A Good Man

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Hanging around on the outskirts of the construction industry as I do on a daily basis often runs me smack dab into people who know the Fazzolari name.

The statements that begin with, "Do you have cousins in Gasport," is usually followed by a roll of the eyes.

The one's that start with, "Is your brother Jim?"

Are also met by the roll of the eyes and a few great stories.

But the one's that are most uncomfortable these days are from the old-timers.

"Is John your Dad?" someone asked me today.

Damn. It's not that I don't think of my Dad every day anyway, but when you aren't ready for it.

"Dad passed away last year," I said.

Saying it sucks. Thinking it sucks. Knowing it happened sucks.

"Ahhhh, no," the guy said. "That's too bad. Your Dad was a good man."

And that was it. A good man.

First off, yes he was. A really good man. A great man.

Secondly, isn't that all we aspire to be?

I thought of the weekend and having to teach Matt a lesson on life. I thought of my Dad and the way he used to let us know when things weren't quite as he thought they should be. In later years he was a little like George Costanza's father with the "Bah!" followed by the explanation.

All that was missing was him yelling "Serenity Now! Serenity Now!"

In the growing up years, he guided us, let us make mistakes and then showed us he was watching, all with an eye on the prize ahead.

To make us good men.

So, today started with me sending Matt a simple text.

"Make good decisions."

We went back and forth for awhile and he was thrilled that I wasn't going to kill him for what was simply a mistake of youth.

I wanted to let him know that there is a huge picture out there ahead of the small lens he is seeing things through now.

I wanted to let him know that sometimes you only have one chance to make the right choice and that every once in awhile you have to rise above the anger, the impatience, and the stupidity.

How does one become a good man?

How do you achieve a lifetime stamp of such an understanding by someone who's life you may touch only in passing, from out on the fringes?

By being a good man.

That's how.

It isn't as easy as it sounds, now, is it?

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