Thoughts of a Common Man

I must admit that I had no desire to do anything this weekend. I was feeling particularly burnt out by Wednesday or Thursday and I made a conscious decision on Friday to do zero work for my actual job... ...over what I needed to be a quiet weekend. The weather was atrocious again so there wouldn’t be any temptation to look at the yard or garage. (The snow on Sunday morning was a brilliant addition). So, I sat down. And I read about some of my friends moving around the country (the Gags in Talledega), people out at restaurants, a buddy who’s kid went to prom... ...and I thought... “That’s okay. I’ve been everywhere.” I’ve swam in the Atlantic and the Pacific. I’ve been to about 40 States, seen the mountains and the valley floor... ...spent long periods of time in each place. “What’s going on today?” Kathy asked, as I settled in on late Saturday morning. “Nothing. Yankees on late, beef today, sauce tomorrow, Law & Order marathon, dogs are resting. Nothing!” An...

It started with a message from my Aunt Cheryl on Friday night: “Read The Big D! I couldn’t put it down. Read it straight through. It was great!” What an awesome way to start my weekend. Then I thought about Mark Knopfler and some Mellencamp lyrics. Kathy was watching Chicago Fire and the story wasn’t grabbing me... ...thought of Grapes of Wrath...the Tom Joad speech to his Mom. “Whenever a cop is beating a guy. Whenever you hear a new born baby cry. When there’s hatred in the air...look for me and I’ll be there...fighting for what’s right.” I went back to my current story... ...with a new story curling the corners of my mind. I mentioned to my Aunt that I had the entire story of The Big D in mind by the time I finished a three-hour drive. The entire book came to me in moments of clarity. The mood doesn’t always grab you as you live your life, but when it does... ...it’s better than everything else I’ve felt in all my days. “I have to write my thesis,” Sam said...

You have to hand it to the NFL... ...they know how to sell their product. Now there are some who may say that the game has slipped (I find it far less entertaining than it used to be), there are others who swore it off because the owners didn’t fire “the son-of-a-bitches”, and of course, they maim and destroy their own players... ...but they can sell it! There wasn’t a ball in play on Thursday or Friday, but man, everyone was talking about it! “Who the Bills gonna’ draft?” I made my kids put their choices down in stone. “Just get a QB,” Jake & Sam (and their friend Ben) said in unison. I needed more. “Not Jackson because he’s too similar to Tyrod’s style, and not Allen (‘cause he sucks) was the consensus. I made them narrow it down even more. “Rosen,” Sam said. “Rosen,” Jake added. “Definitely Rosen,” Ben finished. The Bills traded up. “Let’s go!” Sam squealed. “At with the 7th pick the Bills choose, Josh....Allen!” “NO!!!” Sam yelled. “Noooooooo...

There’s too much news! Cosby was found guilty, Golden Gate Killer arrested, Trump’s attorney is pleading the 5th, Congress won’t protect Mueller, Scott Pruitt and Sean Hannity are taking handouts, the NFL Draft, LeBron with a buzzer beater, North Korea, Trump and Marcon holding hands! What the hell is going on? Know what I’ve been doing? Ignoring it all!! Working and watching the 27-Time World Champion Greatest Franchise in the History of Organized American Sports go on a 6-game winning streak... ...and shuffling through the cold weather! I grew so weary of Donald that I just stopped listening to the news... ...I got it in small doses on Twitter. But let’s catch up: It’s a witch hunt!! That has resulted in the arrests of Manafort, Flynn, Gates, the Russians and now the lawyer. “He did very little work for me,” Trump announced. Why do I think that Kanye West is going to end up being the Secretary of State? And it isn’t really my way to stick my head in the sa...

First of all, I can't believe that 1993 was 25-years ago. Doesn't it seem like it was about twenty minutes ago? Ah well, I suppose that's how life goes... ...but I was reading a recap of a Buffalo Sabres playoff matchup against the Bruins from 1993 and it was one of those moments. (First off, that year, I went out with a buddy of mine and we would up drinking beers with Brad May. I actually didn't even realize it was Brad May until I introduced him to JC. He said, "Hey, Fuzzy, I'm not Barnaby, I'm Brad May!") Kind of funny. Anywhoha... A couple of months later, it was Sabres-Bruins and the Bruins were heavily favored in the first round. Buffalo won the first three games, however, and when Boston jumped out to a lead in Game 4...there was doubt creeping in. But Lafontaine and Mogilny were on that team and they struck fast. It was 5 to 5, and it was getting late. I was thinking about going to bed. And this is where time plays a tric...

I’ve been paying too much attention to politics, I guess. I have also had too many conversations with people who are supposed to be professionals... ...professionals in jobs that are considered honorable... And I’ve seen way too many people playing games with the truth. “Would you teach your children to tell the truth?” John Mellencamp sings in the chorus of one of his songs. “There have been extensive talks with North Korea about full denuclearization,” Sarah Huckabee Sanders said on Monday. She had to swear to that because over the weekend her boss tweeted it out. “That can’t be classified as anything other than a lie,” one of the talking heads said immediately after that. Don’t hold your breath on waiting for it to be retracted. I’ve had a number of conversations lately... ...work-related... ...with members of the justice system. The report I wrote was more than 10 years ago. I was deposed for my testimony more than 5 years ago. Now, I may have to remember ...

It hit me one day when I was in the storage room at out basement level. “This is out of hand.” We had accumulated so much junk, and each year, we have been piling more junk on top. It doesn’t help that my beautiful wife is a bit of a hoarder, and she accepts other people’s hands-me-down because she has a grand plan of using it somewhere. I don’t know where. Just goes into the room, or out to the garage. I then checked the garage. “We need a dumpster,” I said. I started by bagging up some of the clothes. I’m not kidding... ...we have every pair of shoes those kids have ever worn. Two or three bags a day for the entire week. I dropped them in Goodwill. Sam did most of the lifting as we loaded up some garbage. We now have a mountain of garbage in the garage. And only one day a month where we can actually ditch it. We also have a huge television that needs to go! It has been the centerpiece of the Sanford & Sons decoration style for the last 10 years. “I...

Poor Melky. She’s 12-years old. She thinks she’s 3. We finally saw a little sun, and got a break from the low temperatures. I went outside to look at how much garbage we have in the garage, and the dogs followed me out and were ha going in the back yard. An hour later, Melky couldn’t raise her head. She struggled all afternoon and evening, and I decided to let her stay downstairs instead of making her head to bed. “Keep an eye on her,” I told Sam. “If she wants to try and come up, let me know, I’ll come help you.” Twenty minutes later, Melky was in my bed. She couldn’t handle not sleeping near me. By 4 a.m., she was crying. I knew she had to go out. Neither of us was capable of me lugging her down 20 steps. I felt pretty helpless. Life wears you down. I imagined her running through the yard, trying to dig her way under the fence, chasing a squirrel. Time took those things away from her. “What are we going to do, buddy?” I asked. She picked her head up. ...

There’s a photo of George H.W. Bush, in a wheelchair, staring at the flower-covered coffin of his wife of 73 years. Seventy-three years! That’s amazing. And what a life they had together. They lost a child to leukemia. He fought in wars, became president, and their son, George W., also served as a president. That’s a full life. And of course, it’s the 73-years of togetherness that I’m focusing on. There probably aren’t many surprises left in a relationship that went on that long, right? Yet, as I know, having been married for awhile now, the marriage changes through the years. You can’t do the same things over and over because you change as people. Life circumstances change as well. Early on, the pages are blank. The endless possibilities of how it can all play out are there in front of you, and you have to settle in and figure out the roles. Throw kids into the mix, and it gets complicated, but you have to hold on to what put you in each other’s lives in the firs...

Southwest Flight 1380 nearly crashed to the ground and killed over 140 people. The fact that it did not is a testament to the efforts of those doing their jobs to the best of their abilities. The pilots and the crew did their very best to get the plane to the ground safely, but tragically a young woman lost her life. Jennifer Riordan was sitting near the window that broke, and she suffered blunt force trauma that killed her. The America part of it, for me, was about the people who jumped up and tried their very best to keep the wife and mother of two alive. They tried to keep her from leaving the plane, they tried to cover the hole, they attempted CPR for a long, long while once they could. In the writing of the blog, and in being a caring American over the last couple of years, I have been struck dumbfounded by the loss of civility, by the absolute nastiness, by the perceived racism... ...it’s easy to get down about all of it. Yet, there have been slivers of hope. I ...

I tell the story often because it’s one of the days in my life that I’ll never forget. In fact, when I consider it all, I am back in the store and I can still see the rage. There was a lot of rage. It was 1974 in Largo, Florida. The book I had my eye on was “Hammerin’ Hank.” The story of Henry Aaron, of course. Aaron was sitting at 713 homeruns that off-season and it only took him a week to beat Babe Ruth...and that was the problem. A lot of white men didn’t want to see Aaron become the homerun king (even though Aaron has proved to be the classiest guy in all of sports). The book was four dollars. It took me awhile to earn the money, but I finally did, so Mom took me over to the gas station/store and I was thrilled that the book was still there. I ran to the counter and handed it to Mom. Th man behind the counter looked at me, Mom and then the book. I was just nine years old, but I saw disgust on his face. I had no idea why he was mad. “Why would you let him buy a b...

When Comey announced that they were reopening the investigation into Clinton, 10 days before the election, it seemed like a setup. Seems more like one since we know that there was an investigation going on regarding Trump, but that one wasn’t announced! And Comey has been everywhere plugging his book, and bashing Trump, who is returning the favor. These are supposed to be adults! And I don’t know exactly what to think of Comey, but he could be a truthful guy... ...appears that way to me. As for Donald... ...he isn’t truthful, by any stretch of the imagination, and he doesn’t care. So, the one thing that Comey said on his ABC interview was that Trump is morally unfit to hold the highest office in the land... ...and that’s the single most sentence that I agree with. America is about family, living a good life, working hard, treating others with respect and telling the damn truth. Aren’t those the things we should try to do? Find one thing on that list that Trump d...

I must confess that I didn’t get any of the sauce on Sunday. I was hanging out, watching basketball with the boys (Floppy the Crybaby, LeBron got beat) when I started to feel a little queasy. I took a sip of water and immediately thought; “That’s not staying down!” I’ll spare you the details but over the next 14 hours... ...I barely finished 12 ounces of water. And it struck me that your health is all you really have. I went from a normal weekend to a laying down mess. I did watch an episode of Columbo where George Wendt was driven crazy enough to confess. Other than that... ...it was me and Melky in bed. “You won’t be at work tomorrow,” Sam said, at one point. “Who said?” I answered. And truth be told, I actually felt pretty well by the time 5 a.m. rolled around, and I was happy about that. Just a quick blast of something? We take our health for granted most of the time, but when it comes out of nowhere like that a whole bunch of worry runs through your min...

It took me a good ten minutes to chip the ice off my car on Sunday morning. It was kinda’ cool though because the ice covered everything, and chipping it away might’ve been fun had it not been about 25 degrees with sleet soaking me. “It’s April 15th!” I yelled. In less than 140 days we’re going to be putting stuff away for the winter! Yet, I wanted to try and make the best of it. I had some time to go through social media, and look at the baseball stats, even though the Yankees haven’t played in a little while. (If Boone rests any of the regulars this week after hardly playing, I may scream!) But there was sauce to be made! We’ve been doing meatballs and beef chunks a lot. It came to me in a dream. “RIBS!” But I was even more inspired than that. “Ravioli!” I actually started to get excited about it. We were under blankets in our usual spots on the couch. “It’s cold in here,” Kathy said. “And there’s nothing on television.” She settled for a movie on Life...

So, this was a humanitarian bombing of Syria because Asaad used chemical weapons on his own people, huh? Thank God we care for those poor people. We’re good! They’re bad!! This year, we allowed 11 refugees from that war torn area. Guess we aren’t THAT humanitarian. And I don’t know much about what is right and wrong. Evidently they were targeted attacks designed to minimize civilian death and targeting the areas where chemicals are stashed. Okay. Using gas on your own people is horrendous. Yet, there’s one thing I absolutely hate about such a strike. Those who revel in the power and feel empowered by military might. I often think about the people on the ground in the areas where those very expensive missiles hit. I saw one estimate that said that the missles that were deployed cost $240 million. “About time we have a strong leader!” One woman noted. “No red lines! Bomb the shot out of those people!! Turn it all into a parking lot!!! They’re all pigs anyway!!!” ...

My Aunt Rosalie passed away. She was my Dad’s oldest sister, and she died just shortly after her 90th birthday. I always considered my Aunt to be a classy lady. She was always ready with a kiss and a hearty laugh. She was a terrific Mom, wife and Grandma. Everything that makes a life well-lived. And still, as I said a prayer for her... ...I thought about her with My Dad, My Uncle Jim, My Aunt Carolyn and my Aunt Mary Lou... ...and how they’ve all passed on. I made it a point to say ‘Hello’ to my Aunt Franny... ...the last of the family. She wasn’t sad! “There’s a way to die,” Aunt Franny said. “She was alert, engaged in living, and happy all the way to the end.” I smiled at that, but I still felt some sadness... ...because I’d seen them all in the best of their days. And 90 years is a good, long life... ...but it’s still a short time... ...when time runs out. We talked about Dad and some of his greatest moments, and how much love there was between the si...

Here’s some breaking news for you. I don’t particularly care for Yankees-Red Sux matchups. It all started in the late 70’s. I hated Jim Rice and Bill Lee and really was pissed at Mike Torrez for going over there. When Bucky F***ing Dent put it over the wall... ...I thought it was pretty comical. In the 80’s, I hated Clemens and Boggs. Even when they came over to the Yankees in the 90’s, I never truly warmed to them. Yet, I used to hang with Red Sux fans and the back and forth was fun. It got ugly in the early 2000’s. I hated, really hated, Pedro and Manny and Ortiz. I still can’t stand the sight of them in uniform. Curt Schilling has to be asshole number 1 for me because of his mouth and the fake blood on his sock. Still galls me! And they finally won a few. I didn’t watch a pitch of any of the World Series games they played. Recently, the starch was out of the rivalry. Boston finished last a couple of times. That made me laugh. On Thursday, Tyler Austin...

Paul Ryan is retiring. I can’t  even look at him! Good riddance. “I haven’t seen that tweet,” is his go to answer when Trump embarrasses the hell out of the country. And he’s been completely missing. He grabbed all the money he could and now he’s quitting, along with 41 other GOP congressmen who are suddenly interested in their families. Family values. God. All the garbage was trotted out yesterday and he told the country how proud he is of all the fine, fine work he’s doing to benefit the hard-working men and women. I nearly threw up. Paul Ryan will go down as a spineless, thieving coward who sold his soul to the devil. “Grab them by the pu**y?” “There are good men on both sides.” “Mexicans are rapists.” “I like my soldiers not captured.” “You should see this guy.” (When making fun of the disabled reporter). And Ryan is “troubled”? He wasn’t “troubled” enough to condemn the rantings of a lunatic. He took the money and ran... ...and now he’s tell...

It’s been a long time since I was traveling down a road in Connecticut. Yet, there I was on 91 near Hartford and I thought, I’ve been here before. Thirty years ago... ...if my math is correct. And I thought about the year I spent there, living in West Haven, working on a job in New Haven, hanging out at Toad’s Place (the Yale College bar), running to New York for Yankees-Red Sux games, seeing the Stones walk off a bus... ...ten feet from me. Then I thought of my Dad. He was the one who got the job for me. We lived together for a couple of months, then he got homesick, quit, and left me there. Yet, before he left, we had dinner every night. He’d wake me up early on Saturday and Sunday because he wanted company. I recalled one Saturday morning when I’d tried to sleep past seven. He was at the kitchen table playing solitaire and I heard the cards being shuffled (he was a loud, prolonged shuffler). “Guess it’s MY turn to take the garbage to the dumpster,” he said, loud ...

I do listen to Tony Robbins now and again. He did a show on grief that was really great. He usually is on the right side of the tough subjects... ...he had a big swing and miss with his thoughts on the #Metoo discussion. Robbins spoke about a powerful guy who was interviewing for a job in his company and the choices were two men and a very attractive woman. He said that the woman was better suited for the position but that the powerful, wealthy guy didn’t hire her... ...cause it was too risky to have her around. I think he has it backwards, don’t you? The man is too afraid that he won’t be able to control himself? Or He thinks that all attractive women have an agenda to wipe out men? I work in an industry where attractive women are certainly open to some silliness, if not downright stupidity. I once worked with a young, very attractive woman who wanted to be a safety consultant. “They don’t take me seriously,” she said. “When I confront a group of them I get reque...

Some stories are too horrific to digest. The people who lost their lives in the horrific bus-semi crash in Canada is one of those stories. 15 people died in the crash that looked like a bomb strike. Most of those who died were teenagers. They were young hockey players, headed to a huge playoff game. Everyone is well aware of the love affair between Canada and hockey. I never knew how strong it was until I was in Toronto for a concert. The bathroom was full of Canadian men who were watching the second period of a Maple Leafs game. The Maple Leafs weren’t good. It was just a regular season game. They were glued to that television. “Man, these people love hockey,” I said. My friend, who attended the concert with me, educated me on the subject. “Everyone plays. They bring their children all over the country to play, from the time they’re little kids until they either make it to the NHL or not.” Much of what I read in the horrific details of the crash said as much. T...

On Wednesday I was trying my best to walk down Pearl Street in Buffalo. “Against the wind,” began playing in my head. The winds were about 60 mph. My forehead was numb. The snowflakes were making me look down at my feet. “Come on!” I yelled into the howling wind. We are now at April 8. (The day Henry Aaron passed Babe Ruth back in 1974). Baseball season has been going on for ten days. On Thursday afternoon, I drove towards Syracuse. I saw the salt truck. The message board told me that there were white-out conditions ahead. “It’s Beginning to Look A Lot Like Christmas,” was the song now playing in my head. “Are you freaking kidding me?” On Friday, it snowed in Syracuse as well. “I’m so tired of all the heavy clothes,” The ironworker foreman said. The sun was shining on Saturday. BUT IT WAS 36 DEGREES! And it’s not looking good for the upcoming week too. They’re talking about maybe fifty degrees by next weekend. “You really gotta’ get the hell out of t...

Do you understand the stock market? I don’t. All I know about it I’ve learned from “Wall Street”, “The Wolf of Wall Street” or “Billions.” I think the whole thing is a scam. That’s my uneducated opinion. It appears that a whole lot of money can be lost, gained or stolen. Traders jump off buildings when things go wrong. Retirements are gambled away. Homes are lost. So, I don’t know what to make of things when I hear: “Stocks have tumbled because of the possibility of a trade war with China.” Sounds bad though. Yet I don’t actually know. What I do know is that for a long while, over the last 6 months or so, the stock market was on the rise. The all-time high was set. Some people were ecstatic! And then the tax plan was passed... ...and everything seemed to tank. I still didn’t know what was going on, but I heard that a lot of the money that the corporations saved ended up back in the market because instead of raising wages, or hiring more people... ...the ...

Had dinner with a great long-time friend. We’ve known each other for about 25 years so we’ve had all sorts of dinners through the years... ...dinners at golf courses, dinner at fancy places, dinner while watching games, or, long ago, having drinks. This time, we spent part of our dinner talking about our dogs. He takes his dog for a run, and then throws the ball for him. I take mine for a ride and then they get a couple of bonies. We were both smiling as we were speaking about our dogs. “They’re always ready with love,” I said. We did discuss business, our families and the Yankees, but I think we both would’ve been fine just talking about Buster, Melky and Paris. Then I read through the local Buffalo news and saw the story. A man with a criminal record was arrested after a grim discovery was made: A dog was found hung in a tree. The people in the neighborhood made the gruesome find and the police quickly solved it. The man who was arrested was unapologetic. He...

Let’s get the Trump recap out of the way. He’s actually been particularly nasty over the last 4 or 5 days. It started on Easter morning as he was heading to church of all places. It was his first trip to church since he became president. He must’ve been peeved that he wasn’t golfing because he was all over immigration again. He’s beat that drum for four straight days. Facts don’t matter either! He is blaming the Democrats over DACA. A little history. DACA was enacted on an executive order by Obama. Everyone spoke about taking it from an executive order to law by negotiating through Congress. Then, out of the blue, Trump used his own executive order to cancel Obama’s, thinking the courts would back him up and force everyone’s hand to make a decision. Wrong. The courts have stuck with Obama’s action, saying that Trump’s order was unlawful. A deal was still needed. Trump said, “Bring me one. I’ll sign it!” Unbelievable, but the GOP and the Dems brought him a deal, that a...

First of all, why the hell do they have to start a Championship Game in the middle of the night? That game didn't start until 9:30! I'm usually getting under the blankets, opening my book and reading until I drop it on the floor. And I was teaching a class last week and there was a young guy in the class - he mentioned that he had three kids - all under the age of five. "How you sleeping?" I asked. "Miserable. It's so miserable," he said. My mind kicked me back in time to the days when sleep was a battle. I go through bouts of insomnia now and again, but most of the time, I sleep pretty consistently. Villanova had the game in hand pretty much by halftime, but I had watched most of the tournament. I wasn't going to go to sleep until I saw them playing in the confetti. All told, I got to sleep at about midnight - a full two hours later than usual. My internal clock had me out of bed at the usual time. "Damn, I'm tired,...

I caught the opening of the 140th Easter Egg hunt on the White House lawn. A few observations: 1). They talked about the hard work that the First Lady performs in the days...and months!...leading up to the event. Evidently, Melania chose th color of the eggs back in December. It was an agonizing decision. 2). I know Trump needs everyone to know he’s doing a tremendous, tremendous job, but in the introduction of the Easter egg hunt he explained that the economy is doing great, best of all times, perhaps, that’s what people are saying. Ya’ think the 5-Year-olds gave a crap? Then reporters started shouting out questions because there hasn’t been a press conference in 16 months. It all ended in a bit of a rant about DACA...something Trump knows little about. Whatever, right? 3). Barron looks uncomfortable. I know it’s weird to even talk about the kids of the first couple, but Barron is always in a suit, and he definitely didn’t look like he was going to find any eggs. I hope he...

Tonight’s game is for all the bragging. I have Villanova, who is favored by 7 points, to beat Michigan in the title game. My bracket will land in the first slot, out of 126 entries. There are some people out there who believe that I may use the winning to agitate. “I get so tired of being right all the time,” I said, to my beautiful wife as we watched ‘Nova hammer Kansas. “You picked the favorite,” she said. “It was the easy choice.” “It was the right choice!” I said. “I took a chance with Xavier,” she said. “That took more guts.” “Makes zero sense,” I mentioned. “I get tired of being right.” “Shut-up.” There was a whole lot more than went into it, though. Sam loves Villanova. He was watching the game in the car on his way to see his cousins. He went from “I’m a little nervous,” to “I’m so happy right now.” I like when my children are happy. Also, one of their friends, Ben, is a big Kansas fan. “I’ll bet you a thousand dollars that Kansas wins,” he said. “...

Hard not to think of Easter without thinking about how Mom hid our Easter baskets until we were adults. Which made for some interesting scenarios. We used to find each other’s baskets and re-hide them. I’ve told the story plenty of times, but Jim and Jeff once hid mine so well that I stopped looking. Found it a few days later... ...the chocolate had melted. One of the most memorable Easter dinners I ever had was down in Maryland. The Switala family had me over and I ate so much food that day... ...and I laughed for hours. This year will be strange. Sam headed off to see his best buddy, Johnny in North Carolina. Jake is heading back to college on Monday. The week ahead is a glimpse into the future. Plenty of episodes of Law & Order, I suppose. Yet, Easter feels refreshing to me. It always has. Spring is probably on the way... ...baseball is underway. Take a deep breath. Enjoy your day. Get energized. Don’t concern yourself with fake news, mean twe...