Pat Conroy is one of my favorite authors.
Beach Music is in the top ten of my favorite books.
There were a few others that were nearly as good.
Conroy always made me think a lot and he wrote classic characters who were deep thinkers themselves.
All the while the plot move forward.
We actually both received awards from the New England Book Festival -
- one year apart.
I missed his speech for having the best overall book of that year.
I showed up the next year.
Still pissed I missed it.
But I read the sad news a few days ago.
Conroy has pancreatic cancer.
There wasn't any discussion on his diagnosis or prognosis or any other kind of -osis.
He simply said that he owed his fans a novel and that he would finish it.
Then there was another quote.
He said that he spent a whole lot of time considering his life in an attempt to figure out what it meant...and that he was no closer to a solution than when he first started thinking about it.
And now he's supposedly walking up the 18th fairway.
And it hit me.
I've done a lot of what he has also done.
Think, wonder, think some more, read, measure, wonder, gaze in wild wonder, figure, compute and think a little more.
What does it mean?
And maybe some of it is a prerequisite for wanting to write.
Read another quote yesterday as well.
It said that you don't choose to write...
But I sensed a little regret in the Conroy quote.
I feel regret from time to time in my own mind.
Why so uptight?
And I thought about whether or not I could change a little...
...just a little.
Why don't you enjoy your life instead of trying to understand it?
The day when I read the quote I was in a hotel room.
I had the new book on the flash drive...
...I could and should work on the edit.
I was a little tired from a long day out on the sites.
I was also watching Billions and then Better Call Saul.
I was feeling guilty that I was just watching and not editing.
And I lectured myself for a moment.
It'll figure itself out without me.
That's the sad part.
I hope Conroy has another 8 books in him.
And that by the time he goes he's figured all of it out.
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