I've Got Good News and Bad News
Don't you love the good news, bad news jokes?
I also love one particular joke:
Woman goes to the funeral parlor director: "I'm here to bury my husband."
The director says: "But I buried your husband two years ago."
The woman answers: "I got remarried."
The director says: "Oh Congratulations!"
My father came home with that joke about twenty years ago and I remember my mother saying: "I don't get it."
We told it to her a few times, and then she announced that it wasn't funny at all.
Mom was never much of a joke-teller, but if you ever get the chance ask her to do the impressions of a cat that was hit by the car. She'll laugh all the way through it.
My good news and bad news?
Good News: I am pretty sure that I escaped the knife with the Achillies. Ice, rest and a wonderful pain killer has helped immensely.
Bad News: I still am not real proficient at walking.
And man, what a gift it is to be able to walk. Yesterday, I stared at the long corridor of the hotel hallway and really wondered how I'd make it to the bank of elevators.
Suck it up and tough it out was playing in my mind, but I just kept thinking that I was about to cry.
And people look at you real funny when you're limping, gimping and half-hopping your way down the bunny trail.
"Looks painful," one guy said to me.
"Just trying out a new walk," I said. "You think it'll catch on?"
So, golf is out for Sunday, but thankfully, hopefully, it looks like I will be able to return to work, golf, and my usual animal-like gaunt in a lot less time then I thought.
It's funny how life works. Before being injured I complained about a lot of crap. Now I'm just thrilled that I'll be able to walk without the use of crutches.
I'm actually in a good mood because I survived the scare.
And I'll tell you something else: From here on in, I'm going to live life different. No more Grey Goose, or pasta, or steak the size of your head. No way. It's fruit, vegetables and good living for me.
(I can't even type that with a straight face).
Still, I almost feel like the woman who accepted congratulations on her second marriage.
I also love one particular joke:
Woman goes to the funeral parlor director: "I'm here to bury my husband."
The director says: "But I buried your husband two years ago."
The woman answers: "I got remarried."
The director says: "Oh Congratulations!"
My father came home with that joke about twenty years ago and I remember my mother saying: "I don't get it."
We told it to her a few times, and then she announced that it wasn't funny at all.
Mom was never much of a joke-teller, but if you ever get the chance ask her to do the impressions of a cat that was hit by the car. She'll laugh all the way through it.
My good news and bad news?
Good News: I am pretty sure that I escaped the knife with the Achillies. Ice, rest and a wonderful pain killer has helped immensely.
Bad News: I still am not real proficient at walking.
And man, what a gift it is to be able to walk. Yesterday, I stared at the long corridor of the hotel hallway and really wondered how I'd make it to the bank of elevators.
Suck it up and tough it out was playing in my mind, but I just kept thinking that I was about to cry.
And people look at you real funny when you're limping, gimping and half-hopping your way down the bunny trail.
"Looks painful," one guy said to me.
"Just trying out a new walk," I said. "You think it'll catch on?"
So, golf is out for Sunday, but thankfully, hopefully, it looks like I will be able to return to work, golf, and my usual animal-like gaunt in a lot less time then I thought.
It's funny how life works. Before being injured I complained about a lot of crap. Now I'm just thrilled that I'll be able to walk without the use of crutches.
I'm actually in a good mood because I survived the scare.
And I'll tell you something else: From here on in, I'm going to live life different. No more Grey Goose, or pasta, or steak the size of your head. No way. It's fruit, vegetables and good living for me.
(I can't even type that with a straight face).
Still, I almost feel like the woman who accepted congratulations on her second marriage.
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