Posts

Showing posts from January, 2017

We Know Nothing

There's a great debate as to what is real news or fake news. The media is under attack, some say, rightfully slow. Information is everywhere. The conservative writers pen hate stories about Obama and Clinton. Liberal "reporters" find any tidbit of nastiness that is spewing forth from every orifice. And I'm the middle of it all, I watched the movie, Snowden. And there was a moment, in the middle of it all when it occurred to me... ...we know nothing! Everyone is watching. We are tapping other people's phones and computers. Other countries are tapping ours. We're one nasty tweet away from all of this being blown sky high. Even the information we got on Snowden was skewered, depending on who or what we wanted to believe. Yet that hasn't stopped anyone...anywhere in this great land...from coming up with their own narrative  on what should or shouldn't be done. I don't think we should turn away refugees based upon what I was ...

In the Moment

Someone had a photo of the Golden Gate Bridge on their Facebook feed. The mind is a beautiful thing because I instantly thought, and brought up images, of the hundreds of times I saw the view from that bridge. Conversations with Mom and Dad and my brothers and sisters. There was a particular Sunday morning that came to mind. I was with Dad. We were working overtime. We would be paid double time for our trouble. "Uh-oh. You have any money on you?" Dad asked. "Nope. I have my paycheck, but I never cashed it. It's for $1,200 and we've been working so much I never cashed it." Dad showed me his own check. It wasn't cashed either. It was for over three thousand dollars! "Doesn't do us any good if we run out of gas." We drove. Made it over the bridge. (In all the time I lived there I never tired of the view from that bridge). We headed into the heart of the city and that big old Ford Galaxy started to gulp. "Shit!...

We're Living It

Those who don't pay attention to history will be forced to repeat it. I always enjoyed History class. I wanted to know what happened when I wasn't here. I'll never forget the day when my Mom caught me going through the old news clippings of the day JFK was gunned down. Mom saved about 5 different newspapers from that day, and I was about ten years old. I had them all splayed out and she found me sitting on the floor of the storage room in our basement, reading every word. I thought I was in trouble for digging through the boxes! "I saved them for all of you," Mom said. So we'd know what it was to be alive that day. From my youth I remember a lot of the stories of slavery, the great wars, Hitler, the holocaust. All things told to me that I eventually read about. I know exactly where I was when the Berlin Wall came down. I was listening to the Wall, by Pink Floyd, riding in the back of a pick-up truck. (J.C. Was there) I recall Reagan saying ...

The Book Update

My partner in crime, Chris Colantino, who nailed the cover art on "Dogs On Main Street" sent out a photo of me holding copies of two books. "Everything I Know" has been done since about last May. It was an idea that I toyed around with because as a kid the one thing I wanted to do was write a newspaper column. I had a lot of favorite columnists through my early years. One of them was Lewis Grizzard, a comedy writer from Atlanta, Georgia. Grizzard, who died young, put a lot of his columns in book form. His writing made him larger than life to me, and my buddy Al DeCarlo, who read the books with me. When Grizzard died I had an idea that the men who wrote the words I liked to read were living lives that I knew nothing about. As my writing life played out, I started writing this blog every day...and it got a little weird...some of the people featured in the blog...like my beautiful wife and my adoring children started making comments about how I was making thing...

Media Burnout

I'm lost. Every morning I put on the television to watch as I eat a bowl of cereal and drink a cup of coffee. If I put on ESPN I get a full dose of Floppy the Crybaby (LeBron) telling me that he's great. Then the top 10 plays of the night are 7' people dunking a ball. We get it. They're big! So, I flip to the news. Trump has ruined it all. There's not a news story that is safe to watch. Either his spokeswoman is handing out "alternative facts" or the anchor is laying out the lies. Yesterday I flipped on "Married With Children" instead. Al Bundy definitely makes more sense to me. Yet it's just not the television anymore. It's Twitter, Facebook...hell, even this blog. There's orange and gold all over everything these days!! People are fighting like never before. People who are for the governmental change are fighting with those who are vehemently against it. There are side by side photos asking which group ...

Mary Tyler Moore

Who didn't love Laura Petrie? Or Mary Tyler Moore? I grew up in the 1970's. It seemed like Mary Tyler Moore was always on our television. Those were the days, right? When all of America watched all the same shows and talked about them endlessly. TV Land has allowed us to rewatch some of those shows again and about a year or so ago I caught a Dick Van Dyke rerun and I remember thinking: "Man, Mary Tyler Moore was beautiful." She could only wear pants in one scene on that show... ...viewers were outraged to see a woman in pants! And there were never any shots of men and women in bed during those episodes. At best, there were references that seemed a little risky. On the Mary Tyler Moore show there was actually outrage that Mary Richards was on birth control. When you think of it now it all seems odd. My God! She said she was on birth control!! She was a single woman, working alone?? Demanding equal pay? Not depending on a man for her happin...

Leave the Kids Alone

An SNL Writer was suspended for sending a tweet about Barron Trump... ...the 10-year old. Come on, now. That's kinda' like picking on a handicapped person. It should get you punished! Years ago, Rush Limbaugh called Chelsea Clinton the family dog. Normally when you're making fun of someone and putting them down you're doing it to make yourself feel better. I have some good buddies and we make fun of each other all the time. We all know the deal...it's not to cause pain...it's to bring laughs. That's the problem with the tweets that bring children to the nastiness of the adults... ...it's NEVER funny! Barron Trump is 10! What would make you think about bringing him into the conversation and especially saying that he would one day go on a murderous rampage? The kid hasn't done anything wrong. He doesn't know anything about the aggravation that his father has brought to defenseless people. Children don't want to hear na...

The Patriots Are Back in the Big Game!

Damn! I almost had it picked exactly right. Back in September, I said Pats over Packers in the Super Bowl and then the Pats don't show up for the trophy presentation. It may be Pats over Falcons instead . Not guaranteed, mind you as Atlanta is good... ...but man... Think about the NFL Playoffs. They absolutely sucked! There was exactly one good game. One! The Packers-Cowboys game was good. The rest? Sucked! If the Super Bowl somehow turns into a blowout... ( Has that ever happened before? )...and then Roger has to stand up there with Kraft, Belichick and Brady. That would be classic. Following the win on Sunday, Hoodie was presented with the AFC Championship trophy. Did you ever see someone pick up the rest of the garbage bag after the bottom falls out? That's what he looked like he was holding. He actually cringed and held it by the top, and then turned in a half circle and looked for someone to hand it to. Classic! Of course I hate t...

He Walked On the Moon

Eugene Cernan died yesterday morning. He lived a long 82-year life, walking on the moon's surface, at one point, and actually scratching his daughter's initials up there. The stuff of legends. As I watched the Sunday morning news recap of his life I saw all the old photos of Cernon in his gear. The equipment actually looked primitive compared to how we would probably outfit him now for such a trip. I think I saw duct tape holding his hearing protection in place. Yet it was the legacy stuff that I was thinking about. He's in the history books now. Walking on the moon didn't buy him any additional time, but he certainly left his mark, and that's what we all strive for, right? There are moments when the opposite side of it is true. We will see a news report of a man who pisses their life away. We get one shot! Cernan took a chance, worked hard, and left his daughter's initials on the moon! Think of that. And I'm sure that no one has any ...

Women March

I'd really like to be writing about something else. But there is epic unrest this weekend. Can't put my finger on why exactly. On Saturday a couple hundred thousand women descended on Washington to protest. Signs were carried. Voices were raised. In America the right to assemble and protest is a right and a privilege. The violence associated with the protest on the day of the inauguration is not a right. It's really bad form, and shouldn't be a part of any of it. "Violence doesn't solve anything," Mom always said. It most certainly takes away from the message. Yet, women SHOULD be marching against the new administration. The things that were said during the election were more than polarizing... ...they were downright nasty. And yet, there are women in celebration in some areas. I see it on social media. I don't really understand it. There has to be some unease, doesn't there? Planned Parenthood is in real danger. The...

Let's See What Happens

My son sent me a text early this week: "Black people are going to suffer, right?" He asked. I sensed that it was an important conversation and we went back and forth for quite some time, talking about what he'd seen over the last year. Essentially, I mentioned: "I'm hoping that it won't be a time in our history that we regret." Yet, it was a surprising question coming from my son, who has lived his life not afraid of any particular group of people. "A lot of what happened was a product of fear and rage," I told him. "People are often afraid of the unknown, and are enraged by the troubles they've faced along the way. Fear and rage got us here. It won't benefit us to stay stuck there. We have to see what happens now." Not particularly reassuring, but it is difficult to grasp what the next four years will bring. The plan, as presented thus far, is not concise, or even particularly well-presented. Will millions of we...

Daddy's Home!

Thank God! On a clear day in Des Moines I was seated on an airplane in a small seat, but lo and behold, the seat next to me was empty! And would remain empty!! I opened the book I was reading, stretched my legs out into the area below the seat next to me, put on my headphones and was greeted with Sway off Exile on Main Street by the Stones. Six short hours and I would be home. And then...and then...and then... We weren't taking off. The flight attendant grabbed the mic. "Somehow we have a dent on the plane! We don;t know how that happened, but what needs to happen now is that maintenance has to come by and check it out and then we have some paperwork with the FAA to do. We're hoping it only takes 15 minutes or so." Twenty minutes later he grabbed the mic again. He was apologizing over and over. "We need another 15-20 minutes. We're sorry for the inconvenience." Sorry? I checked my paperwork. I was going to miss my connecting...

Travels With Kathy

With apologies to Steinbeck... ...who did "Travels with Charley." Which was about moving around with his dog. We started the trip by my asking her which nickname she'd like for our travels. She went with Kathy Khaos, with a K. So, off we went. We rented a car that had a backup screen. Kathy liked that as I drove. "Slow down!" "That guy is merging!" "Oh-oh-oh!!" I finally let her drive just so the person in the passenger seat would sit quietly. She was backing out of a parking spot. We heard a sound. "What's that?" She asked. I was pointing at the screen. "Oh, I forgot about that! Why is there a pole there?" "It's the pole's fault," I said. The frustration of traveling with someone else is that "he who travels fastest, travels alone", but we were on a semi-vacation. I'd try and relax. "Can we be ready by 1:00?" I'd ask... ...at least 4 hou...

What the Hell Time Is It?

Okay, I've been in Arizona, Nevada, Missouri, Illinois, North Carolina, Kansas, New York and Iowa. In 8 days!! The problem being I was in the Western Time Zone for 2 days, Central for 2, Mountain? for 2.5 and Eastern  for 1.5. I've been eating whenever. Catching naps like a 90-year-old man and trying to figure out what the hell time it is at home. Television shows? Forget it! Part of the problem is that sometimes my phone switches the time to reflect where I am. I sort of expected that... ...but I got burned by ESPN app deciding that I was also in the zone I was in. I turned on the Atlanta-Seattle game two hours before it started. Different beds, different pillows... ...damn I screwed up! I make my own schedule!!! I just never actually considered all the damn time changes! The other night...not sure which state...I went to sleep at my normal time...I thought. I woke at my normal time. Got up and moved around a little and said: "Damn! I'm...

Retirement Home?

We missed the turn to our hotel and did a little spin around the block in Scottsdale. The houses were tiny...and looked worn. "That's all we need," I said pointing to one that is smaller than our garage. Kathy knew exactly what I was talking about. January 14 and we were both in shorts and a tee-shirt. Getting out of Dodge when the snow is flying is a real goal in the coming years. "I don't want to be 70 years old, flopping around in my driveway because I slipped on the ice with my bad hips, legs, back...whatever!" "That one is cute," Kathy pointed to an even smaller place. "We'll be forced to live in close quarters," I warned. "Yeah. Maybe something a little bigger." We were both afraid to look around at any prices for housing in such an area. I'm sure it isn't cheap. We even mentioned our retirement plans to some of the people that we met around here. "Ahh, the old, retired people who...

MLK Day

John Lewis, who marched, and was beaten in a fight for civil rights... ...a lifetime ago... ...was in the news over the weekend because he was in a Twitter fight with the incoming president who stated that Lewis is "all talk, no action." It sounds like a miscalculation to many of us who are not truly emotionally challenged. The fight for rights...basic, human rights...was real. It's still real! Lewis was arrested 45 times and stood shoulder-to-shoulder battling with those who did not want him to eat in white-only restaurants, or drink at a water fountain that might be contaminated if a black man put his lips on it. "Do nothing." Lewis has also served in our government for years...continuing the fight. MLK Day seems even more important this year. The civil unrest is a tangible thing. There are some who believe that "Making America Great Again," is all about stripping people back in their place. Like gays, or blacks, or Mexicans, ...

My Boys

We don't leave home very often. I have to travel a bit for work, but usually it's just a couple of nights and back home. Kathy is never gone for too long. So, on a "vacation" where I mixed in a little work, we are away from the boys for 5 straight days. "I miss them," Kathy said. Of course! We face-timed Sam for a couple of minutes, but he wasn't much interested. Yet, there are texts going around. Jake texted me about a couple of NBA guys. We went back and forth about life. Sam is the guy who is keeping the house under control...and taking care of the dogs. Then this: "We had pizza and the box isn't in the fridge." A pizza box in the refrigerator is a big no-no when I'm home. "It is in the fridge," Kathy said. "They confessed." So far we know that their big rebellion is keeping the box in the refrigerator where energy is wasted to get the box cold is happening!! If that's all that happens....

The B Street Band

So, Trumplethinskin is actually going to have music at his little hate bash next week. Except it's a tribute band. New Jersey's own B-Street Band. They play Springsteen music as a tribute to the Boss. The fact that they are playing for The Inaguration is pretty galling to Springsteen fans and most certainly makes Bruce's blood boil. After all, the music has been about everything but the isolation and bitterness that may just be around the corner. I've followed Springsteen since I was 11 years old. I have always understood the message. It's exactly 180 degrees different than the message that President Golden Shower is suggesting. So the lead singer of the tribute band has been getting his ass handed to him. But here's the rub. The B-Street Band also played for Obama twice. They aren't rich people. They had signed a contract back in 2013. Long before the Russian spy ran for the highest office. They understand that Bruce is most likely...

Out In the Desert

Just doing my time. Relaxing, a little, looking around with my beautiful wife, of course. I've nicknamed her Kathy Khaos (with a K) for the trip. We actually went backwards to get here...stopping at JFK... I sat with out bags at the food court as she popped outside for some nicotine, and a older man plopped down next to me with a slice of pizza on a platter. "Can't find my freaking wife," he said. "She got Chinese, I wanted pizza. Supposed to meet here. I ain't looking." I laughed. "How long you been in for?" "46 years." He pointed to the raised platform. "She's up there." He didn't get up to leave. He opened his pizza and we chatted about our lives. Ira has a couple of daughters, a son and a bunch of grandkids. "Try not to waste days," he said. "It goes fast. There aren't any guarantees." His wife stopped by as he shared his life with me. "I'll meet you at...

Meryl Streep

It was an amazing speech. She earned the right to give it after a lifetime of being in the national spotlight. Yet some are saying that she should simply keep her mouth shut as she is only an entertainer. Kind of like a dancing monkey, I suppose. Yet, how can Twitler be upset that an entertainer was spouting off about politics? Isn't that how this entire political shitstorm started? Trumplethinskin believed that Obama wasn't born in this country. He started his political career by demanding that the president release his birth certificate. He was a reality show star then. Certainly nowhere near as accomplished as Streep. Perhaps she is gearing up to run against him in 2020. Why not? Qualifications are not required. Hell, she can demand that secret service protect her in the Hollywood Hills. But it's not really about that... ...it's about what she said. Streep never once mentioned P-groper by name. Instead she spoke of bad behavior, hurtfu...

Faline

"Faline entered the McGaughey residence on the morning of December 19, ate three cookies and then left to wander outside." That quote is from a Washington Post article from January 7. The article infuriated me. You see, Faline is a mule deer who was befriended by the family on 6-acres of land in Kansas. The deer was a unique animal who would knock on the door when it wanted human contact. Taryn McGaughey would feed the animal, hang scarves around the neck so hunters wouldn't shoot her, and even allowed the deer to lie on the living room floor with her as she watched television. The deer also left the residence for days on end...disappearing into the woods...to live the life of a deer. Faline wasn't confined. The neighbors knew all about the unique relationship. One of them called the wildlife commission and reported it. What happened next makes me ill. The wild life enforcement agents converged on the residence, and found Faline on the property. ...

Sully

It's been snowing a lot. It's ungodly cold. We have food, enough bones for the dogs, and whatever else we need. So, I grabbed two movies: "Bad Moms" and "Sully." We laughed a lot at "Bad Moms"...a little silly, but Mila Kunis (other than thinking of Meg from Family Guy every time she spoke) was good and stunningly beautiful.  (She's no Kathy Fazzolari). Funny. "We watching "Sully"?," my beautiful wife asked.  She had worked the 5 a.m. shift, so I had my doubts about her participation. "Put it on." I had remembered the story, of course, but it had happened early in '09... ...a year I can't even think about without extreme sadness... So I forgot a lot of it. First off, Tom Hanks is as great as everyone says he is. When they showed the real guy at the end, I dismissed him as not being the true Sully. And I loved it because of how great it was presented... ...and because it was a...

It's Evil

The video of the group of evil kids torturing the special needs kid... ...is just evil. Nothing more and nothing less. It is not a condemnation of all black men and women just as Dylan Roof is not reflective of how white folks live their lives. But that concept simply can't be grasped, I guess. "This is on Obummer! He doesn't say anything if it's a white person being beat!" Well, actually, he did. He said the same thing as he did when asked about violence, no matter who was involved: "We're better than this." "This has to stop." "Let's work together to stop the shootings." Play the tape... ...he's anti-violence. Anti-evil. As we all are... ...right? Right??? "Those kids need to be raped and beaten to death!!!" One man said on Facebook. I actually know the guy who made that comment. Violence is here to stay! If we wanted to stop it...we'd stop reveling in it. A day lat...

Upside Down

So, the cars are home. One is smashed up pretty good, but my beautiful wife wasn't hurt. She was shaken by the "one split-second" aspect of it all being so fragile. There's no more lonely feeling than having someone smash into you in a vehicle. I was supposed to be on a plane for Boston on Friday morning. We didn't have a working car and the airline was willing  to refund the cost of the ticket to my client. Given what happened on Thursday...I didn't roll the dice. Live to fight another day. So, I walked back to the car. There was a calm after the storm. Less than 15 degrees. It was almost beautiful. A light wind. Roads still packed with snow. The church lot was still half-filled with abandoned vehicles. Buried underneath mounds of snow. I hadn't slept well. I felt a little sick. Three hours of snow coming down...however many inches an hour. Lives turned upside down. We came out all right. I almost hugged my car when I saw...

Sham

Maybe it is all about being a trusting, naive kid. We all start there. We believe what they tell us in the history books. "This is how the government works." And we eat it up, believing that it's all on the straight and narrow. As we get a little older, we start hearing grumbling about how everyone in the governing body is out for themselves. We are skeptical because of what we heard about as kids. "Surely there are people who have integrity and care about us, right?" Then a little more time passes and the skepticism grows. We see it creep into our daily lives. The rich get richer. The deck seems stacked. But there are still honest people left, right? This past election was all about exposing some of the corruption. We heard about the draining of the swamp. Could our government work for the people again? I saw something on the newsfeed today... ...two items actually: George W. and his wife, Laura, agreed to attend the inauguration...

Unbelievable

I heard the reports... ...I knew that I had to make my way home yesterday afternoon. So I saw it coming, but I had a 3:00 appointment so I was going to be cutting it close. I didn't make it! Not by a long shot. Here's what is aggravating... ...I made it to within a mile of my house. What is worse... ...I was stopped dead in my tracks just 50 yards from the church parking lot . If I can just get into the lot...I can walk home. God help me. Nope. Not listening. I sat in the car for three and a half hours. An EMT finally made his way to each car window. "It's going to be about six hours before we clear this. We're trying to make arrangements to get you to the church parking lot." Yes!  The Church Parking Lot!! But that didn't happen for another 45 minutes or so. When it finally did, I jumped from the car, grabbed my gloves and hat and started off down the road. So happy. And I fell. Just in the snow though. Small...

Liar Liar

There's a great temptation to make this space a politics free zone in 2017. But how can that be possible? There may be political stories to cover... ...but as luck might have it, most of them will have life's lessons attached. Like the Wall Street Journal story about how they are going to handle Trumplethinskin's words. When he lies they are going to classify it as something other than a lie. Sounded to me like the "That depends on what the definition of 'is' is"  defense." The editor at WSJ said that what sounds like a lie might not actually be a lie and it all depended upon the interpretation of the person hearing the lie. WTF? Can you imagine? Wife: Where were you? At the bar? Man: I was at the office. Wife: I drove by the bar. I saw you get out of the car and walk into the bar. I sat in the parking lot until you stumbled back out of the bar and got in your car, and you're telling me you were at the office? Man: The...

Faker

So, everyone in America has seen the clip of Mariah Carey by now, right? She was most likely paid a ton of cash to sing a few songs on New Year's Eve. Evidently there were technical problems and her ear piece fell out. So she did the only thing she could possibly do... ...refused to try and sing. Just wasn't possible! How the hell was a singer supposed to sing? Mariah is a bit of a diva, right? She has handlers who carry her up steps, or put her shoes on for her. What's really weird is that she can really sing, or she used to be able to. She would hit notes that would hurt your ears. She's sold over 220 million albums... ...and she can't sing a song live? The lip-syncing garbage does go on. Some of the singers are dancing and jumping and live singing doesn't play very well, but she was absolutely lost! Was weird to see. After the show she wrote an apology and posted it on twitter. "Shit happens." Of course, what does s...

Don't Hit Send

There's a story going around Buffalo involving a member of the Buffalo School Board, Carl Paladino.  Nationally some out there may have even heard the story. Paladino ran for governor a few years back and his campaign imploded... ...because of the wild things he did and said. The latest problem came from an interview with the Buffalo paper Artvoice. Carl was asked what he would like to see happen in 2017. His answer involved the death of Obama and a truly nonsensical statement about Michelle Obama running off with a gorilla and living happily ever after. The comments look worse in print. The fact that the Obama's are African-American... ...well... ...not good! Paladino explained (after saying a couple of times that he meant every word) that he sent the "jokes" which he only meant to share with friends, to the paper by "mistake." He hasn't meant to hit forward. He's a 'tell it like it is' guy... ...un...

# Organized!!!

My beautiful wife is resolving to be more organized in 2017. After 20-some years of pure chaos in some aspects... ...we're going to have more focus, as a family! I'm not exactly sure what led to this resolution, but I have a few doubts that it'll work to my satisfaction. You see, I'm actually the one who is too far the other way. I  write everything down. I plan things to the minute, so much so that the dogs start moving around a few minutes before they're supposed to eat, or go out, or go to bed. Everything at the same time. Every day. Melky and Paris are used to the routine. Kathy and the boys... ...aren't. Not even close! We discussed clutter in our common space. "I feel less anxious when things are orderly," I explained. "Really? I didn't notice," Kathy said. "But I'm going to try. I need a notebook to write things down." I bought her a black notebook, found a photo of myself and taped it to t...