Dark Clouds

-

I’m not a fan of the big, dark clouds that seem to press down on you from above.

Unfortunately I had to drive 5 hours over the course of a couple of days and soon enough, we had a theme.

I heard a song, ‘Shining Eyes’ by James McMurtrey that made me think of 1989, and a girl I was dating back then. 

I saw her clearly in my mind’s eye, and those dark clouds pressed down as I mourned her passing about a year ago.

I thought of her life for about twenty or thirty miles and it hurt my heart.

Mick & Keith came on a little while later doing ‘Memory Motel’ with the chorus, “You’re just a memory of a love that used to mean so much to me.”

So, we definitely had a theme for the lonely dark ride!

Then I heard about an illness, thought about the latest mass shooting, and the kid who was shot dead in Chicago.

Man, life can beat you down!

Then I thought back to some of the summer days in the past.

A softball game, or a night out with a group of friends, throwing darts or playing video hockey.

I’ve often heard it said that you can control your mood by thinking positive thoughts.

I’ve often thought, “What the hell good would that do?”

But I tried it.

Garbage in, garbage out is a lonely place to be, but every time I tried to change the mood, those dark clouds pressed down on the damn hood of the car.

I picked up the golf ball I carry around with me, thought about our Sunday morning tee time.

“It’s gonna’ be cold.”

Just kept moving forward.

On a job I spoke to a guy about being vaccinated. He told me that I was dumb because I didn’t know what was in the shot.

I wasn’t going to get into that argument.

Bruce brought me out of it, as he usually does, with ‘Reason to Believe’ off the Nebraska record.

“Struck me kind of funny. Seems kind of funny, sir to me, how at the end of every hard earned day, people find some reason to believe.”

I shut the car door.

Heavy, dark clouds and a light rain.

I thought about my old friend who’d passed away way too young.

Reason to believe.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Suits

-
Like a lot of other people we got pulled into the series, ‘Suits’ on Netflix. I’ve never had much fun hanging around lawyers who have questioned me as a construction safety officer. I once testified in a case where the opposing lawyer started questioning me by going through my educational background. “So,” he said, racing to a crescendo, “You graduated from college with a degree in Communications-Journalism and suddenly, 30 years later, you’re a ‘safety expert.’” He actually made the quotation marks with his fingers. I just looked at him. “How does that happen?” He bellowed, sure that he was going to discredit me. “Well,” I said. “I knew I was overqualified to become a lawyer.” The courtroom erupted in laughter. Even the judge chuckled. The rest of his questions landed flat. So, I wasn’t all that keen on a show about lawyers, but ‘Suits’ is great. Meghan Markle became a princess because of the show, and she is very good in it (and a beautiful woman). Yet, there is so much more. The wri
Read more

My Buddy, Dave

-
Way back in 1997, I started working with a steel erection company out of Syracuse. I was coming straight from a long stint with a steel erector here in Buffalo so I knew my stuff when it came to steel erection safety rules. On day one, I met with the safety director and he was just getting started as a safety guy, but man, he certainly cared about the guys he worked with. Dave was a good man from the start. He’d say things like: “You’re so full of beans.” Just a down to earth, hardworking guy who became a fast friend. We drove all around New York State setting up jobs. I always let Dave drive so that I could rest. One fine day, way up North of Syracuse, we passed a state trooper.  I glanced at the speedometer. “You’re screwed,” I said, and seconds later, the lights came on. Dave was beside himself.  The cop stopped by the window, grabbed the license and registration and headed back to his vehicle. “Here’s the thing,” I said. “You’re pissed, but you’re such a good guy that I bet you tha
Read more

Mom & Ollie

-
Image
 Ollie Stadium is a mess. The heavy rains rendered the backyard a mud pit and even though we threw in the side yard, the Big O was looking for more, and we were both covered in mud. I had to take some steam out of him somehow so I suggested we go visit Grandma. Ollie hates the car, but he laid quietly as we made the trip. We even brought the football because there is plenty of room to play at Grandma’s. Mom opened the door and started laughing. I thought about the love she had for every single dog we ever had. Oliver was quick to give my Mom a kiss, and then he stood beside her. The love between Mom and Dogs is a mutual bond. Through the years, Mom would make breakfast for the dogs.  Fried eggs, toast, bacon… She would wrap Christmas gifts for them. “To Jeter, Love Santa,” she would write on the cards. They played with the big chicken that made a lot of noise. Mom tossed the football and Ollie brought it back to her. As the visit drew to a close I headed for the door.  “C’mon, Oliver,”
Read more