Jacks or Better to Open

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Far be it of me to defend A-Rod. Despite the fact that he is on the 27-time World Champion Yankees, I feel he is a bit of a Lance Douche Armstrong, or Tiger Cheetah Woods.

When confronted with a moral dilemna...like the other two mentioned above, he takes the low road.

But baseball is now investigating him for playing poker, and they are talking about a suspension.

I hope they suspend him for the next 19 games because he won't be back for 20. He's out with a knee injury.

I've played poker. Have you played poker?

Maybe not $500 bucks a hand, but it's the same game, right?

I was once playing poker with a group of my very closest friends. One of my buddies, who shall remain nameless (John Cataldo) decided to play a game that was jacks or better to open. I kept getting a pair of tens.

In my under the weather state, I grew annoyed with the game. John grew annoyed with me.

Soon enough about five of us were rolling around the floor in an epic match that we still talk about to this day.

Poker is stupid.

A-Rod is stupid.

Baseball is stupid for trying to suspend him.

Come on, what was A-Rod to do? He has all that money. Once in awhile he isn't 'doing' a movie star. The Yanks don't play every day and since he stopped taking 'roids he's hurt now and again.

The poor guy gets bored.

It's lonely in that mansion.

I say: 'Leave him alone'.

He isn't going to the Hall of Fame anyway. He's going down in the records with Sammy Sosa, Ortiz, Manny, McGwire, Bonds, Douche Armstrong, and Cheetah.

A dopey bastard who couldn't get enough.

But he does have a World Series ring and he hit a couple of bombs when the Yanks whipped the hapless Phillies in '09.

So, he gets a bit of a pass.

I'm out.

Comments

John said…
"nameless" huh? You're an idiot!
06 August, 2011
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