Thoughts of a Common Man

“Western New York has the highest-rate of Covid in the state,” Kathy said. “Supposed to rain a lot tomorrow too. Ready to go back to work?” “Yes,” I said, immediately. The fact of the matter being that I’m really ready to go! I slept past 7:30 one morning! I haven’t done that in about 25 years.  I cooked a lot during this little break. All the Thanksgiving stuff, a pot of sauce, tacos. I hung with Paris (the dog) and Miller (the cat) and we continued to mourn our buddy, Melky. Paris was certainly down in the dumps. It’s strange, but she was really moping. So we gave her a few rides, she went for a walk, and had a few bones. It’s the only way through. We caught a few movies. The Ron Howard ‘Hillbilly Effegy’ and Mel Gibson as Santa in ‘Fatman.’ “He’s not a great guy,” Jake said when he saw Mel on the screen. “If we only watched movies, or listened to music from great guys all we’d listen to or see would have Bruce in it.” Jake laughed. The Bills won. They’re 8 up and 3 down and in first

The idea for the next book wasn’t mine. In fact, I have so much stuff in the vault right now that it crossed my mind to take a really long break from writing. Yet, I ran into possibly my oldest friend in September. Another buddy was there and the three of us began speaking about the softball team that was a huge part of our adolescence. “It’s too bad that we don’t know someone who could write that story,” my buddy said. I laughed. “Think about it, though. There was so much love, faith, togetherness, loss, and tragedy.” I made zero promises. I have a whole bunch of work going on. Yet, before that week was even out, I decided to see how it suited me. I wrote the first chapter.  Then set it aside until last week. When I wrote the second chapter.  “Hmmm.” I am now on Chapter 10. Writing it as though I’m reading it. As fast as I can type it. A couple of things are interesting and different about it.  I didn’t change any names. Went with the first name of every guy that was on that team that

 1). I nailed Thanksgiving dinner. For the first 45 years of my life we ate our Thanksgiving meal at Mom and Dad’s. Over the last 10 or so we have been at my brother’s home. This year, it was on me. I’ve made plenty of meals over the years, but was ready. Jim talked me through brine for the turkey and the stuffing that I craved. And I nailed it. “That’s a lot of work,” Kathy said. “Was fun.” “You’re weird.” 2). Trump is truly looking pathetic now. His team of expert lawyers has yet to make an argument - but through it all he has not wavered. He keeps saying that “soon” there will be mountains of evidence. It’s so pathetic. Then, he took a break from golf to talk to the troops - in the middle of the night for the troops - and they sat him behind a tiny desk that I first thought was a fake photo. Twitter did it’s thing and I’m sure that he was furious about it. Funny thing is, I don’t care. Just go. He wants credit for the sun coming up in the morning, wants zero blame. The entire act ha

We watched 2 seasons of the show A Typical about an autistic character who is coming of age - I highly recommend it! “I think you’re on the spectrum,” Kathy said, as we watched the main character, Sam, look through the notebooks he used to document every part of his day. “I do that, for sure,” I said.  “And the keeping of the schedule, to the minute?” “Organization is key!”  We watched a couple of more episodes and some of the frustrations felt by the autistic character were frustrations that I express on a daily, or weekly basis. “Do you see it?” Kathy asked. “The obsessions, the anger when timing is a little off.” “Yeah, yeah.” And, truth be told, I’m pretty sure that we all have a little touch of a lot of the mental instabilities. The autistic grow frustrated when things aren’t a certain way that they’ve planned out. (Me too). Precision and organization? Guilty. And the show is good in a number of respects. The most effective part of it is that it allows people who don’t normally un

Was having a rough go in the early part of the week. I was surrounded by thoughts of death at work (investigating an accident).  I was reminded of loss because when I woke up, my dog wasn’t there and when I got home, I missed how much she loved me and showed it in her greeting. And thinking about my Mom’s birthday and how both her birthday and her Thanksgiving are lost. I stopped by.  Stayed far away from her, but spoke to her for quite awhile. Mom has always been so positive. She was positive yesterday too. “It sucks, but it’ll end soon.” My heart sank when I said, “Wish I could give you a birthday kiss” and Mom said, “No, no kisses. I’m not getting this after sitting here all this time.” Then Jim reached out because my love of Thanksgiving stuffing is legendary. He sent me the recipe and a step-by-step direction (reminding me to wash my filthy hands).  I followed it perfectly and mixed it all expertly and I tried a bowl. “It’s great,” I told Jim, “but this ain’t good - I’m gonna’ wei

I started to get down about it early on during the work day on Tuesday. Actually sent my older sister a message.  “What can we do for Mom?” The virus is running rampant. We are all out and about with Covid in the air. I don’t want to get my mother sick, but to be alone for her birthday and then Thanksgiving? That’s sad. I went about my work day and then, just as I was ordering lunch, Mick Jagger’s voice filled the air. Call coming in: “Mom.” I stepped out of line and the guy asked me what I wanted to order. “Gotta’ take this.” She needed me to grab her a couple of things.  “Sure.” I mentioned how lousy it is that we won’t all be together for any celebrating this week. “That’s all right,” she said. “We can do it later. We have to stay healthy.” “Sorry about Melky,” she said. “That’s too bad.” There’s no doubt that my love of dogs came from Mom. She was the Whitney Houston of singing to every dog that we ever had. She also was the queen of giving her dogs about 10 or 12 names. Then we ta

CNN has a death count for the number of people who have died from COVID-19. Now they’re running a count of how many people who have died TODAY! I had the television on in the mid-day and the count was at 377. Couple of hours later it was around 660. I changed the channel. Thought about the impact of even a single lost life.  Ironically, I had a rough day as I had to interview employees who were onsite when one of their coworkers suffered a fatal accident. Not a good day. There was so much heartache and pain on display and every man there spoke about how they were crushed and may never be able to get over it. I also learned of a few more people that I’ve known... ...who died of Covid-19 away from their loved ones. And then I watched a family in Utah (where hospitals are filled to 91% capacity) yell that the whole damn thing is a “lot of shit” when they were ejected from a restaurant for not wearing a mask. “Every life is precious!” They scream on other issues... ...with this one it appe

Most of life exists in the area where things make sense. One plus one equals two. Yet, the excitement of life exists in the more abstract moments where one plus one equals three. Springsteen spoke of it in his Broadway Show, saying that it’s the magical moments where when things don’t seem to make sense... ...beauty shines through. Melky’s remarkable life came to an end yesterday and I spent the hours before trying to rationalize it. She was hurting. She had a wonderful life. She knew how much we all loved her. But one plus one doesn’t equal two in those situations. I couldn’t handle it for a few minutes and I kept thinking about how she’d cry when she put eyes on me when I got back from work, or how she cajoled and chided me into taking her for a ride or giving her more bones. One plus one equaled three and there was love between a dog and the members of the family. No one else was around. Despite knowing that she would no longer feel pain, I was shaken with grief knowing that she wou

My brother John is 57 years old today. Old bastard. I was flashed an image today of us on the swings, trying to fly high enough to flip the swing set. That was our goal. Some 53 years ago. There was the time we got a brand new television set. The Lakers were playing the Bucks - Wilt versus Kareem. We were both cheering for Wilt. That was 48 years ago. What a ride it’s been. We shared a couple of texts about Ali-Frazier - I remember watching those fights together in the late 70’s. We were both rooting for Frazier. That was 43 years ago. The Yankees, the Bruce shows, the beers, the weddings, the baseball, basketball games. “What’re you doing tomorrow?” I asked. “It’s 2020. Not much.” I know he’s having pasta and that it’ll be great. Wish that we could all get together. I wish him a great day, filled with some entertainment. We swung high in the air all those years ago. Didn’t flip the swing set (Thank God) But we tried. We love you, brother. Happy Birthday 🎂 

Today is the final day of a remarkable life. Melky Cabrera, Melkman, Melk-a-roo, Melkinator, Nater, Nate... ...has left Camp Clifford... ...and man, I’m really, really gonna’ miss her. But man, what a life! We rescued Melky from the SPCA - Tonawanda Branch and I can remember my kid’s faces when I said ‘okay’ to their request, but my first thought was: “A pit bull?” We’d heard so much about the breed, but Melky lived a life of peace. She patrolled the neighborhood from her perch in my bed... ...barking at anyone who moved on the street below. I started thinking about the rides. There was at least one a day for 14 years and 8 months. For a few years there we went for a morning ride and one after dinner. And the bones! My God! She ate a truckload of bones. Thousands of dollars worth. Yet, the last two weeks have been rough. Her body just flat-out broke down, and I couldn’t watch her suffer anymore. “I don’t really remember life without her being here,” Sam said. Matt came walking into the

I’m not sure that I’ve ever been more embarrassed for someone in my whole life. Check out Rudy Gulliani’s last 30 days. 1). He was duped by Sasha Baron Cohen for a movie. He laid down on a bed and attempted to “tuck his shirt in” when he thought he was scoring with a young girl. He used the shirt tuck as his defense and the world laughed at him. 2). Then he tried to book The Four Seasons in Philly to let the world know about all of the “cheating” going on during the election. Unbeknownst to this epic genius he had booked the Four Seasons Landscaping business and then in an amazing display of his stupidity he actually went through with the speech! So, you had a crazed man shouting conspiracy theories that were laughable in front of a filthy garage door covered with campaign posters. Next door to the landscaping business? A sex shop! 3). Good old Rudy was not done yet. After weeks of television appearances where he flashed his crazed eyes and screamed nonsensically, there was an announce

Back to bitching about the use of phrases in the media that drive me crazy. “We’re doing this out of an abundance of caution” is right at the top of my list these days. I also hate “on the planet” when someone is describing a person who is at the top of their field. “Right now, DeAndre Hopkins is catching the ball better than anyone on the planet.”  How do they know? I had a dog - Shadow - who was the greatest catcher of any ball. “There’s no there there,” really aggravates me...every freaking time! “It’s a nothing burger,” God Almighty that one makes my skin crawl! “Running it up a flagpole?”  And the thing about these phrases it’s that everyone uses them all over and over and over again. I don’t give Trump credit for much but one thing he does do well is come up with slogans. Most of them are lies but he says them enough times that sooner or later... ...everyone is repeating it. “The cure can’t be worse than the problem.” He said that so many times about Covid that sooner or later ev

I got the phone call from one of my clients. I appreciated the information, of course, to let me know that one of the men who I’d crossed paths with... ...had tested positive. I wondered about the rules. I’d been quite a ways away from that guy, but I had talked extensively with his work partner... ...who had shared a vehicle with patient #1. “Should I quarantine or go for a test?” I inquired. “Maybe see if the second guy tests positive,” I was told. So, what I did was worry, and I fell down the stairs and my knee was painful... ...so I stayed clear of everyone and waited for his test to come back. “Positive,” he said. Now there is no discussion. A test.  Quarantine until the results come in.  Pray that I don’t become part of the ever-growing stat line. And therein lies the difficulty of all of this. I’m certain that there are people out there who are finding out that they’ve come into contact with someone who has tested positive and has blown it off. I’m even more certain that there a

So, we’re watching the Bills game on Sunday. Just me and Kathy and two dogs and a cat. The Bills scored with 34 seconds left to take the lead, and Paris got into position in front of me.  Paris is the least demanding of all the animals - or kids in the house - she holds on as long as she can before needing to go out. “Hang on!” I said. Arizona had the ball and was approaching the 50. I only needed another minute because there was time for just one more play. Melky and Miller, sensing that they’d all be going out soon, also got into position. Arizona scored on a ‘Hail Mary.’ “Damn,” I said, and then got up. The entourage headed down the stairs. I was keeping a close eye on Melky because she moves so gingerly. She made it. I didn’t.  Failed to hit the last step. Face-planted! But even though my chin hit the floor, and so did my right elbow, that wasn’t the concern. I got sharp pain signals from both of my knees which had also hit hard. I must’ve made a noise because Kathy yelled out. “Wh

The dream of another bonus round of golf ended about mid-day Friday when I caught a glimpse of the weather report for Sunday. Heavy rains and high winds - 50 to 60 mph? That would result in some crazy drives. So, I had no reason to rush out of bed. Melky is still hanging around and was sound asleep next to me, Paris was on the floor, but Miller wasn’t in the chair he usually sleeps in. I woke about 6:30. Didn’t leave my bed until 8:30. Received news of a loss of an old friend due to Covid. Also, received a phone call from a client - one of the guys I’d talked with mid-week had tested positive. There’s heavy virus all around. Thought about dinner. Sauce was ready. Lasagna for a change. Listened to the wind howl. Animals had no interest in going out. Thanksgiving warnings are being posted. Stay home! It was a tough day to get fired up... ...but hey, the Bills were on! The entire mood of the people of Western New York went up considerably when the Bills scored a touchdown for a comeback v

I’m pretty confused by the backlash coming from the crowd of people who are angry about the election. There was a “million-man-march” on Saturday and that was confusing because the park said that there were 11,600 people in attendance- a tad short of a million. I don’t watch a lot of Fox News but every once in awhile I’ll catch a story... ...like a Tucker Carlson piece where he spoke about how America is still beautiful. The commenters ripped him to shreds... ...talking about how Fox bailed on the only man who could actually save this country. This is where I’m lost. How can Trump be seen as any sort of savior? 240,000 plus dead. Fox News is on the poo-poo list because they had the gall to call the election for the guy who got the most votes. “Fox News Sucks!” They were chanting as they approached the Supreme Court in the mid 11,000 man parade. Some of the men standing there were dressed head-to-toe in Trump garments as if he led the league in touchdowns and yardage... ... these people

When I was a young man I was highly competitive. Some may remember me as a poor sport even. We played a lot of baseball in my backyard and I would set the ground rules. I changed them from game to game. Then we entered the video game era and there was a whole new level of aggravation. My kids play now and I hear them yelling in their rooms at whoever they’re playing. I recognize their frustration because my brother Jeff owned me in all the video games... ...and when he would score on me he would punctuate it by yelling: “HE SHOOTS, HE SCORES!” I had a hundred and one excuses... ...none being more useful than: “There’s something wrong with my controller!” As I’m writing this I’m also thinking of my pal, Jeff Renaldo, who figured out a cheat code for SEGA Hockey ‘94. He would score anytime he wanted without even actually taking a shot. I still don’t know how he did it but I’d lose 7-4 and he’d finish with 7 goals and only 5 shots on goal. “You’re cheating!” I’d cry. The reaction to my ra

Monday morning, first site of the day: “Dude, I’m leaving,” the foreman said. “Leaving? It’s 7:30. Short day?” “Come here.” He walked me over to the back of his truck. Lifted up a covering. There was a huge, very dead deer back there. “Got him last night. Arrow to the heart.” “You killed him with a bow and arrow?” I asked.  I couldn’t look at the poor guy. “Yep. Perfect shot.” “Not for him.” He laughed. “You don’t hunt?” “If I tried to shoot something with a bow and arrow I’d be dead in the woods from a self-inflicted blow to my heart.” He laughed again. “Problem I have,” I said. “Was my Dad shot a deer and hung it in the garage. I opened the garage door and saw the poor guy hanging there and I was weeping for hours.” “Ahh,” he said. “You’re a p*ssy.” And I am. There’s no disputing it. If I see a mouse in the garage I’m not running out to buy traps.  I’m shooing it out the door. He hangs around long enough and I might name him and then sing songs to him. We looked a little longer at th

There was a great video of a professional golfer skipping a ball across a pond and actually getting a hole in one as the ball rolled across the green. Just amazing - check it out - I don’t know how to add it here. We may have one more outing to try and get one on our 4-some. Then again, we may golf all year long! The weather this week has been stunning. I have never hit a hole in one.  I could never get closer than I did though, and while I’ve told the story before... ...it was the day after my 25th class reunion. We stayed at the bar until 4 a.m., and I was scheduled to tee off at 10 a.m. - in Syracuse! I slept for 3 hours and then made the 2.5 hour drive. They were screaming for me at the tee and I was still pulling my shoes on when my turn came up. Par 3 - 155 yards - blind green. “I think you’re on,” my cart partner said. Then. “Whoa! You have a tap-in birdie.” Then. “Dude, it’s stuck between the flag and the cup.” Then we arrived. Walked up to find my ball on the lip of the cup. T

I often think about a single Saturday early in our marriage. My great mother-in-law, sensing that we were overwhelmed with battling 3 young kids.. ...took all of them! And in the middle of a Saturday afternoon, I laid on the couch and watched the Yankees play the Giants in a inter-league game (Bonds homered but the Yankees won). Sometimes it seems like that was the last quiet day ever.  “What’s going on tomorrow?” I have asked every day for the last 25 years. “Not much,” is the answer I usually get. “Does Sam work?” “Yes.” “When to when?” “12 to 8.” “Okay, what else?” “Nothing much.” “Does Jake work?” “Yes.” “When to when?” “8 to 4.” “Okay,” I say. “What about you?” “Nothing.” Half hour later, she’s putting her shoes on. “Where you going?” “Therapy. I didn’t tell you?” “I asked you if you had anything.” “Oh.” And that’s what my life has been like since Bonds hit that homer. I’m on an ever-lasting quest to find out what the hell is going on? And do you know when the best conversations h

The last time the Buffalo Bills were 7-2 was November 15, 1993. They actually lost that day to the Steelers 23-0 to fall from 7-1 to 7-2. It was in the middle of the 4th straight year that they went to the Super Bowl. We all know how those played out. Yet, back then, everyone knew that they were very good.  People around Buffalo wore shirts that said: “We’re back. Deal with it.” The people around the nation were actually sick of seeing the Bills in the super bowl. Imagine that. They’re 7-2 now. I don’t know if they’re any good. They looked great on Sunday. How have things changed since they were last 7-2? I wasn’t married back then. My week centered around who they were playing that week. I played a lot of Sega hockey, drank quite a bit of beer. I lived alone - unless you count my two birds - Bruce & Patti. I was certain that 1993 was finally the year that they brought it home. Josh Allen wasn’t yet born. I was 29 years old. And it’s funny, but I looked through the schedule from ‘9

On November 8th in Buffalo-Freaking-New York! And has anyone noticed that the Buffalo Bills are 7-2 for the first time since 1993... ...when they went to the Super Bowl. 2020 has appeared to be about six years long, but ever since the Springsteen record dropped on 10/23 things have been looking up. Unless you look at the Covid-19 numbers. The election mess disguised the fact that 100,000 new cases are there every single day. What do the next couple of months look like? The head of the Covid task force hasn’t been present on any of the calls for over a month. Then, in the middle of the wonderful summer-like day news broke that Alex Trebek lost his battle with cancer. I can’t even begin to name all the celebrities who have died in 2020. Yet, there was the sun. Not a cloud in the sky. Neighbors were raking leaves. I saw bikes moving down the street. Dogs outside. Someday soon there’s going to be a day that passes where we don’t have 12 BREAKING NEWS flashes. Th vile, hate-filled social me

“What a great damn day,” one of my boys texted. “America isn’t dead.” And it finally broke on Saturday morning, less than an hour after Trump tweeted about how he won “by a lot.” He was on his way to the golf course. I imagine he was on the 3rd hole when it became official. How fitting. I hope he got a triple-bogey. For my kids, your kids and the world as we know it... ...character does matter and eventually we needed to return to some semblance of decency. ‘Joey Bides’ as Sam called him (he called Trump ‘Donny T’) is a good man. That’s why he won. It’s that simple. And all policies and political positions aside that’s where I feel the relief. There will be less chaos, less division and less hate. There just will be. We need checks and balances. We need honesty and less lying. “America isn’t dead.” That’s good news. As Trump pulled into his golf club he was greeted by a woman with a sign. There were just two words on it: “Good Riddance.”

Over the last month or so, Melky has started to slide a bit. She’s 14 and a half years old and even though we believed that she’d be here forever... ...I left for a three-day trip wondering if she’d be here when I got back. When I called home I pretended to be interested in all the daily news but couldn’t wait to ask about Melky. “She’s lost a lot of weight and she’s struggling to sleep.” Damn. I don’t want her to suffer at all. I spent a few hours driving through Kansas and I have it plenty of thought. If this is it... ...well, it would be horrible, but... I got in the house around 10:00. The Melkster was fast asleep. Which was a sign because she usually would jump straight up. I shook her awake. And that 3-second moment was great. I could see how happy she was. During the day on Friday, she followed me. She ate a lot. Hung out in the backyard with Miller and Paris. “That’s so weird,” Sam said. “She doesn’t lift her head up when you’re gone. Now, she’s alive again.” It was a good day.

 It’s 73 degrees on November 5th. I’m driving through Emporia, Kansas. The sun is shining and the cruise control is set at better than 80. Not a lot to see. Nothing to hit out here. I switch from the election news to Apple Car Play and Barbara Streisand’s voice is suddenly in the car with me. “A Woman In Love” And I marvel at the beauty I can find in the middle of a flat, boring drive. I sing along, aware that every person I’ve ever met would make fun of me forever if they heard that. Then Judy Collins: “Both Sides Now” “There’s something gained and something lost in living every day”... ...catches my ear and holds me for a minute. My heart buoyed by the love in my life, but shattered by the love that has slipped away. “Drive Fast, Fall Hard” Bruce sings next. “Don’t worry about tomorrow and don’t mind the scars.” Life can be surprising. A Kansas highway on a warm day in November... ...singing myself hoarse to Streisand... ...as the divided nation fights.

What a weird day, huh? On election night, Trump had a lead in some places, as many knew he would because the votes that were mailed in weren’t counted. Thank God I wasn’t awake for the victory speech where he demanded they stop counting. Yet what followed was truly amazing. He demanded that they stop counting in states where he was ahead and he also demanded that they keep counting in places he was behind. He doesn’t even see the idiocy in that. And to be honest, I wasn’t all that nervous about it. I knew it was in the bag. But, now the trouble begins. He will never admit that he lost fair and square. God knows what he might do between now and January 20th. The incessant whining will be really tiresome... ...and yet... ...the sky was clearing. He sent out a few hate-filled tweets accusing the world of cheating... ...and I laughed. Because the end is near. I won’t have to care about any of their thoughts.  Ivanka, Jared, Eric, Barr, Melanoma... ...they’re all leaving our every day lives

One of the announcers on one of the shows said: “Isn’t this fun?” As he was talking about votes that hadn’t been counted yet. It honestly was fun when I was a kid. I remember watching the returns come in for Carter and Reagan wins. It felt like that America could survive no matter which side assumed power. People would still somehow work together. I shut it all down at 10:00 Eastern time. The media selling it like a football game. Entertainment! This isn’t entertaining for people who watched a loved one die to a virus that was denied, ignored and then finally belittled and dismissed because it was too hard. It’s not a game when you consider that there aren’t any checks or balances left. Announcers growing giddy about the possibilities of it all being so close that it’s tied up in court or susceptible to cheating. They’re talking voter suppression as if it’s a campaign technique. It’s cheating! We are broken. As I write this at ten eastern time I can’t be sure about who may win or who w

Isolation kills people. Living a life isolated from others can really mess with people’s minds. Ran into a work buddy yesterday. I remembered that his Dad was due for a complicated surgery.  His Dad is 88. “Hey, how’d your Pops make out?” I asked.  “Surgery went well,” the man said. “But, they sent him to rehab. We can’t see him. My Mom, who has been stuck to his hip for the last 66 years, can’t see him. It breaks my damn heart. He keeps calling me to ask us where we are.” I felt my heart sinking. “Dad has a little dementia and he can’t figure out why we aren’t visiting him, but they’re saying we can’t visit him for 14 days.” I thought about my Mom. She hasn’t been able to be with any more than one of us at a time. We’re all making every effort to engage her, but she doesn’t want to get sick.  We don’t want to be the one that brings virus to her door. That’s what aggravates me about not being unified enough... ...or smart enough... ...or compassionate enough... ...to bear down and beat

I am so tired of the lies. I hate lying liars who lie and no matter who you will cast your vote for Tuesday, or who you’ve already voted for, you must admit that Trump is the most consistent liar who has ever held that position. We aren’t ‘rounding the turn.’ That’s his most dangerous lie, but one lie after another is absolutely ridiculous. We deserve better. I am also pretty sick of people who are living paycheck to paycheck believing that having Trump there is good for them financially.  His policies are not helping you. He’s the first president since Hoover to have a negative in the jobs category. It wasn’t the greatest economy in the history of the world before Covid-19. In fact, we were heading for a recession and the tax break for the rich was crippling us. The greatest economy ever crap... ...was a lie. The fact that the economy further tanked because of the virus was also because of another lie. He knew what the virus could do to us. He lied and did nothing. He was trying to ke

Bruce has been making the rounds to talk about the number one record in the world, ‘Letter to You.’ He’s always so thoughtful, and the questions run the gamut. Stephen Colbert asked a good question about the three songs that made the record. Bruce wrote them when he was 22. “How did you find that voice again?” Colbert asked. “The car is full of all the people we’ve been in our lives,” Bruce said.  It was a simple statement but one that I’ve thought a lot about since he said it, and Bruce has a career where he can pull it off.  It struck me though that 16-year-old me is in the car with 56-year-old me. I get that. Who we are at any given age is made up of all of our past experiences and every once in awhile we can reach back into our bag of tricks and bring out the persons we were back then. The cocky brashness of the college years. The basic insecurities of starting a career. The writing I was doing at 30 as opposed to now. It’s all interesting to me. Pre-marriage me. College frat days