Can't Keep Up!

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The Oscars flub.

The transgender kid winning the wrestling title.

Kellyanne Conjob sitting on the White House couch like a 4-year-old.

Russia.

Crooked media!!!

Bomb threats on Jewish Centers.

Racist killings.

Immigrants being deported.

Repealing healthcare.

Fighting ISIS

Nerve gas assassinations.

I can't even keep up anymore!

Then we have the hourly tweets.

The paranoia.

That's all we know about winning!

I'm so tired of winning I can't believe it.

Even George W. chimed in and said that there's too much divisiveness.

But...

...the real story is the envelope and how Warren Beatty and Faye Dunaway couldn't figure out:

Best Actress:

Emma Stone in La La Land

Wasn't:

Best Picture:

Moonlight.

Or whatever the hell it was.

Personally I think it was a publicity stunt...

...or a result of a crooked media trying to steal the thunder from the Russian scandal because the transgender kid, who might've been an immigrant, tried to bomb a Jewish Center because the cabinet wasn't being filled fast enough because of Putin.

Bastards.

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