Beat to Death with A Hammer

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The 48 Hours this week featured a woman who was beat to death by being struck with a hammer. They figured that she was hit 17 times.

"That's how I want to go," I said.

"With your mouth it's possible," my loving wife said.

We watch a lot of crime shows.

I'm not sure why.

Just seeing what humans do to other humans is mind-boggling, and of course, it's all about the people who are close to the victim.

They news programs usually play it the same way.

The surviving spouse will be on screen talking about how it was love at first sight. We see the wedding photos, the smiling faces...

...Life at its finest.

(Go to commercial).

The narrator tells us about how the marriage may not have been as perfect as friends believed.

The surviving spouse will say:

"I had an affair, but we were working it out. I had been forgiven completely!"

The evidence piles up.

The restaurant bills, the motel receipts, the loud arguments, and then the declaration:

"If someone kills me, it was my spouse."

At this point I'll yell out:

"Ah-ha!"

(Go to commercial).

The narrator tells us about other people who might've wanted her/him dead.

Now we have a real mystery!!!

"You think the husband/wife did it?" Kathy will ask.

"Yep!"

"Why?" She'll ask.

"Because they were married, duh!"

(Go to commercial).

The narrator tells us that we have a stunning break.

The spouse is back.

Crying.

There are twists and turns.

(Back to the wedding photos).

The new evidence shows that husband/wife may indeed have done it.

And then we get to the courtroom.

(Go to commercial).

That's when I fall asleep most weeks.

The next morning I ask:

"Did the husband/wife do it?"

"Yep!"

17 times in the back of the head with a hammer!

Didn't see that coming on the old wedding day, did you?

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