There’s So Much More

I’ve listened to my children tell me, in horrified voices, that someone they went to school with, killed himself.

I swear, there have been a number of suicides of youngsters, and it breaks my heart a little.

I think back to a buddy of mine who took his own life back about 20 years ago.

Norm was a big guy.

With a horrible back.

He had a couple of beautiful girls. His job was steady, but so was that pain. He could barely get out of a chair, and all attempts to get it fixed...

...didn’t work.

When he was able to move, he was great company.

We ate, and we laughed...

... a lot.

Then one morning I went into work and everyone was whispering.

“Where’s Norm?” I asked.

And they told me.

I still can’t believe it.

All these days later and I remember my first thought:

“Why didn’t he say something?”

It’s crazy to think that I might have helped him. I was fighting my own battles. I only saw a small part of his battle.

Yet, I still react the same way to such news.

“That didn’t have to happen!”

It’s my own lack of understanding that makes me think that.

There are so many people living in a spiral of hurt and pain. The news isn’t great. It can’t seem that we are all spiraling down and the continued fight seems pointless.

I love the simple beauty of life.

My dogs.

The laughter of my kids.

A golf ball heading towards the green.

A perfectly written sentence.

And I’ve lived long enough to know that you have to eat a whole lot of garbage to arrive at such a moment.

But there’s always hope.

It can come.

It will.

I might have told that to Norm if I had the chance but sadly I missed the signals.

Look up.

Look around.

Seems pointless, but it isn’t.

It’s life.

It’ll pass.