What A Weiner

-
I'm telling you, the members of congress and the various political representatives must have an awful lot of time on their hands.

Now we have a Democratic pervert being questioned about sending a photo of his, well, how to say this delicately, um...weiner to a 21 year old girl on Twitter.

Don't you think that if your name is Anthony Weiner that you'd send photos of anything other than your weiner as a gift to your followers?

I really don't get it. I don't. How does that enter your mind?

"Well, here I sit alone in my hotel room with nothing to do. I already called home to check on the family. What else can I possibly do?"

The respected rep flips through the television shows but little catches his fancy. He decides to update his Twitter account.

"Ah, I have a new follower. I'll ask her if I can follow her. She's hot. Why not?"

The girl is impressed that a congressman is interested and agrees to follow him.

"Wonderful!"

The congressman sits back. He has a new bill he can read, but his mind continues to drift to his new follower.

"I got an idea! I'll send her a shot of my weiner! Get it? Anthony Weiner's weiner! Won't that be funny?"

And now, of course, he is saying that he's been hacked. People will figure it out that this isn't true.

Then he said it was just a joke.

Oh! Ha, ha, that's really funny!

If you're ten years old

Or a Republican.

I don't know. I don't even have enough time to figure out how Twitter works. I certainly wouldn't be able to figure out how to wide angle lens my phone camera to get a shot of my Anthony Weiner.

(See how I slid that joke in?)

I'm thinking of running for something. It seems like there's an awful lot of downtime, and its such an interesting life when the whole world is crashing down on you because you can't control your own stupidity.

Just kills me that with a name like weiner, you choose to act like one.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Suits

-
Like a lot of other people we got pulled into the series, ‘Suits’ on Netflix. I’ve never had much fun hanging around lawyers who have questioned me as a construction safety officer. I once testified in a case where the opposing lawyer started questioning me by going through my educational background. “So,” he said, racing to a crescendo, “You graduated from college with a degree in Communications-Journalism and suddenly, 30 years later, you’re a ‘safety expert.’” He actually made the quotation marks with his fingers. I just looked at him. “How does that happen?” He bellowed, sure that he was going to discredit me. “Well,” I said. “I knew I was overqualified to become a lawyer.” The courtroom erupted in laughter. Even the judge chuckled. The rest of his questions landed flat. So, I wasn’t all that keen on a show about lawyers, but ‘Suits’ is great. Meghan Markle became a princess because of the show, and she is very good in it (and a beautiful woman). Yet, there is so much more. The wri
Read more

My Buddy, Dave

-
Way back in 1997, I started working with a steel erection company out of Syracuse. I was coming straight from a long stint with a steel erector here in Buffalo so I knew my stuff when it came to steel erection safety rules. On day one, I met with the safety director and he was just getting started as a safety guy, but man, he certainly cared about the guys he worked with. Dave was a good man from the start. He’d say things like: “You’re so full of beans.” Just a down to earth, hardworking guy who became a fast friend. We drove all around New York State setting up jobs. I always let Dave drive so that I could rest. One fine day, way up North of Syracuse, we passed a state trooper.  I glanced at the speedometer. “You’re screwed,” I said, and seconds later, the lights came on. Dave was beside himself.  The cop stopped by the window, grabbed the license and registration and headed back to his vehicle. “Here’s the thing,” I said. “You’re pissed, but you’re such a good guy that I bet you tha
Read more

Mom & Ollie

-
Image
 Ollie Stadium is a mess. The heavy rains rendered the backyard a mud pit and even though we threw in the side yard, the Big O was looking for more, and we were both covered in mud. I had to take some steam out of him somehow so I suggested we go visit Grandma. Ollie hates the car, but he laid quietly as we made the trip. We even brought the football because there is plenty of room to play at Grandma’s. Mom opened the door and started laughing. I thought about the love she had for every single dog we ever had. Oliver was quick to give my Mom a kiss, and then he stood beside her. The love between Mom and Dogs is a mutual bond. Through the years, Mom would make breakfast for the dogs.  Fried eggs, toast, bacon… She would wrap Christmas gifts for them. “To Jeter, Love Santa,” she would write on the cards. They played with the big chicken that made a lot of noise. Mom tossed the football and Ollie brought it back to her. As the visit drew to a close I headed for the door.  “C’mon, Oliver,”
Read more