Thoughts of a Common Man

I have a job that can never be completed.  I could visit sites from now until the end of time and I’d still finish the day thinking: “There’s more I can do.” And so, a fair amount of anxiety can creep in from time to time and I hate the feeling that I should be doing something else somewhere else. I was listening to a baseball interview with former Royals player and manager, Clint Hurdle. He was talking about being around his family and he threw out a phrase: “I’ve learned to be where my feet are.” It’s a phrase that I’ve been thinking about since. Be present! Don’t let your mind drift to things you did in the past or what you need to do in the future. Be right where you are at any given moment. It’s helped me calm myself a bit over the last couple of days… …when I’ve felt the anxiety of where I should be I’ve simply thought: “Where are your feet right now?” And I’ve addressed the work that needed to be done in the moment, instead of being overwhelmed by what I’m not doing. I do think

Winds in excess of 50 mph to blow the snow around yesterday afternoon made it hard for me to get super excited about the opening day of baseball season, but I will certainly be fired up at 1:00 as the 27-Time World Champion Greatest Franchise in the history of organized American Sports. Let’s go Yankees! So tired of writing 27! NL East: The Mets have the highest payroll in the history of the sport - by a lot! - and I don’t think they’ll win their division. Braves. NL Central: The worst division in the sport - someone has to win it: Brewers NL West: The Dodgers have won it a lot of years in a row. That’s over. Padres Wild cards: Phillies & Mets & Dodgers National League Champions: Braves AL West: Trout and Ohtani are two of the best players in the sport. You’d think they could win a division title. Nope. Astros (cheaters) AL Central: Like the NL Central the AL Central stinks. Again, someone has to win it. White Sox AL East: Once the Yankees stop babying their pitchers they’ll ha

One of the GOP congressman said it out loud.  Tim Burchett was questioned about the latest mass shooting that left 3 more children and 3 adults dead in a Christian classroom. “We ain’t gonna fix it,” he said, as clear as day. He went on to say that there’s no easy answer - even though this is the one and only nation in the world where it regularly happens. It’s not the doors. It’s not that God isn’t allowed in school. It’s not the video games or the lack of family dinners. It’s not trans people or immigrants. It’s not mental health. Well, it’s a little about mental health in that we not only allow the mentally unstable to buy weapons of war… …we encourage it! The stories are all eerily similar. An unstable malcontent goes off the deep edge and decides that it’s all over for them. They walk into their gun dealership and load up. This woman had five guns that she bought legally all in a short period of time. And that’s it. “We ain’t gonna’ fix it.” So, save your breath. You’re going to n

Love is truly something. What we may fail to understand is how powerful an urge it is for all of God’s creation. We all crave love and sometimes the pain of love is too much to handle. I thought of all of this when I got home yesterday afternoon and was greeted at the door by Miller. He was going off! If he could speak he would’ve asked: “Where’s Ollie?” At least a hundred times. I fielded a work call a half an hour after I walked in the door and the guy asked: “What are you doing to that cat?” I laughed - “He misses the dog. Ollie needed surgery to fix a damaged saliva gland. Miller wants to know where the hell he is.” And then… …Ollie was carried in the house by Jake (who is like a worried mother). Miller ran right over to him. Licked his buddy. Stayed at his side as Ollie settled into his dog bed. It was pretty awesome. Pure love and adoration between a dog and a cat. It’s going to be a long couple of weeks around here. Ollie is going to be more awake tomorrow or the next day… …and

The NCAA tournament this year has been an absolute catastrophe for anyone who has done a bracket. I was done on day one, basically, and I had 3 freaking brackets! What’s worse is that it looks like A.J. Renaldo is going to win some money and my son Sam might as well. I’ll never hear the end of it! There are zero of the traditional powerhouses anywhere near the Final 4 and either San Diego State or Florida Atlantic or some such crap will be in the final game! That’s Madness. And we have a big day here because Ollie is undergoing surgery to repair a saliva gland that he damaged by eating a freaking stick. We had to play 3 rounds of football yesterday because he’s going to the injured list for a little while. Probably won’t slow him down much… …but leaping in the air and catching footballs will be frowned upon I’m sure. My nephew John has returned home and that alone will bring a level of sanity to Camp Clifford… …in fact, we need to shut it down for awhile as we make renovations for the

About a month ago my phone updated and the next day I received a notification about halfway through the day that exclaimed: “You can do it! Burn 250 more calories to meet your goal for the day.” I wanted to ask who the hell was in my phone. By the end of the day I received a congratulatory message that was a pat on the back for reaching my goal. We have been battling most days since then. “You can do it! Only 180 more calories to go!” Then when I wake up: “You did NOT meet your move ring goals for yesterday. Let’s do better today!” And it’s been a vicious cycle and lately the dude has been pissing me off. “You fell 80 calories short yesterday. Get off your lazy ass today, huh, Cliff?” And I don’t know who is setting the goals but midway through last week I had some BIG jobs. Up and down ladders. Over and under scaffolds. I was supposed to be considering some of the OSHA regulations that my contractor was abusing but instead: “Hey, move ring, asswipe, you getting this?” Turns out he was

What did I miss? Been a little preoccupied this week, and had a great time at the show, but man… …I also had to speak on Friday and I was hoarse, my back aches, and my feet are simply pain sticks at this point. There wasn’t an indictment, huh? Seems like the guy who was supposed to be indicted is spending a lot of time calling for mayhem and destruction. Which should also be a crime, no? Threatening violence against prosecution? Posing a photo of himself holding a baseball bat? It’s all fairly ridiculous at this point. There are many more possible indictments coming too. I will never understand the people who treat him as a god of sorts. I saw a group of Florida residents who were offering up prayers and referring to him as the savior of the country. Paying off a porn star? Where does that fall in Bible studies? Maybe we should all ignore him. Anyway, it’s now spring. One of the weather dudes mentioned that perhaps there was a winter weather advisory coming for next week. Is that even

For nearly 40 years I’ve been going to Springsteen shows. I’ve never once walked out and not believed that what I’d just seen was unbelievable. But man, Father Time is undefeated and I thought: “He’s 73. Has to slow down a little.” Not at all! One song after another. The band as great as they’ve ever been. Bruce just tossing away his guitar and playing another hit. I looked around a lot. So many smiles. Thousands of people on their feet dancing. There wasn’t anyone worried about ticket prices or politics or even sitting down! And the show’s message was simple: “Enjoy the moment.” And it was a relatively new song, ‘Ghosts’ with the chorus of: “I’m alive and I can feel the blood shiver in my bones. I’m alive!” Bruce singing and pumping his fist and smiling and dancing. My buddy Pops and his son Nathan were upgraded to amazing seats. My nephew John sang every line of every song and his smile was so wide. “That one gave me Bruce bumps,” he mentioned at one moment. And by 11:00, my voice wa

Been 7 years since the E-Street Band was here. Finally, tonight’s the night. And I’ve mentioned that it’s a special one for me as I’m going with my nephew and this will be his first Bruce show. It’s kind of like my Dad trying to explain how big New York City was before I got there. Or what it’s like to be a Dad. You can imagine those things but until they’re right there before you, you kind of temper your expectations. And I’m not concerned about him coming away disappointed. I’ve never left a Springsteen show and thought: “That wasn’t spectacular.” We’ll leave tired. Our backs will hurt. Our ears will be ringing. The smiles will seem permanent. And I’ve done some mental gymnastics to figure out my favorite show ever.  I’ve ranked them from 5 to 1. 5). Washington  - 2012 - Carrie called me and said she had a ticket. I flew down and spent the night with my sister - a beautiful night, a long show and a great venue. Turned around and flew home the next day. 4). Buffalo - 1984 - The first

My life changed on September 24, 1984. That was when I saw Bruce in concert for the first time. I was with my brother John and high school friends Tom and Kellie. Bruce was a force of energy back then - they played 30 songs and around midnight he asked if we wanted another song.  The answer was a resounding yes and he reminded us that we had to work tomorrow but it was our responsibility. The next day I was back at college and life just felt different. He brought us up, down and back up again. He spoke about living life right and being a decent human. His show was about inclusion. His interaction with Clarence showing us all that all were welcome and all were included and that no matter how sad life can get, there is hope. It was a feeling I would spend the next 40 years chasing. I’ve seen Springsteen in Baltimore, Washington, Cleveland, Rochester, Pittsburgh, Albany, Toronto, Saratoga Springs, Fenway Park, On Broadway, New Jersey, Long Island and of course, Buffalo a whole bunch of ti

10-year old kids back in the 1970’s didn’t have a lot of opportunities to buy new music. We listened to our favorite songs on tiny radios and the only records in our house back then were Sinatra and Dean Martin records. Rock and Roll was loud! And according to Dad the singers we liked had little talent and wouldn’t last. I liked ‘Born to Run’ but I was a Rolling Stones fan first and foremost until one afternoon I went over to my buddy Doug’s house. He had the new Springsteen record, ‘Darkness on the Edge of Town.’ Halfway through ‘Badlands’ the first song in the record, the Stones hold on number one was slipping. “Old man wanna’ be rich, rich man wanna’ be king, and the king ain’t satisfied until he rules everything.” He sang of spitting in the face of the Badlands. I was hooked. Me and Doug and Digger devoured that record. Over and over and over again. But the Bruce love didn’t become really real until I shared ‘Darkness’ and ‘The River’ records with my brothers and my buddy Tom. I ca

I have Springsteen seat covers in my car.  I’ve seen him live 34 times - #35 is coming this week. I do listen to his music mostly every day. So, as we head to the Thursday show I’m going to explain a little about why he’s been such a constant presence in my life. “Nobody Wins Unless Everybody Wins.” Bruce ended his ‘Born to Run’ video with that message - way back in the 80’s. I’d already known that to be his message. It meant a lot to me then and means a lot to me now. America is a country of great promise. It’s a promised land that speaks of an American dream that’s supposed to be there for the taking. Bruce has always written and sang about those on the fringes of those dreams. He was brought up in a close family with a Dad who struggled mightily with depression and bounced from job to job. He felt that pain, and wrote about it, brilliantly. He’s now a rich man. He still sings about the fringes. Brilliantly. Yet, his music has changed a lot through the years. In the 1970’s, he wrote

The last president is about to be arrested for the ‘paying off a prostitute with campaign money because you cheated with her while your wife was home with the newborn fraud’ that is such a common problem. “If they can come for me they can come for you!” He announced. Yeah. They should. If I lie and steal and commit fraud I should be stopped. It’s the way the world works. But the former guy wasn’t done. He announced that he’s being arrested on Tuesday and that Americans should take to the street to fight for him. Not sure how many will do that because the last group that took up his cause are in jail. But imagine knowing, or believing that you’re going to be arrested on Tuesday. “Sunday we’ll have pasta for dinner and catch a movie. Monday I have to work and I’m thinking of making meatloaf. Tuesday is up in the air, though, because that’s when they’re coming to arrest me.” Buddy of mine said that they should toy with him a little, sending a cop car by his home every half hour on Tuesday

I write stories about characters who struggle to overcome all sorts of crazy obstacles to move on and thrive. If I put together a character who has had to battle through as much as my beautiful wife has in the last four or five years… …well, the book would be panned as fairly unrealistic. There have been deaths of loved ones, physical therapy rehab stint after physical therapy rehab stint, and crazy pets and goofy kids. None of its been easy, but she has thrived… ..because her husband is nearly flawless. (That’s how I would write the story). Yet, a long time ago I did write a story about a marriage that I imagined. I was just a kid. I wrote that book because I didn’t have a lot of insight into marriage and I wanted to create a world where I was in a marriage. (Writers are weird). I learned something. Waldorf & Juli had an exciting start to their life together and then… …life happened to them over and over again. Waldorf has a moment of insight and he explains to his wife that he wa

A new thing I can do without. No matter where you go or what you do these days there’s a survey waiting for you when you’re done. I bought a bag of dog food yesterday after giving my membership phone number at the register.  I was asked if I wanted to print the receipt, have the receipt mailed to me or both. I just looked at the poor girl. “Just want to get home with the bag of chicken and rice kibble,” I said. “We have a small survey for you to fill out to save a dollar off your next purchase. Also, would you like to donate a dollar to help starving animals?” “I just bought a bag of food for a starving animal,” I said. “I don’t need the receipt.” On the ride home my phone chirped. It was a message from the pet store asking me to rate my experience at the store! They are not alone. Buying anything these days is a never-ending project into rating the cleanliness of the store down to the overall bibs the checkout dude was wearing. I don’t care! I opened the bag for Ollie and gave him a c

I’ve reached the point of the year where I’m officially done with winter. I played football with Ollie wearing gloves and a ski cap. That’s enough! The NCAA Tournament starts on Thursday and that will certainly bring some energy and Kathy’s birthday is Friday… …which will bring a bit of energy. But there is considerable worry here at Camp Clifford as the Springsteen Tour has ground to a halt! Three straight shows have been postponed due to illness and you don’t have to be Monk to figure out who is sick. They played without Nils and Steven and Soozie who had Covid early in the tour. They can fill the spot of nearly everyone in the band with the exception of Max or Bruce, and Max appeared on a show over the weekend. So, it’s Bruce! “Will he be okay for the Buffalo show?” My nephew Johnny asked. “I hope so,” I said, “Or we have bigger problems than just missing a show.” “Like what?” He asked. “Bruce is sick!” I said. “Oh yeah. That’s not good!” But life is all about hope, right? Here goes

 “People talk too much. People think too much. We are all village idiots too enamored by our shadows, oblivious to the setting sun.” That was a quote in the excellent series, ‘In Plain Sight’ that stars Mary McCormack. We watched the series in its entirety when it came out, and recently, we started watching it again. First, it’s amazing how much television we forget. We recalled the basic frame of the series, but individual episodes were as if we were watching them for the first time. And then Mary dropped that quote. I heard it clearly. Wow. ‘People talk too much’. I find that first sentence to be unbelievably true. Just mindless banter back and forth. I don’t exchange a whole lot of small talk. I hate talking on the phone. When someone tells me their problems my mind glosses over. Less words! ‘People think too much.’ I am guilty of that one for sure. I overthink everything and I spend too much time stuck to a schedule of my own making. ‘We are all village idiots enamored by our shado

The saying is, “Wakey, wakey, eggs and bakey.” Around here (because of the great show, ‘My Name is Earl’ we say: “Wakey, wakey, hands off snakey.” And through the years there have been reasons for not being able to sleep. When the kids were young, of course, I’d be up before work to watch cartoons with them. When there was a chance to rest on the weekends, up I would be watching ‘Barney’ or a cartoon with a rhino. He’d sing a song about feeling ‘Rhino-riffic.’ Kathy once famously called and how it was going: “Rhino-f***ing riffic,” I exclaimed. I don’t have much use for alarm clocks. I’m usually awake at the same time each day, and only set an alarm if I need to make a flight. Now I have another alarm: Miller. He knows what time I’m usually up and lately he’s been calling me a few minutes before I’m supposed to get moving. If he could talk he’d probably say: “Wakey, wakey, hands off snakey!” He goes off until I invite him up on the bed and say, “Good morning, Miller.” I bring this all

I’ve done a lot of OSHA 10-hours through the years. Way back, while sitting in such a class myself, I listened to a teacher who made the class fun and exciting. The old guy had a wonderful sense of humor and he told stories that had an impact. I decided to teach that way. And while doing so many classes I’ve worked out a script of sorts. I speak about the sad, sad stories through the years and I punctuate a lot of what I talk about by picking on myself. One of my greatest hits is about getting the kids pool down in the garage and how I had the choice of putting up a heavy extension ladder or using the short cut of jumping from a stepladder set on a picnic table. I went with the short cut. My wife stopped me just before I jumped by asking: “What in the f**k are in you doing, safety boy?”  Big laughs. Yet, I also speak about the impact of loss on families and how truly devastating a fall can be - even one that is only 6’ above the ground. I end each class by telling a story of a young ma

A few years ago I had lunch with the owner of a decent-sized company and he said: “Piece of advice for you. Have lunch by yourself in a restaurant every few weeks or so. It will get you away from work and allow you to breathe a little.” I decided that Thursday was the day for that. Been a crazy week. I stopped at a good Chinese place and was seated at a booth behind 3 older women. One of the women was in mid-story. “So, I was laying in bed. I never sleep more than 4 hours a night, so I prayed a little and then I drifted off. I was caught in that place between being asleep and awake and I swear to you, Jesus spoke to me.” I waited for the other two women to bust her chops about making such a statement but they were all sort of agreeing with her vision. “I’ve felt that too,” on woman said. “It’s possible if you’re open to His presence.” I just wanted to dip my egg roll into the awesome hot sauce and eat in silence, but I HAD to hear the end. What advice did Jesus give this woman? “Jesus

How embarrassing it would be if the entire world found out you are a complete fraud, right? I guess it would be for a normal person but if you make your living just saying whatever might make you the most money, you most likely don’t have much shame. Been thinking about Tucker Carlson for the last couple of days because he’s been in the news since his texts about Trump were made public. Like the other ‘talent’ on Fox, he knew that there wasn’t election fraud. Yet, night after night, he lied through his teeth and laughed like a maniac as he worked hard to rile up a crowd that wanted violence. His texts spoke of Trump and how much he hated the man even as he went on television and praised him. Now? He has tapes of the Capitol attack and he’s back at it… …lying through his teeth to further work up his insane followers. When people lie to me in life I kind of lose respect for them. I may check in on them from time-to-time, but I don’t have much use for them. Especially if they lie over and

Carrot’s birthday is today. Love my beautiful, brilliant sister and her wonderful, talented children. Also a big fan of David who is one funny guy. My sister has brought nothing but smiles to my face for years and years. She’s the best. Happy Birthday, Sis! And as her birthday passes we begin preparations for Kathy’s birthday which is on St. Patrick’s Day and falls on the second day of the NCAA Tourney… …which gets huge play here! Sam is the engine that drives the train around here. He’s been talking about the tournament since November, but he’s struggling mightily as this is the first year in a long while that ‘Nova isn’t good. I’m hoping they make it… …but I haven’t watched it much. Know what makes Sam happy? Boeheim is out after 47 years as coach at Syracuse. Sam couldn’t stand Boeheim. For me, I was a huge Syracuse fan in the 1980’s and they drove me crazy. I always kept an eye on them because I have some great friends in Syracuse and I liked to break their stones when ‘Cuse lost.

Learned that a high school classmate passed away suddenly. It shook me. Life around the house is all out of whack with Kathy’s rehab and I have a car down because my mechanic, evidently, knows less about bearings than I do. I can’t find my glasses. I lost them at a job where I was called in to investigate a fatal accident involving a guy I knew for a long time. I don’t know why he lost his life. So. I’m messed up a bit. You can’t take a guy who is all about routine and turn life into chaos. “You should take a breather,” a co-worker mentioned. “Ya’ think?” There’s only one thing on the horizon that may help me - I’m seeing my therapist at the arena with thousands of other of his fans on March 23rd. Bruce has his hands full that night! But man. A breather? From every damn thing? And life itself. Suck it up. And don’t answer the phone!

Watched the Chris Rock special on Netflix and it got me thinking about the Hollywood connections because he spoke about being slapped by Will Smith at the Oscar’s. I don’t know why I expected Rock to just play if all off and talk about how they were buddies and it wasn’t a big deal, but he took the exact opposite approach to it all. He wants nothing to do with Smith. He also dropped the mic on all of it and showed that there isn’t any coming back. Also, we watched ‘A Man Called Otto’ and I couldn’t help but think that I’ve always enjoyed Tom Hanks and how he is a hated man because he’s a liberal and there are crazy accusations about him. Seems like the nicest guy in the world. He became a poster boy for Hollywood being out of touch. And of course, they’re all entertainers and actors, and we can’t ever know them but I’ll pretty much watch any actor regardless of what they supposedly identify as politically. Jon Voight seems a tad off to me, but man he was great in Ray Donovan. I love ev

Was watching a movie today. Not sure what it was - we’ve been watching a lot of television during the hip rehab. Anyway, one of the characters faced an absolute tragedy, and in the moment of utter despair the character cried: “Why would God do this to me?” That’s the kind of statement that always drives me a little crazy. Another one that gets my goat is: “I spoke to God about it and He helped me decide.” Now, I have a very extensive, long, complicated relationship with faith. I spent years serving mass, reading the readings, studying the Bible, and getting hammered by nuns with ping-pong paddles, yardsticks and a disgusting bar of brown soap. I’ve prayed. I’ve fallen asleep while saying the rosary, and I’ve wondered - from time to time - why God appears to have a doll of me that he’s stabbing with needles… …but the character in the movie was wailing at God because someone drove a car into her car and killed her friend. “God didn’t do it!” I yelled. “The other dude driving the other ca

The weirdest story of the week has to be the Ron DeSantis bill that states that anyone in Florida who blogs about high-ranking government officials such as DeSantis must pay a fee or a tax of sorts. What? They’ve removed books from schools. They have a war going on against wokeness and critical race theory being taught… …which is a good thing because no one is teaching it… …and some of us have no clue what woke means. But this one kind of takes the case! Ron DeSantis, Ron DeSantis, Ron DeSantis. Will I be taxed for typing the name, or do I have to use the DeSanctimonius nickname that was gifted him by the leader of the Republican party who spends all his free time golfing and making up dumb nicknames? This is America, still, right? There can’t possibly be a tax associated with mentioning someone in a blog, can there? That’s what they’re worried about as lawmakers? And I don’t much care, one way or another. I don’t have a lot of good things to say about DeSantis or the workings of the F

Back in high school we learned of the holocaust and the cruelty and heartbreak of that sad, sad, sad moment in time. I recall, as a child of 15 or so, wondering: “Why didn’t the world rise up and stop it?” I also wondered: “How did so many people become so brain-washed that they would condone such evil?” And then, I roundly ignored the subject. For decades! I didn’t want to read about it, or watch movies about it. It was all simply too horrific to even fathom and so I took the cowards way out by pretending that my ignorance of it all would make it less real. That changed when I picked up the book: “Prisoner B-3087” I read the first five or six chapters in a state of shock. How could men treat other men in such a fashion? What brings about so much hatred? Then, my reading of the story slowed. I found that my heart and mind couldn’t take more than a chapter or so a week. So many died. Thousands and thousands more were tortured mercilessly. It’s hard for our brains to even imagine such to

My work days have been long. It’s training season and there has been a lot of action as it seems all contractors are flat out. The phone is ringing and the fact that the Bills are building a new home… …we don’t have the people to do it! And since things are all mine around the house… …I walk in and clean things and entertain the pets and feed people… …and we watch Modern Family reruns because Kathy has already seen everything because she can’t do much more than watch shows all day. Not that I’m complaining… …it’s a great show. “I had a dream about Claire,” I said the other day. “Her and Phil came over for dinner.” So, maybe we’ve watched too many episodes as of late. But things are looking up because February is over. I hate January, but I hate February even more. We at least have March Madness coming up. What the hell do I serve the Dunphys when they stop by for dinner?