X-Ray Vision

-
When I was a kid I remember asking my brothers if they'd rather be invisible or have X-ray vision.

I wished to be invisible because you could go anywhere you pleased, mess with people, take a bit of cash from the bank when you were short, eat things off other people's plates - ah, you can see the advantages.

I remember my brother saying that he'd rather have X-ray vision because he could look through women's clothes and see what's doing.

Well, my sources tell me that all you need for that particular super power is to become a working member of the TSA.

Yes, there will be X-ray machines installed at Kennedy and LaGuardia, and that the images they show are of the nude variety. The TSA member will glance at it on his computer screen, and finding no threat, will immediately delete the image.

Uh, yeah,right!

Now its not the images that they will certainly save in a secret folder - images of models and beauty queens - that concerns me. (Honestly, you're a TSA agent and Jessica Alba comes through - are you going to go, um,no weapons there...delete?)

I thought not.

No, the images that bug me are the ones of the gruesome looking people who come through that may be saved and posted on the 'net as a joke.

Have you been to your local amusement park lately? There are some big people, ugly people, and just plain strange looking people stuffed into bikini's, thongs, and tight-fitting clothes.

When your eyes drift to them,you're thankful for the small bit of clothes. The TSA agent won't have that luxury.

And he's going to save those pictures too. He'll use them to make fun of his buddies on his fantasy baseball league page, or to put other people's heads on them and hand them out at parties.

My other concern with this, of course, is that I may one day wind up in this saved batch of photos. I certainly won't go to the model pile.

Yet after reading the article, I felt a bit violated. Seriously, do you want some stranger looking at nude images of you as you cut through the X-ray?

Doesn't it sound a tad intrusive?

I'm going to file a petition. If they can have X-ray vision, we all should have it, or at least make us capable of being invisible.

I still haven't given up on my quest for a super power.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Suits

-
Like a lot of other people we got pulled into the series, ‘Suits’ on Netflix. I’ve never had much fun hanging around lawyers who have questioned me as a construction safety officer. I once testified in a case where the opposing lawyer started questioning me by going through my educational background. “So,” he said, racing to a crescendo, “You graduated from college with a degree in Communications-Journalism and suddenly, 30 years later, you’re a ‘safety expert.’” He actually made the quotation marks with his fingers. I just looked at him. “How does that happen?” He bellowed, sure that he was going to discredit me. “Well,” I said. “I knew I was overqualified to become a lawyer.” The courtroom erupted in laughter. Even the judge chuckled. The rest of his questions landed flat. So, I wasn’t all that keen on a show about lawyers, but ‘Suits’ is great. Meghan Markle became a princess because of the show, and she is very good in it (and a beautiful woman). Yet, there is so much more. The wri
Read more

My Buddy, Dave

-
Way back in 1997, I started working with a steel erection company out of Syracuse. I was coming straight from a long stint with a steel erector here in Buffalo so I knew my stuff when it came to steel erection safety rules. On day one, I met with the safety director and he was just getting started as a safety guy, but man, he certainly cared about the guys he worked with. Dave was a good man from the start. He’d say things like: “You’re so full of beans.” Just a down to earth, hardworking guy who became a fast friend. We drove all around New York State setting up jobs. I always let Dave drive so that I could rest. One fine day, way up North of Syracuse, we passed a state trooper.  I glanced at the speedometer. “You’re screwed,” I said, and seconds later, the lights came on. Dave was beside himself.  The cop stopped by the window, grabbed the license and registration and headed back to his vehicle. “Here’s the thing,” I said. “You’re pissed, but you’re such a good guy that I bet you tha
Read more

Mom & Ollie

-
Image
 Ollie Stadium is a mess. The heavy rains rendered the backyard a mud pit and even though we threw in the side yard, the Big O was looking for more, and we were both covered in mud. I had to take some steam out of him somehow so I suggested we go visit Grandma. Ollie hates the car, but he laid quietly as we made the trip. We even brought the football because there is plenty of room to play at Grandma’s. Mom opened the door and started laughing. I thought about the love she had for every single dog we ever had. Oliver was quick to give my Mom a kiss, and then he stood beside her. The love between Mom and Dogs is a mutual bond. Through the years, Mom would make breakfast for the dogs.  Fried eggs, toast, bacon… She would wrap Christmas gifts for them. “To Jeter, Love Santa,” she would write on the cards. They played with the big chicken that made a lot of noise. Mom tossed the football and Ollie brought it back to her. As the visit drew to a close I headed for the door.  “C’mon, Oliver,”
Read more