Nice Work If You Can Get It
The details of Cheetah Woods divorce settlement hit the news today. It looks as if Elin will get a couple of homes, custody of the children and about $750 million for her troubles.
I don't know about you, but I sort of smiled when I saw that. Good for her. She's going to have a good time spending his cash, huh?
And what did she have to do for it?
Cheetah's the one who had to practice every day. He chipped and putted and chipped some more. He's won the 2nd most major tourneys of all-time, and has had to travel the world playing golf on the greatest courses in the world. Poor guy.
Elin spent a few years with him, popped out a couple of kids, and held down the fort as he slept with waitresses from Denny's, hotel receptionists, the next-door-neighbor, and the Russian lady with one leg. (Oh right, that was Tony Soprano).
Cheetah might have got her too.
I don't know. I smiled at the idea of her cashing that check because he was certainly a dirtbag who put her threw hell. He tarnished his name, but he also dragged hers through the mud, and spit all over his kids to boot.
But man, that's a ton of cabbage for being married, isn't it?
I remember laughing with Howard Stern who paid his wife a big sum as well. He complained a little about it saying that his wife didn't do a lot to help him amass his fortune because she had gardeners, nanny's and an assistant for the last twenty years or so. Howard was only joking, but you can see his point.
Let's see: what would my wife get?
1).$749.999999 million less than Elin.
2). About 700 books that I read throughout our marriage.
3). The weed whacker
4). My collection of Yankee championship plaques.
5). The photo of me and Henry Winkler.
6). The shaft from the putter that I smashed over my golf cart last week
7). A few unsold books that I'll autograph for her if she'd like.
She might as well hang in there, huh?
I don't know about you, but I sort of smiled when I saw that. Good for her. She's going to have a good time spending his cash, huh?
And what did she have to do for it?
Cheetah's the one who had to practice every day. He chipped and putted and chipped some more. He's won the 2nd most major tourneys of all-time, and has had to travel the world playing golf on the greatest courses in the world. Poor guy.
Elin spent a few years with him, popped out a couple of kids, and held down the fort as he slept with waitresses from Denny's, hotel receptionists, the next-door-neighbor, and the Russian lady with one leg. (Oh right, that was Tony Soprano).
Cheetah might have got her too.
I don't know. I smiled at the idea of her cashing that check because he was certainly a dirtbag who put her threw hell. He tarnished his name, but he also dragged hers through the mud, and spit all over his kids to boot.
But man, that's a ton of cabbage for being married, isn't it?
I remember laughing with Howard Stern who paid his wife a big sum as well. He complained a little about it saying that his wife didn't do a lot to help him amass his fortune because she had gardeners, nanny's and an assistant for the last twenty years or so. Howard was only joking, but you can see his point.
Let's see: what would my wife get?
1).$749.999999 million less than Elin.
2). About 700 books that I read throughout our marriage.
3). The weed whacker
4). My collection of Yankee championship plaques.
5). The photo of me and Henry Winkler.
6). The shaft from the putter that I smashed over my golf cart last week
7). A few unsold books that I'll autograph for her if she'd like.
She might as well hang in there, huh?
Comments