scene. I was initially horrified until Pops reminded me of some of the brawls I used to get into with my brothers back in the day. “You were all trying to brain one another.” True. Yet, I thought about the worst things I’d seen in sport. 1). Kermit Washington breaking Rudy T’s face back in the 1980’s. Horrible. Still the worst. It was a sucker punch and it nearly killed Rudy T. 2). Marty McSorely banged his hockey stick over Donald Brashear’s head. A seizure on ice is scary. Clear assault and battery. 3). Ronald Artest going into the crowd.

It’s a never-ending battle to get your shit together isn’t it? I don’t know who was the comedian who said, “I finally got my shit together and I got it all over myself trying to pick it up.” We’ve had some uneven weeks here. Kathy is trying to recoup and that’s been a slow, slow process. I’ve always done the bulk of the heavy lifting around the house (because I’m mental) but these last few weeks... ...it’s been EVERYTHING! Which has been all right. Doesn’t bother me much... ...but pressure has been on. By Friday I could see the end of the week on the horizon. A time to take a deep breath. All my shit together. “Damn! My knee hurts.” I went up some stairs. Sounded like I was walking in leaves. The particular knee in question has been operated on twice. I know what a torn meniscus feels like. Went to work. Was still able to climb around, but the pain was becoming more constant. “You gotta’ fix it,” Kathy said. “Nope. Not now.” So, whatever. You can get

It’s pretty crazy when you look at the difference between the Astros players at home and on the road. Seems that a half dozen of them are much better hitters in Texas. And what’s aggravating about it is that I was sure that the Yankees were a better team in 2017... ...but they lost 4 games to 3. The Yankees lost all 4 games in Houston. It’s alleged that they used a camera to zero in on the catcher’s signs and then they flashed a signal to the hitter via whistling or banging on a garbage can! And sign-stealing has always been a game within a game but the feed into the dugout and watching it on television and then telling a batter when a fastball is coming... ...is way over the line. It’s cheating. And it was a huge deal within the organization... ...coaches were in on it. ...manager had to be in on it. All the players. It angers me. Baseball is my favorite sport, by far, and while it’s not perfect, there needs to be some harsh penalties handed out here. The

Donald Trump Jr. is an idiot compared to his father... ...which is saying a lot because his father is an idiot. And I guess, I’m Triggered but Idiot Jr. has the number 1 book on the New York Times best seller list. I haven’t read it and wouldn’t read it for three million dollars. Cause he’s an idiot. I know that I have written 20 books better than that one and I have only put out 13 of them. I have 7 books on the scrap heap that are better than that garbage. So, how may you ask did he arrive at #1 when my books are nowhere to be found on such a list. The explanation is simple: All roads lead to Putin! A Russian oligarch purchased 70,000 copies. I’m not kidding!! How much more clear does it have to be before some of the people who defend these criminals figure out that Russia owns them. Our government has been sold!! Donny Jr. can’t write. The 70,000 copies at, what $20 a pop, is a way for Russians to launder their money. Right out in the open!! And he

I was 7-years-old when Nixon resigned. At 7, I knew that what was happening was straight-up crazy! “Are we gonna’ be all right?” I asked Dad. “I don’t know,” he confessed. Cut to yesterday, and day one of the impeachment inquiry. We heard from a couple of career diplomats who were sounding the alarm about a president who isn’t just unsure about right and wrong. We also heard from Nunes and Gym Jordan... ...two guys who brought up Clinton and Steele and Soros and a defense that has a lot of holes in it. I was in and out of the car, listening to as much as I could stomach. Absolute lawlessness was being bandied about. “How’s that impeachment thingy going?” A construction guy asked. I laughed. It’s all being treated like some sort of entertainment. Whole lot of people have zero interest. My 19-year-old son who calls Trump, “Donny T” and insists: “He’s a good guy,” just to make me laugh... ...said: “Is it almost over so people can vote to give him 4 more y

All summer long I kept a golf ball in my driver’s side door. When I’d get agitated by work, I’d pick it up and use it as a stress ball, thinking, “5 days until I tee off...4 days left...2 days away!” It was all very comforting. We all knew the snow was coming on Monday. “8 to 10 inches,” the weatherman crowed. I fell asleep at my normal time. Woke up a few hours later and looked out the window. My alarm was set for a full hour before I’d normally get up. I woke a half-hour before that. Then all hell broke loose. Melky needs to make a direct beeline from bed to backyard or she’ll have an accident. She also struggles to get up these days. So, I headed out to the car and started clearing the snow. “I’m freezing!” I yelled. “This sucks!!” Ran back into the house... ...and poor Melky was standing there. She hadn’t made it, and was ashamed that I left her hanging. I let her out and she immediately cried to come back in. It was only 6:30 but I needed to get on th

A baby boomer is someone born between the years of 1946-1964. Lately, ‘boomer’ has been tossed around as a divisive term meant to denigrate that generation of people because they come off as all-knowing and because they’re blocking the next generation from... ...I don’t know what. And maybe the boomers deserve a bit of aggravation for forever bashing the millennials as being lazy or whatever. I’m technically a boomer! I was born in 1964. Now, here’s the thing: Every generation believes that the coming generation isn’t going to be worth a 💩 crap! There’s a musical gap. There’s a work ethic gap. There’s a real temptation to say, “Back in my day.” I seriously am doing my best to not be that way. I’m waaaaaaayyyyy behind on music. I will go to my grave believing that I lived through the golden age of music. Man, I’d look forward to Rolling Stone telling me who had new music coming. Rod Stewart, Bob Seger, Neil Young, Tom Petty, Bruce, The Cars, Boston, Rush, AC

I remember my Dad’s 60th birthday. I asked him if it was weird to realize that he was turning 60. “In my mind I still feel like I’m in my 30’s.” I know what he means now. I kinda’ feel that way... ...and age is just a number and all that, but. I saw a photo of me from high school. Someone had placed it on Facebook. I had a huge head of hair. Kinda’ like my boy Sam has now. I miss my hair. It started falling out and going grey when I was only in my 20’s. In my 30’s I asked the young girl who was cutting my hair if I’d be bald or grey. “It’ll be a good race,” she said. My Grandpa Clifford was bald. I figured I’d suffer the same fate, but I still have a little hair left. In fact, I want to get it cut this week. It seems unruly. Now, a haircut takes minutes. Then I make the poor girl shampoo my hair with the shampoo that makes my head tingle. I’d imagine that in a few years I’ll be shaving my own head. I’ll still feel 35... ...even though I’ll be headi

House was quiet, with the exception of the humming dishwasher. I was on one couch, with Melky beside me and Paris at my feet. My patient was on the other couch... ...suffering. The brace still on her neck but her feet and knees being the bigger problem as she is still healing from knee surgery too! “If you were a horse they’d have put you down,” I said. She laughed. “Are you looking around at the future?” She asked. “No one here, trying not to move and Netflix asking us if we’re really still watching after so many hours.” We were on a English show called ‘Red Rock’ that has about 7,000 short episodes. We’d been watching a large part of the past two days and we were only on episode 23. “We’ll still be watching this,” I said. I was doing a whole lot of things in the meantime... ...made roast beef, did the laundry, cleaned a little, was writing some notes in the phone, and of course, giving my elderly dogs a lot of my time. “Have we heard from the boys?” Kathy aske

Whenever I go to the McKinley Mall in Hamburg I remind whoever I am with: “I built this place.” It usually gets a laugh because I can’t build a cardboard 📦 box, but it’s kinda’ true. I was a union laborer on the job and I was assigned to be a carpenter’s assistant. It’s a long place! “Get me a hammer,” the carpenter said. “Where is it?” “Toolbox at the other end of the mall.” I made the walk there, grabbed the hammer 🔨 and walked back. “Go get me a screwdriver,” he said, when I handed over the 🔨 hammer. “I’m guessing it’s in the toolbox.” “Yep,” he said, 😂 laughing. Walked all the way back. What did I care? Except I stepped in concrete on the way. An entire crew of really Italian guys called me an idiot. Then there was the day they put me on the tamper. I couldn’t control it. Dropped it into a huge excavation. I called my laborer partner, Joe. “Dude, they’re going to kill you!” Joe and I jumped into the hole 🕳 and tried to lift a 500 pound unit ou

Man, I’m not good with customer service calls. It starts with a recorded voice asking you to enter your 15-digit account number. Then you know what the first question they ask you when you get a human? Yeah, your 15-digit account number. “Before we get started, what’s your mother’s maiden name?” “Schryver.” “What was the name of your first dog?” “How do YOU know that?” I asked. “Do you know it?” “Ricky.” “Okay, how can I help you?” I explain the problem. “I’m going to put you on hold for a moment.” The music comes on. The music keeps playing. And playing. And playing. “Okay, thank you for your patience. I spoke to my manager and I have to transfer you to an expert who can help you.” Before I can even answer... ...the music comes on. The music keeps playing. And playing. And playing. “Hi, who am I speaking with?” “Cliff.” “Can you give me your full name, please.” I do. “Do you have your 15-digit account number?” “Oh for f***s sake

When we were growing up there were a couple of things that would get us in trouble: Bad behavior And being a tattletale. My Dad wasn’t big on one kid telling on the other. He’d say: “What’re you, a stool pigeon?” Or worse, he’d call you ‘Valachi’. We understood ‘Valachi’ to be someone who ratted on a mob figure. So, I’ve always been a little shy about the Whistleblower program. I never knew anything about it until Russell Crowe played the whistleblower in the big tobacco film. Yet, I kinda’ understand that when someone blows the whistle, that anonymity is key. Donald Trump Jr., spilled the beans on Twitter. Which is ridiculous. There’s only one reason to name the guy: To bash him. It’s a little late because the story he told has been corroborated by everyone associated with the story and even the guy who supposedly committed the crime. And it’s a crime to be sure. It’s being masked as quid pro quo, but it sounds a lot more like extortion and bribery... .

I received a Facebook post that said, and I’m paraphrasing, that only a few people “get me” but the rest of my coworkers either think I’m angry, sarcastic or just an a-hole. I was with a couple of coworkers I like when I got the message and they both laughed. “That’s you.” And it is kinda’ surprising, but I can feel that vibe from some of my coworkers. They’re actually afraid to ask me something. They do see me as short-tempered or unapproachable. Which is the opposite of how I am. I just don’t have time for stupid questions and I’m focused on doing things right. My goal in life is to live the same day every day. But it brought me back to one of the best bosses I ever had. He was sarcastic, angry and could be a bit of an a-hole. I loved working with him. He was the boss who, during the lift of a 40,000 pound piece of equipment was asked: “Are you nervous?” He answered: “Stupid people get nervous.” I laughed. He was just trying to say that he was prepared.

“There was no quid pro quo!” Trump spent a couple of weeks saying that and tweeting it and making his band of idiots repeat it, but it didn’t work... ...cause there was demonstrable quid pro quo. So, he sent out a long rambling tweet on Monday that tried to set up his new defense. “So why if there was quid pro quo. I shouldn’t be impeached for it!” The talking heads can’t even spin it anymore. The taxes are going to make an appearance unless the Supreme Court plays criminal too. “I never said I had any money!” Will be the tweet after that is exposed. And, unfortunately, I’m bored with it, and I know I shouldn’t be. People need to stay outraged. The lowering the bar has been going on for at least 4 years now. The office of the president has been degraded. How we talk to one another has degenerated. Those who want to be racist have become emboldened. And all because people have become bored with it. I remember telling my buddy, about 10 days into this admini

First off, what a truly difficult operation Kathy had. There are moments when I feel so badly for her, and there’s not a whole lot I can do to help. There are also moments when I’m happy to be heading off to work. For her, as it would be for me, the worst part is sitting still for this long. She watches a lot of murder mystery shows and at this rate she’s going to have a working knowledge of every murder ever committed. I can’t actually take the ones with the narrator and the bad acting in the re-enactments. Yet, the rough part is that I’m also in charge of pretty much everything - Sam is also running around getting drinks and blankets but there have been a whole lot of times when I’ve just settled in... ...and I get the, “Hey, when you get up can you grab me a drink?” And I’ve stayed pretty patient because, like I said, she’s really trying to battle it. Hasn’t been able to sleep in the bed yet. Carrying her coffee cup to the couch from the kitchen is a chore... ...

I’ve known about Nationals pitcher Sean Doolittle for a long time. You see, before he was the closer of the Nationals World Series winning team, he was on the Oakland Athletics. Inexplicably, two of my three kids like the A’s. One of my kids, Jake, is very in tune with athletes who do good things with their money and time. Doolittle once purchased 900 tickets for an event and donated the tickets to an LGBTQ organization because he didn’t want there to be empty seats. Doolittle has been a talented, but outspoken member of every team he’s ever been on. He’s not shy either and just this week we learned that he has an autistic brother-in-law and he decided that he didn’t care to go to the celebration at the White House because he couldn’t “hang with a guy” who speaks as Donald Trump does. It’s a common theme. Half of the Red Sux didn’t go last year. The entire Golden State Warriors decided against attending. Athletes who have showed up have been handed fast-food. Doolittl

I didn’t actually believe that I wouldn’t hit another golf ball for awhile. Somehow I’d talked myself into believing that this was to be the year when it would stay warm all the way through. Then I heard it: A howling wind outside my bedroom window. Melky heard it too. She nosed up the shade and we both looked out. “Not good,” I said. It got worse. I headed to the convenience store for the paper and that howling wind was bitingly cold. “It’s gonna’ snow this week,” my friend the clerk said. “Not a blizzard or anything, but some.” “Thanks for the good news.” On the way back into the house I had to retrieve my garbage can. “How is it out?” Sam asked. I gave him a thumbs down. 👎 So that’s that with that. We are officially trapped in suckville. 30 days in November, 31 in December, 31 more in January, 28-putrid days in February and then half of March, at least. 140 days of the chill wind in the air. Darkness all around. My coat was just a windbreaker. It

I missed it. Actually, I made my daily trek by the grocery store and saw a bag of candy. I grabbed it just in case. The boys aren’t actually here much and they certainly aren’t putting costumes on and making the trip around the neighborhood, but it doesn’t appear that any of the little kids around here are either. Even if they do go, they don’t stop here... ...courtesy of Melky who can barely even make it to the door. But her reputation is what it is. She looks scary. I never truly cared for Halloween when it was fashionable to dress up. I was always too self-conscious. I dressed as a woman once, a pimp once, bought a Howard Stern costume, and had a couple of masks. Yet, there are a lot of people who really get excited for it. Jake went to a haunted house last night... ...made me laugh because when they were kids I sprung for all of us to go on a haunted hayride. A guy in a sheet jumped out and yelled ‘boo’ and we suddenly had 3 crying kids. I had to beg the guy