Shaken

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Hatred.

It’s such a hard thing for me to understand because I simply don’t have any in my heart.

Certainly not for any group of people.

Definitely not over anything as mindless as the color of their skin.

I went grocery shopping yesterday at Tops.

I thought about it as I pulled into the parking lot. What would happen if the worst thing happened?

And it’s not quite so rare anymore.

There was a shooting at a church in Southern  California on Sunday. They’re saying it may have been a White Nationalist.

A couple of hours later, there was another masa shooting in Houston.

There will be more this summer.

Because there’s nothing to be done.

Not when half the government is gleeful of taking shots with everyone in the family holding assault weapons by the Christmas tree.

The gutless man who gunned down 10 innocent people here in Buffalo had been identified as someone with a troubling mental issue on his resume.

He bought 3 guns, legally, and was dressed like a World War II combatant.

Why would anyone, as a private citizen, need body armor?

Clearly, he was subjected to the hate and rage. He took it all in, as presented in prime time, processed it with a diseased mind, and destroyed lives.

He killed 10, but his wanton disregard for human life caused suffering in a close-knit community, in a usually friendly city, and across a troubled land.

I have a lot of conversations with people who count themselves as fans of Trump.

All of those conversations begin and end in hatred and rage.

There’s a lot of fear as well.

Misplaced rage about things that simply aren’t true.

Hatred of groups of people because of skin color, sexual orientation and just plain gender.

People they don’t know.

Over issues that don’t have anything to do with their lives.

Against abortion?

Don’t have one.

Don’t believe in gay relations?

Don’t be gay.

But what happened to the compassion?

Where in the hell is the love?

A dear friend texted me hours after the shooting:

“I have nothing left to say,” she said.

“Me neither,” I answered.

But I was no more than 3 thoughts away from thinking about the tragic event, all day long.

Hate and rage and fear is not a rallying cry for any political party…

…but it’s being packaged and sold as patriotism.

And that’s not what this country was built on.

It won’t save us.

And living in fear sucks.

All of it…

…sucks.

I hate it.



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