The seats are small on Delta Airlines.
I'm not small.
I'm also beginning to understand that there are people who are a lot bigger than me...
It's the luck of the draw!
I wasn't lucky on Monday.
And it makes you think of the song about sometimes being the windshield and sometimes being the bug.
Let's go through my day.
I took my seat, big guy, really big guy is coming down the aisle (not here, I'm thinking). "Excuse me, I have that one," he says.
I couldn't read on the trip because I didn't have enough room to hold up the book. So I put my headphones on. They didn't work!
I sat like a statue and made it to Atlanta. My gate was close to where we landed! I got a water, opened my book, (a half hour to relax). I glanced up at the screen: "Minneapolis" said the sign.
"Isn't this the Kansas City gate?" I asked.
"That gate has been changed to C32."
I was at A3.
I made the 5 mile walk. Boarded the plane, tight seat, an even bigger human came down the aisle.
"Not here," I thought.
"Excuse me," she said.
"It's only an hour and a half," I told myself.
She proceeded to break wind...at least 7 times on the way to KC...I couldn't prove it was her...but trust me.
I rented the car.
5 miles into my trip to the first site I noticed that there was a little triangle flashing:
"Low air pressure."
2 minutes later I was on the side of the road with a Missouri cop, waiting on AAA.
16 hours after waking up in Buffalo...
...4 states later...
I pulled into the hotel in Ankeny, Iowa.
I gave her my credit card.
"It says you have to call," she said.
I talked to the robot and then the credit card woman:
"We just wanted to be sure it was you, for security purposes," she said. "We're looking out for you. Losing your card would make for a bad day."
"Lady, you have no idea," I said.
Back home tonight!
Please pray for me.
So, Harvey Weinstein has shown us that Hollywood is sleazy, huh? Shocking! I immediately thought of the old Stones song that has the cho...
Was on a job in Smithfield, Rhode Island. I turned a corner and saw a Lull in the air. There wasn't anyone in the seat and the load wa...
It's weird, but from the time when you're a little kid you get these mental images about a state that you've never actually visi...
I didn't have a lot of relationships prior to marriage that lasted much longer than twenty days. So, to be sitting here twenty years i...