Thoughts of a Common Man

I'm starting to kind of like Iowa. When I first started coming here for work I would cringe at the long, boring drive from Kansas City to Ankeny. "Nothing but barns, 'Jesus loves you' signs and corn. I'm begging for a cow." But maybe it's the green, or passing an intersecting road and being able to see for 20 miles. Perhaps it's the laid-back attitude of the workers. Or maybe it's the loose meat. But the place has grown on me. And I had a fleeting thought yesterday as I passed by a beautiful field with an old solid barn on the property. "America is pretty great." Like anything else, life is about perception and how you feel at any given moment. There was a terrorist attack in Turkey. I don't really understand Brexit. The clown show presidential election is in full swing...but life looks okay just outside the window...in Iowa! One of the neat things about the area is that you can see the whole sky. The incoming storms...

Guess I'm going with old basketball war stories this week. Let's start by saying I loved playing that game. As a kid I practiced shooting every day. Even in the winter I would shovel off the court and go out and shoot. I have three boys who do that sort of thing now. Yet I should have also worked on dribbling...especially with my left hand... ...ah well...next life. Yet I played enough and was on teams through high school, in rec leagues in college and logged quite a bit of court time after college. I could shoot. I stunk at everything else. Yet the death of Pat Summitt made me think of women's basketball and my brush with that world. I was living in Baltimore and I had the sort of summer that movies are made about. I hung with great friends (and family) and went to O's games. We'd cook out by the pool and play tennis and hoops. Well...the lifeguard at the pool at the complex was a beautiful girl and we became fast friends. She'd beat me in t...

First off, I know the photo is sideways. Cause that's how the game went. North Collins High School brought in the players from the Buffalo Bills. I'm not sure who arranged the exhibition game, but I was honored to be asked to play... ...and we thought we could win! We had Chris Heinold and Big Wif! We could handle their size!! We also had a whole bunch of guys who were still playing rec-league ball on a regular basis. We were all less than 30 years old and we were deep! My buddy Chris sent me the photo yesterday and my mind immediately clicked to the first play of the game. Chris would most certainly win the tip and we would be ready. We sent my brother Jeff down the wing and his job was go nail the 3 and get the pro-Bills crowd on our side. I drew up the play and it worked perfectly. Chris tapped it to Joe who made a great pass to Jeff as he headed for the spot in the corner. A perfect air ball! Chris and I were laughing so hard that we had n...

Every so often there's a speech. After the speech there's this thing called "fact-checking." I always read those recaps. Trump made a speech the other day that was 90% inaccurate. 90%!!! During the recap there was a throw-away sentence that said: "We all know that all politicians lie." Why is that acceptable? And 90%??? Of course, that article could've been filled with lies too. Yet what is horrible about all of it is that people listen to those lies and then pass them off as truths. I plan on fact-checking Hillary too... ...who is mostly known for being dishonest. And you know what is even more dishonest than all of that is? The hypocrites who tweet out their "Thoughts and Prayers" after a mass shooting. If you're thinking and praying... ...do something!!! Any damn thing!! You don't think there's a gun problem than do something else! There's some kind of damn problem!! There is a mass murder ...

The major frustration of a really frustrating week was that I couldn't be where I needed to be on Friday afternoon and evening. I missed my buddy Emily's graduation party! Yet, there are some of the Cataldo's for you! It's funny, but I distinctly recall the first time I met John. His parents were visiting my parents back about 45 years ago. We played some sort of goofy game, running all around the big house on Shirley Road...and I told my brothers: "He's a good guy." During the crazy fun years immediately following college we all hung out and Mary was always my drinking partner. We all watched one another start our families. Just living. Great, fun living with lifelong friends. Cut to last July... ...I'm leaving the Stones concert when Emily shoots me a text about how great the show was. We talked Rock and Roll. We have talked politics. She saw Bruce and immediately understood the passion... ...and I'm fond of tellin...

Sam doesn't care for being included in the blogs because: "You make us sound wimpy." We all know it's because my kids are all a tad wimpy, but that's neither here nor there. It's Sam's 16th birthday! And did I tell you how tough he is???? He's a rough and tumble guy. Men fear him and women want to be near him! Yet, Sam has had a rough week on this, his birthday week because: Derrick Rose got traded from his favorite team, the Chicago Bulls to the New York Knicks But did Sam cry? Hell no! Cause he's tough!! He scares the hell out of me! I'll tell you that much. We all cower in fear when he enters a room! But Happy Birthday, boy. Despite how much you frighten me with your undeniable feats of strength, I must tell you that we all appreciate all you do around here... ...for all of us. For the dogs. You're a great kid and we're proud of you. Now... ...please don't beat me up! Tough guy. Happy Bir...

I see that the House Democrats are having a sit-in to protest the inaction on gun control. Not willing to get into that whole debate, but it seems to me that the sit-in isn't all that much different than the sit-ins that have been going on in congress, by House and Senate GOP since about shortly after the 2008 elections. There are just some signs for this one. There have been a whole lot of people doing a whole lot of sitting on their asses for a long time now. The Supreme Court judge died. "We ain't doing nothing!" They announced that! Perhaps we can take another 'Vote out Obamacare vote.' And whatever...it's our fault...we let them all get away with all of it! I'm here to talk about getting paid for a job where you basically are paid to sit there. I remember a buddy who took a job testing mattresses back in the day. Evidently they tested his brain as he relaxed. He got fired. He kept showing up in stages of intoxication and ...

I was just a youngster when I saw a severely broken-down, disheveled man walking along the streets where I grew up. By all accounts the man was a good enough guy, but he had a severe drinking problem and every day was spent in the pursuit of whatever he could drink. I'd often see that beat-up guy and even at ten or eleven years old I would think: He got one life and he blew it! Which may not have been completely fair, but I still think of that. Because every waking moment I have in my life is spent in the pursuit of not doing that! And yet you wonder. Is this all there is? Well... ...kind of! That's why there is an intensity to all I do. This intensity sort of infuriates people around me, every once in awhile! "You did that half-assed," I'll tell the boys. I had to get cortisone shots this week. Two sets of them. I had each procedure fairly early in the morning and my thought both times was: "How much work can I get done before this stif...

It's Jeff's birthday. There are just so many times, during the course of a normal day, when I will simply shake my head. Life cheated all of us of his presence. Just flat-out cheated! By life. And through it all, I have not been able to figure out how to lessen much of the pain of that. Yes. Life goes on. There isn't much of a choice. You just have to suck it all up... ...shake your damn head... ...and try to live your life to honor his life. Happy Birthday! I am really unclear about how I can celebrate, but I know one thing for sure: Celebrate is the word that personifies my brother. Jeff was a walking celebration. He treated a couple hundred days a year as if they were someone's birthday... ...and he loved with his whole heart. So. Raise a glass. Sing a song. Think of something that made me laugh. I'll do all of those things. And I'll celebrate Jeff's life. (Like I do every day).

Cleveland finally has a championship. They were partying hard and there will be a huge parade. But how does it change anyone's life? I love sports... ...I am a lot less interested in some aspects of it because of the money involved, because those guys are treated like royalty, and because going so ape-shit over these athletes is a little crazy when you think about it. Absolutely crazy! Yet, it is an amusing distraction. So what happens now? Cleveland fans go on social media and rip everyone else. Golden State fans will go on and bitch. LeBron's blocked shot will go down in history... ...and then he might walk as he is a free agent. If he does will Cleveland hate him again? I have a bunch of cut-aways from the NBA Finals: 1). I don't really love watching professional basketball. They travel. The officials can't possibly officiate the game without being abused. Some times they call a foul automatically when a guy heads to the basket. Other t...

I was wrong!!! Yep. I said it. Cleveland has their championship. Congrats to their fans. LeBron James is one of the greatest players ever. But I'm not wrong... ...without a battle. I still have to shoot off my BIG mouth, right? Well, Al DeCarlo, my nephew, Johnny and my college buddy, Tony Mullins... ...take heed in knowing that: You were right. Big mouth was wrong!!! But do I now like Floppy the Crybaby??? Not by a long shot! I do like LeBron though. And there's a difference. When he plays the game without whining and flopping all over the floor like a fish that you just pulled into the boat, he's special. I'll save you the description of him when he doesn't. And on Monday morning I woke to a text from my son, Jake, about "The Best Press Conference Ever!" I watched J.R. Smith...a guy I had wrongly dismissed as a 'bad guy' (not without reason) as he thanked his Mom and Dad, tearfully. Best press conference ...

I think of all the lessons learned, courtesy of my Dad... ...who was an exceptional guy. 1). Work hard. No one owes you a thing. I often think of this as I continue to get up and go into work. Dad was a huge fan of showing up. And shutting up. And listening. I earn my living in the construction business even though I can't put a cardboard box together. I went into that business primarily because that's where Dad was...and to work with him...was special. I watched how he ran a meeting with humor and sincerity. I still work that way...and when I use one of his lines...I smile. 2). Show your kids how to respect a woman. Mom and Dad had some epic moments, and last week Mom and me talked about 'how they never, ever fought.' Mom laughed. They battled to be sure...but we always knew that they were in it together. Dad guided us in that regard as well. 'Make sure you tell your mother 'Thank you,' he would say. 3). Be careful when dealing with others...

I'm glad that rocker Meat Loaf appears to be all right! I've always enjoyed his music and loved, loved, loved Bat Out of Hell 3. A couple of weeks ago I was walking through a job site and there was some hip-hop music on. The lyrics were horrific as I heard the N-word and the F-word about thirty times as I headed down the hallway. (Do I sound like a cranky old dude?) Well, I acted like one: "Turn that shit down!" I yelled. One of the young kids installing the drywall did so and said: "Sorry, SIR." "What's the name of that song, 'F$&k You?" I asked. The kid laughed. "It is a little rough." We chatted a moment. I asked him to tell me the top 5 songs and name the artists. He started rattling off a couple and another kid joined him and added a couple more. "What happened to me?" I asked. "I've never heard any of the songs or heard any of the 'artists'. Cut to Friday: Classic ...

Years ago I was on a golf course in Tampa, Florida. I had, unfortunately, hit my ball close to the lake, but I was happy to have found it. I yelled to my buddy, Chris Miller, saying: "I found it!" "You better hit it quickly," he said and then he pointed to a spot just behind me. "You got company." I turned to see an alligator about 20' away. There wasn't a practice swing. I hammered my ball and ran. Chris was laughing. I was scared out of my mind! I also recall once asking my brother, Jeff if he knew the difference between a crocodile and an alligator. He said: "One will see you later" while the other will "see you in a little while." The devastating week continues. I can't even comprehend that poor family and their loss. A two-year old boy gets killed. The frantic father watched it happen. Of course, the blame game started. Were the parents negligent? Is the park to blame? Why was the kid tha...

After venting a little bit in yesterday's blog I spent a pretty peaceful day in the calm beauty of the New England states. They talk a little funny up here, and they definitely have a baseball problem (and most of the Buffalomorons) would believe a football problem... ...but there's beauty up here. (Not to mention chowdah and lobster rolls) ...especially a whole lot of beauty in Maine. I drove for three hours, looking at the green all around me. There are a whole bunch of glances that could be captured on post cards. And I barely thought about the ugly of the news across this great land. Will we ever figure anything out? As you can probably tell by yesterday's post I am pretty doubtful, but as I traveled Maine Route 1 I purposely considered all that has been great in my life. (It's a pretty good exercise to do such a thing). I first thought of singing to my dogs! Yep. Before the wife, kids, friends, siblings... ...before any of that. Because ...

I am really irritated. Really, really pissed off about the collective WE. What the hell is wrong with us???? 49 people suffer a violent death... ...and how do WE respond? By attacking each other on social media. I've been reading all the whining, arguing, stupid shit that we bring to light after every one of these horrific "tragedies". Well...here's some news for you!! WE SUCK!! Typing out: "Spoons don't make you fat, you libtard," doesn't help! Writing: "The 2nd amendment was for muskets!!" Doesn't further the argument. There shouldn't be an argument!!! There should be people, working in concert, trying to figure out how to figure it out! I saw one guy's post that said: "A Muslim walks into a gay bar and says 'Shots for Everyone!'" Then this guy writes: "Too soon? LOL!" What the hell is wrong with people??? People lost their lives. The ones who were there tha...

"You gotta' be kidding me," my buddy Jeff said. "What's wrong?" I asked. We were on the 4th hole of the golf course. I was just trying to get the legs, back and hip all working in concert. "Shooting in Orlando," he said. "I don't even want to know about it," my buddy John chimed in. "What else is happening?" And as sad as that is... ... it's as sad as it is. Are you shocked? Saddened , certainly... ...but not shocked . This is America in the 21st Century. We have decided that this is as good as it gets... ...just hope it isn't your city. And there was a moment when we all stood on the 12th green and looked back at the fairway where we had all dubbed our way up. None of us were in much of a mood after playing the challenging hole. But in the context of the shooting... ...playing with a barking back and numb feet... ...hanging with three great guys... I looked back and said: ...

My boy is 19 today. It is so hard to believe. But I was in the chair at the breast cancer race and he came running in... ...sweating profusely. "Twenty-eight minutes," He said. "I saw the huge clock in front of me and I challenged myself to make it before 10:30." Jake wins a lot of challenges. And I am as proud of him as I can be. He's funny. He's smart. He can play all the sports. He's passionate and I know how much he loves his mother, his brothers, his dogs and the fact that his life is right there for the taking. But most of all, I am thrilled to death that I enjoy the company of all my boys. You know, it's kind of funny, but when they were young I would always say: "The mule stops doing all the work when you all hit 18. You're on your own!" (I never actually meant it, but it sounds good). But now that my boys are all getting there...growing into adulthood... ...I'm struck by the fear that they w...

My boys don't much care for mornings on the weekends. On Friday night we were watching Floppy the Crybaby throw a big fit as he lost and I said: "How are you guys going to get up in the morning for the Breast Cancer Race?" "It's for Aunt Cor," Sam said. "We'll be ready to roll." And on Saturday morning I was still a bit concerned, but I heard the shower going... ...Sam was up. "What about Jake?" I called out. "Right here," he said. Wow! They love their Aunt and feeling good about helping out. The entire race sort of got on us quickly this year, but they were ready to go. Jake finished the run in just about 28 minutes. I, of course, spent that time with my legs between two chairs as I tried to chase some of the numbness from the work week, but I was proud of my boys. "Where's Sam?" I asked a sweating, panting Jake. "He says he's going to finish dead last this year." S...

With apologies to Gordie Howe... ...is anyone still watching the Stanley Cup Finals? The Sabres have been done playing for two months and the playoffs are still going on. I think its the Penguins (who everyone outside of Pittsburgh hates because of Cindy Crosby) and the Sharks (who are so anonymous that I wouldn't be able to name three of them if you held a gun to my head). And I'm a sports fan!!!! I wouldn't have missed a hockey game twenty years ago. I watched the Sabres play 82 games a year. I argued that hockey was the best game to watch live and that the hockey players were the most down-to-earth of all the big-time sports stars. What the hell happened? I'll break it down for you: 1). The game is boring now. There is way too much in the way of clutching and grabbing. No one has any idea what the stars look like. They don't market the league very well and their commish is a colossal bore. 2). It's very hard to score. The goalies ar...

Don't you love when love works out? Actually, "The future is as bright as Alaska's midnight sun." That's what the brilliant Mom said about the nuptials for those two crazy kids. And when Sarah Palin speaks, we all listen, right? Let's recap. Bristol and Dakota Meyer have certainly had their ups and downs. This, despite, the family values example of her mother (who may or may not have slept with an NBA Star while still married to her snowmobiling husband, who last we heard was still recuperating from his horrific snowmobile accident). I'm not making any of this crap up! Bristol did a tour where she spoke of family values and spoke of how important family is and how everything needs to be stable for a child. Along with Mom they lectured the American public on getting back to the days when family was the focal point of all that was right in America. Then she got pregnant. Then Bristol and Dakota had a child. Then they set a wedding date...

I'm supposed to be in New York today. My ticket for tonight's Yankees game won't be in my hand tonight. I'm not sure if anyone will be sitting in that seat. Of course, I'm a little disappointed. One of my long-term clients had me out the NYC a few weeks ago. I had a two hour speech out there in May and when I was done they asked me if I would do the same talk, to a different group, on June 9th. "Yeah...if you get me a ticket to a Yankees game," I said. They did! Then Tuesday morning they emailed me to tell me it was all postponed. I must admit that I almost cried. Anytime that you're on the verge of seeing the 27-Time World Champion Greatest Franchise in the History of Organized American Sports... ... You get excited! Plus they are playing the Angels. Trout and Pujols! But, alas, I have been on the road a lot lately. Being home for a full week was also quite appealing. I broke the news to my family. "You still have the ...

We live in a society where people fake outrage on nearly every subject imaginable. People become outraged over Chris Rock jokes, for crying out loud... ...and forget it when it comes to the political candidates. The candidate that you like may say racist things, or mishandle confidential emails, but the outrage isn't complete unless it's the person you hate. But there was true cause for outrage today. Dan Turner is an idiot. You know who he is? The father of Brock Turner...the Stanford swimmer who was found guilty of sexual assault. That man had the gall to write, in defense of his son, that the kid's future should not be ruined because of "Twenty Minutes of Action." Brock Turner was convicted of attacking an unconscious woman behind a dumpster. There was plenty of evidence that he had raped the woman... ...effectively changing her life forever. But Dan Turner is not alone as the idiot here. Because the judge bought it. Judge Aaron Pers...

...maybe you're just bloated." That's the hook for a new commercial that has been playing on Sirius Radio. Over and over and over again. And every single time I think: "How stupid!" But I don't turn it quickly enough and I hear the reasoning. "That spare tire you have hanging over your belt might simply be toxic sludge that you can easily get rid of if you just eat our powder." I'm picturing about a 600-pounder sitting there going: "I KNEW IT!!! I am really just a skinny guy trapped inside this shell of toxic sludge!" But, you know what? They will sell a ton of that stuff... ...whether it's toxic itself or not. Because they are preying upon people's fears. The commercial then goes on to say: "If your belly is getting too flat, too quickly, just take a little less of our miracle product." I know a few things about weight control. When I was a senior in college I took a weight management ...

So what do we all make of Johnny Depp and his young, now finished marriage? His wife, actress Amber Heard, filed the divorce papers with a beat-up face. She claims that the bruises came from Depp's cell phone. You can tell he's rich...I-phones aren't cheap. Tossing them around is risky. But the story gets worse. Heard claimed that she feared for her life and that Depp came close to smothering her with a pillow as well. All of it is obviously extremely disturbing. There is no reason...ever...to hit a woman. Period. And yet it is done all across this land on a daily basis. Whether Depp did what he is accused of doing is up for debate and it will be sorted out in all the rags and entertainment shows for the next year. Heard claims that their 15-month marriage was filled with fear. She also has asked for quite a bit of compensation for her pain. It always kills me when the expenses of the rich are put out in public for us peasants to see. Evidently Heard...

Muhammad Ali once said: "I wish people would love everybody else the way they love me. It would be a better world." He was certainly loved. He was also roundly hated for quite awhile...and even today...the day after his death...because he stood up for what he believed in and was the world's most famous objector to the Viet Nam war. "Impossible is just a word thrown around by small men who find it easier to live in the world they've been given than to explore the power they have to change it. Impossible is not a fact. It's an opinion. Impossible is potential. Impossible is temporary. Impossible is nothing." I grew up in the 1970's. It was impossible not to have an opinion on Ali. Impossible! That's a fact. Ali was on television all time time. He was the most famous man in the world. He boxed, he sang, he danced. He spoke about political things. He was a Muslim and he even changed his name. We still have plenty of bias about t...

I really admire Dan Rather. It blows my mind that he was on the scene for Kennedy's assassination and then proceeded to be front and center in our lives for years and years and years. I've heard him interviewed a number of times and have always found him fascinating. To think that he got railroaded out of his job, for doing his job, is shameful. He had his legacy battered because he tried to ask questions about George W's record with the military. Those questions still have not been answered. Yet Rather took the high road. A couple of days ago he stood up again and wrote a note about Donald Trump going off on the hateful media... ...because they asked questions about the money that he pledged for veterans. A couple of things here: 1). The Donald said he wanted to give the money without fanfare, but he was the one who announced his gift, tweeted about it, bragged about it in stump speeches and then... ...didn't actually deliver it. Until the media h...

Took me a little while to process the death of the silverback gorilla Harambe at the Zoo. (And to those who cry that there's not enough time to worry about a 'stupid gorilla' when we have ISIS to worry about...get over it...some people can consider two stories at once). Listen, it's a sad story. I work in a field where tragic things happen even though there are a million safeguards. The zoo enclosure was up to code. I'm not a huge fan of humans enclosing animals that belong in the wild, but there is a zoo in every city. How are we going to stop that? Should the parents have been watching the kid better? Well, of course, but Seattle should've run the ball in from the one as well... ...Monday morning quarterbacking is easy. Perhaps they were good parents who had a moment of weakness. Should their lives be ruined over it? Could they have shot a tranquilizer dart instead? Listen to those who work with the animals... ...the dart may have agita...

There will be pork chops... ... Uncle Jim! Plenty of pork chops!! And I know the calls are coming. From all the members of my family and I'm including Pops... ...who will check in first, I imagine. And although I don't drink at all anymore... ...I will also raise a Miller Light today for Uncle Jim. You know, it's funny, but life is certainly all about minutes to memories and I have to tell the story of Uncle Jim eating with us on one quiet summer Saturday afternoon on June the 2 . Jeff had lost the annual football bet. "I'm not buying dinner out," he told me. "I'm cooking it instead." I didn't have any problem with that. He was the best chef in town anyway. "Millie is stopping by too and I called Uncle Jim." I didn't have a problem with that either. Chris Miller is one of my long-time friends and any time that Uncle Jim was there the party was better. Jeff served a beef tenderloin that was stuffed ...

I see this written every so often and always read it through to the end... ...it's a pretty good list to live by. It's not easy! Small Stuff Live beneath your means Return everything you borrow Stop blaming other people. Admit when you've made a mistake. Give clothes you don't wear to charity. Do something nice, try not to get caught. Listen more and talk less. Every day take a 30-minute walk Strive for excellence, not perfection. Be on time. Don't make excuses. Don't argue. Get organized. Be kind to people. Be kind to unkind people. Let someone cut ahead of you in line. Take time to be alone. Cultivate good manners. Be humble. Realize and accept that life is unfair. Know when to keep your mouth shut. Go an entire day without criticizing anyone. Learn from the past, plan for the future, live in the present. Don't sweat the small stuff. It's all small stuff.