So I Lied...

-
... had to do another Tiger post - thanks for the material Karl...

1. Tiger's new movie is out: "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Hydrant".


2. The police asked Tiger's wife how many times she hit him. She said "I don't know exactly… but put me down for a 5."


3. Tiger Woods is so rich that he owns lots of expensive cars. Now he has a hole-in-one.

4. What's the difference between an SUV and a golf ball? Tiger can drive a ball 400 yards.

5. What were Tiger Woods and his wife doing out at 2:30 in the morning? They went clubbing.

6. Tiger Woods crashed into a fire hydrant and a tree. He couldn’t decide between a wood and an iron.

7. Phil Mickelson contacted Tiger's wife to pick up some tips on how to beat Tiger.

8. Tiger was a mailbox and a telephone pole short of his first "grand slam."

9. What does Tiger Woods have in common with a baby seal? They both got clubbed by Norwegians.

10. What’s the big deal ? He’s been driving into the trees for year.

11. Finally, Tiger has found an unplayable lie !

12. Ping just offered Elin Woods an endorsement contract pushing her own set of drivers. They are said to be named "Elin Woods… clubs you can beat Tiger with.”

Comments

Larry L said…
What about Jeter being SI man of the year? I expected you to bring that up.
04 December, 2009
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

My Buddy, Dave

-
Way back in 1997, I started working with a steel erection company out of Syracuse. I was coming straight from a long stint with a steel erector here in Buffalo so I knew my stuff when it came to steel erection safety rules. On day one, I met with the safety director and he was just getting started as a safety guy, but man, he certainly cared about the guys he worked with. Dave was a good man from the start. He’d say things like: “You’re so full of beans.” Just a down to earth, hardworking guy who became a fast friend. We drove all around New York State setting up jobs. I always let Dave drive so that I could rest. One fine day, way up North of Syracuse, we passed a state trooper.  I glanced at the speedometer. “You’re screwed,” I said, and seconds later, the lights came on. Dave was beside himself.  The cop stopped by the window, grabbed the license and registration and headed back to his vehicle. “Here’s the thing,” I said. “You’re pissed, but you’re such a good guy that I be...
Read more

Mom & Ollie

-
Image
 Ollie Stadium is a mess. The heavy rains rendered the backyard a mud pit and even though we threw in the side yard, the Big O was looking for more, and we were both covered in mud. I had to take some steam out of him somehow so I suggested we go visit Grandma. Ollie hates the car, but he laid quietly as we made the trip. We even brought the football because there is plenty of room to play at Grandma’s. Mom opened the door and started laughing. I thought about the love she had for every single dog we ever had. Oliver was quick to give my Mom a kiss, and then he stood beside her. The love between Mom and Dogs is a mutual bond. Through the years, Mom would make breakfast for the dogs.  Fried eggs, toast, bacon… She would wrap Christmas gifts for them. “To Jeter, Love Santa,” she would write on the cards. They played with the big chicken that made a lot of noise. Mom tossed the football and Ollie brought it back to her. As the visit drew to a close I headed for the door.  “C...
Read more

Eyes on the Horizon

-
Image
My sister’s book is out there! Go get it!! It makes me so proud to see the book on Amazon, knowing that it’s very, very great! It’s been a long, long time since we were out in California, brainstorming my stories long before they were published. Carrie Lynn was writing, writing and writing some more through the years and I kept telling her… …”Go for it!” Well, she did!  To amazing results. Of course I was able to read the book as it was being put together, but I ordered a copy from Amazon yesterday and can’t wait to read it again. The shoe is on the other foot now as I have been sitting on a lot of my writing lately. I plan on getting it out there before the end of 2024, but for now: Carrie takes center stage! And it’s so great… …go get a copy!
Read more