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Showing posts from April, 2020

Losing It

Feeling a tad agitated. Probably not alone, but some of the news is aggravating me more than it probably should like Pence not wearing a mask. I mean, that just doesn’t make sense. He’s the leader of the Coronavirus task force. He doesn’t protect himself when he’s visiting people who are actually sick. There are ACTUALLY people downing disinfectant and making trips to emergency rooms. I finally lost in on social media when a fan of the GOP wanted to hold Biden to task for the accusation made by Tara Reade. Now? Now they’re demanding transparency??? Put it all on the table... ...do it. All the accusations about the character of Trump over the last three years and now what women have to say is important to you?? So, I’m fatigued, I guess. I’m tired of the new normal, I miss baseball, I don’t ever want to hear someone explain to me that “people die from the flu and car accidents too. I’m aggravated by the lack of testing, the people being forced back into meat proc...

Disposable People

An executive order was signed on Tuesday to reopen the meat processing plants that have been ravaged by Coronavirus. The plants haven’t been ravaged though... ...the people who work there have. And yes, America needs to be fed, and the economy must open up, but if they’re reopening the plants, surely those who fear the virus or are vulnerable will be protected, right? Safeguards will most certainly be put into play to ensure worker safety, right? Right? Wrong! Two other items made the news to piggy back on that executive order that forces the plants open. First, liability. The company wanted assurances that when the worker gets sick and maybe dies that the company won’t be liable. Secondly, unemployment. That’s off the table. The plant is open, and if you don’t show up because maybe you have someone at home that is vulnerable, or maybe because you don’t want to freaking die... ...tough shit. Unemployment benefits are not an option. So, add up those three t...

Re-Opening

Monday was a total surprise... ...way more cars on the road... ...people everywhere. “Did I miss a memo?” I wondered. I didn’t think that the New York Pause was supposed to end until May 15th... ...but here we are. Jobs have plenty of guys on them. Some wearing coverings, others faking it. “Why didn’t you make it mandatory to wear respirators?” One guy asked me. “I can’t. Per OSHA rules if it’s mandatory then the company has to pay for medical and fit tests.” “Hasn’t New York made it mandatory?” “Not a respirator, but a covering.” I started to walk away. “What happens if someone is sick here because an employer is forcing him to come back early. Who’s liable?” “I don’t know.” And the pressure is coming from the other side... ...employers trying to get their employees back. “The lazy bastards are making more on unemployment than they would be working.” “They aren’t supposed to be working yet,” I said. One owner called it this way: “These bunch of pu...

What Are We Doing?

I don’t understand it anymore. People are dying. A lot of people. And Sunday might have been a quiet day politically but Trump spent the day sending hate tweets. Just absolute mind-boggling garbage. First, attacking those who laughed at him for his disinfectant, light rant from last week. Then complaining about the “noble” prizes that reporters received for the Russia story. Couple of things. Reporters are awarded Pulitzer Prizes, not the Nobel Prize. Secondly, he spelled Nobel wrong at least 3 times. Lastly, the senate committee actually validated the Russia story this week. A few hours later... ...he tweeted that he spelled Nobel wrong because he was being sarcastic again. My God! What are we doing??? He’s mentally incapable of even making it through a Sunday afternoon. Over 55,000 Americans have died in about six weeks. A lot of people don’t know where their next meal is coming from. States are on the verge of bankruptcy. And he’s absolutely off the rai...

Seasons Change

We made the leap by setting a tee time for 9:42 on Saturday morning. Yet, as I drove to the golf course where I learned how to play back about 40 years ago, I was feeling a little nostalgic. Maybe having The Rolling Stones record, ‘Emotional Rescue’ on had something to do with it. That record came out 40 years ago. (It’s still really great). I passed a spot on 75 where I thought about an old friend who lost her battle with cancer this week. Janine and I dated for awhile back about 30 years ago, and we had fun going to hockey games and drinking margaritas. We were part of a large group of friends. I thought of her because her tragic death has been on my mind all week (she was a great person and a very skilled nurse) but I also thought of her because we were driving on 75 in a snow and ice storm and I hit black ice... ...on a hill and a narrow stretch of road. I was going 50 mph at the time and black ice is a hopeless situation. It was all I could do to keep the car on the ...

Dumbest Comment Ever?

By now you know exactly what I’m referencing by the title of this post. Let me set the scene: We were watching a Netflix show called ‘Money Heist’ - it was described to me as ‘it’s all right’ and that would be my review as well. Not bad, not great. It will pass the time and keep us from watching the daily briefings. But I was on Twitter. “Trump just wondered if injecting bleach would work to kill the virus,” I said. “No he didn’t,” Kathy said. “Someone is messing with you.” The clip was already up. I played it. For the next half an hour or so we were in disbelief. “That’s the dumbest damn thing I’ve ever heard someone say,” Kathy said. “He’s supposed to be a leader. I can’t believe it.” And all through the evening I watched social media blow up. The jokes, the fights, the pro-Trump people fighting with the anti-Trump people... ...and I couldn’t get over one single thing: That it was a colossally dumb think to muse about. Yet, when I opened my eyes on Friday mo...

In These Trying Times

Every single commercial is now starting the same way. Some of the introductory words change but they are basically all the same: “In these trying times we know that you’re just looking for some certainty and you’re thinking about how to best survive.” Then they try and sell their product. I hate fake sympathy. I also can’t stand when I walk into a huge business - think Walmart and they ask me to round up my change or give $1 or $2 or $5 to help whatever cause they choose. You’re basically printing money... ...you donate it! And back in early 2017... ...about 2 weeks into the presidency I asked a buddy of mine... ...how we could possibly maintain this pace. “People aren’t going to want to spend every day thinking about the presidency.” “It’ll lighten up,” that buddy said. It hasn’t in more than 3.5 years. I’ve been asking the same sort of question lately... ...how long can we live a life of despair here. People are dying. I know a man who lost his life ...

Open All Night

Camp Clifford is highly functional right now... ...and although we have less campers... ...everyone here appears to be having a grand time. Let’s start with the dogs. Melky and the Pair are spoiled beyond belief. They are starting to mess with me now. Because time doesn’t matter to anyone now except the camp counselor! Melky makes me beg her to go outside. At better than 14 years old her legs don’t work all that well, so I have to help her up and down the stairs. Once I get her out I have to beg her to come in. Paris always wants to go out. She will stay outside for hours if we let her. They are both eating double their amount of bones. As for the two prominent campers... ...time doesn’t matter to them either. The other night I heard a long conversation taking place. At 2:40 in the morning. “What happened?” I asked Kathy the next day. “Sam having a problem?” “No, why?” “Cause you were talking about something last night.” “Yeah, we were talking about what...

Half-Throttle

It appears as if we are forever stuck in the week between Christmas and New Year’s. I’ve been back out there for awhile now and it’s all so weird. Everyone has an opinion. “This mask isn’t protecting me anyway,” a guy told me yesterday. “The virus can penetrate the surgical masks that we are given so what difference does it make if I wear it over my face and nose or just wear it on my chin.” He thought he had a point. “The rules of the site are to wear it over your mouth and nose. I don’t care if you think it doesn’t protect you. That has zero impact on whether or not I throw you off the site. So, either follow the site rules or you can sit on your couch with it on your chin where you can spew your intellect to your dog or cat. It’s up to you.” Then there are the guys who don’t believe any of it. “The people out there demonstrating are heroes,” another guy said. “They’re calling attention to the charade. When this is all over you’ll see that there weren’t 40,000 deaths. T...

Mowed the Lawn

Every year we kick around the idea of getting the lawn cut before it gets too high and then takes four times longer than it should. We failed again this year. As per usual, I got the party started by handling the back yard where the dogs hang out. It took a long while. The mower kept jamming up and stalling out. I only got through it because I knew that Sam had the other two areas. And normally, I enjoy cutting the grass. I like the freshly cut grass smell. I passed Sam after I finished my part. “We blew it again,” I said. “We waited too long.” “It snowed 4 days ago,” Sam said. “Not much we could do.” And there’s sort of a rebirth when the grass is freshly cut... ...I can’t exactly put my finger on it, but I feel it. Looking out the window is better. Everything seems cleaner. Of course, it’s been a weird spring, hasn’t it? I spent the hour after cutting the grass gazing at photos of people gathering in protest to try and make sure their rights aren’t violate...

Full Of Life

We are watching stories of men and women dying alone. Many of these people have lived life to the fullest and their days of dancing, sharing dinners, going to work, hugging their grandchildren and just loving... ...are now they are alone. In quarantine, taking their last breath as they are surrounded by masked healthcare workers who are trying, in vain, to save them. That’s what we need to think about and feel right now. “We’re doing a great, perfect, incredible, tremendous job” rings a little hollow to those who are left behind to mourn. We are all watching the number go up. 40,000 lives lost. Each and every single one of those lives is a story of someone who wanted to continue to love. If you’re of a mind to minimize the number: “More people die in car accidents.” Or if you are of the mindset to say: “It could’ve been a bigger number.” Just think of one thing. For every one of those lives lost there are hundreds of people who are affected. Wives, husbands, M...

I Just Don’t Get It

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There are protests taking place. Gun-toting, no-mask-wearing, angry Americans gathering to take their liberties back... ...in the middle of a freaking pandemic! Where the number of cases continues to grow and the death tally hits an all-time high each day. We want the country up and running. All of us do. We understand that the economy needs to grow and that we all have to get back to our lives. I want baseball back. I want to play golf and go to restaurants and visit my Mom and siblings and friends. But at what cost? Haven’t we seen enough to understand that this is a fatal virus for a great number of people who get it. So, I just don’t get it! Where is the rage coming from? What is a gun going to do? Why aren’t these people protecting themselves? When I looked at the photos, I was at an absolute loss. Trump, of course, has an absolute hand in inciting the violence. His “liberate” tweets on Friday morning were targeted to states with Democratic leaders. ...

The Doctor

Just because you have doctor in front of your name it doesn’t make you smart. Especially when you might be a fake doctor. In recent days, three “doctors” made the news. Dr. Drew who swore to God that this would be no worse than the flu was spewing even more garbage. He has been forever under fire for his suspect policies on working with celebrities who’ve struggled with addiction. Usually because after he “cares” for them they die. Then we have Dr. Phil who is operating as a doctor with the same doctor’s license as me. He’s a hillbilly. He made a false equivalence telling all that we don’t shut down the world because people die in car accidents or drown in pools. He also made it even worse because he claimed that there are 360,500 drowning deaths when it’s actually around 3,600. Besides drowning and car crashes aren’t contagious. In any regard it was a callous, irresponsible statement. Yet, the Doctor who takes the cake for flat-out dumbassery, was Dr. Oz who is also tied...

A Drink On Me

Niagara Falls is a truly depressing place. Sure there is one of the 7 natural wonders of the world there, but the downtown area and the residential areas not far from there... ...well, it’s depressing. Yesterday I had to visit a job in a pretty rough looking neighborhood. I parked my car, and made sure that I locked the doors. As I put on my mask, I noticed a very skinny, extremely dirty, black man eyeing me up. He was sitting on a broken down porch, in a busted chair in front of a deteriorating home. I walked by even though I heard him say: “Hey!” I went into the job which was just a couple of doors down and spent a good half hour walking around. As I was leaving, I thought about the black guy. I made a decision before he even asked the question. He saw me coming, and he stood up slowly. I put two one-dollar bills down on the floor of the porch as I walked by. “I wanted to ask you if you had a dollar,” he said. “God Bless you.” I had set the two singles dow...

And Now It’s Snowing

I need to go on the record here... ...the reopening of the country is going to be a disaster. I’ve always considered it like Nielsen Ratings. The little portion I see of the world on a daily basis gives me a glimpse into the rest. People are going to step out of their homes and go right back at it. Maybe they’ll be cautious for a day or two, but soon enough... ...social distancing will go by the way side... ...the hand-washing will lessen. We will hear that we beat the big, bad virus and our head cheerleader will start talking about the roaring economy... ...and people will continue to get sick. And die. The talk of curves and flattening and second waves will bury us and we will be quarantined again. Those of us who survive. I know that sounds awfully cynical but I’ve spent every waking day trying to tell men and women that they shouldn’t do something that might injure or kill them. Human nature tells them that “it won’t happen to me”. Therefore, the collectiv...

I’m Trying

I’m trying to NOT hear Trump’s voice. Really blew it on Monday during a switch over from HULU or Netflix or some damn thing to regular television... ...I saw 10 minutes of an epic meltdown that may have inflicted more damage on what this country stands for than 9/11. Three people were seething in that ten minutes: Me, Kathy and the Big Orange Menace. It was brutal. On Tuesday, I tried to avoid his voice. Worked. Better day! I’m trying to go half-throttle at work... ...because there are precious few jobs going. I’ve always thrived on the hustle of it all. I’m trying to not miss baseball so much, but a buddy of mine keeps posting: “Remember when” photos and man, I miss the every day of that routine! I’m trying to keep Melky’s streak going! Poor girl had a bit of a time there about a month ago when she couldn’t quite make it down the 30 steps and get outside before some pee would escape. I mentioned to my beautiful wife and the king of quarantine (Sam) that...

Back In the Saddle (Sort Of)

I was grounded for two full weeks. Wasn’t a hell of a lot of fun. Didn’t have to set the alarm to get up on Monday morning... ...I was ready to roll. At the first job I saw a bunch of guys hanging around together. I yelled at them. “At least 6’ apart,” I said. “Dude, you got a better chance at catching the lottery than you do the virus,” one guy said. “That’s not true,” I said. “And if you want to stay here, you’ll follow the rules.” So, right back at it. Telling dopes what they need to do to stay healthy. Hoping they listen. I went to a few different sites... ...didn’t have any conversations that didn’t have something to do with the virus. What I missed about being out there was what I love about my job. Walking around a construction site is very comfortable to me. Has been for a lot of years. Here in Buffalo, I know virtually everyone so it’s always good to see their faces. I’m just not going to do very well in talking to the people who think it’s a “hoax”...

That Was Different

Saw my siblings and niece and nephews for Easter. On zoom. There wasn’t a lot on the meeting agenda... ...just a few insults and smiles hurled from a bunch of different residences. We shared our menus - everyone was eating pretty well. I made a huge meal. Ham, turkey, potatoes, stuffing, asparagus and corn with buttered rolls. There was cake and ice cream. A big meal, prayers on television and news about the pandemic. I spoke to a few people on the phone and wrote and answered about 100 texts... ...by 8 p.m., I was pretty worn out. And it was a strange weekend because on Saturday night I went to bed by 11:00 and after reading for a little while, I fell asleep. Then I woke up... ...and I felt a wave of sadness. For those who had died. For my boys who are looking to me for answers. I don’t have any. I felt sad for the people who didn’t know how they were going to eat, or pay the rent. There was a sadness for those feeling sad. And I thought about what ...

Happy Easter!🐣 Stay 🏠 Home!!

I considered a lot of Easter’s gone past. Mom hiding baskets for us as we were grown men and women. My siblings finding her hiding spots and re-hiding the baskets in much tougher spots. Found melted chocolates in the attic a few days after Easter one year (thanks, Jeff). And it was always about family, the big dinners and church services. This will be the first Easter where I don’t attend a church service. But I wouldn’t even consider it right now... ...I wouldn’t think that anyone would... ...but there are pastors all over screaming about the closing down of the services. A number of these clowns are trying to argue that the entire shut down is all about stopping people from celebrating their religion. “The whole thing is a joke!” One Christian commenter posted. “Only old people are dying! They’re just trying to take away our rights!! We all need to go back to our lives and our faith!!!” How very Christian of that dude to dismiss “only old people.” Secondly, cons...

All Fired Up

Nowhere to go. Pure craziness. The mind plays tricks on you, right? A lot of people reading this have been conditioned to work and live a certain way. I also fall into that category. So, frustration settles in. This week has been a lot of talking on the phone with owners and supervisors who are concerned about getting back out there. Some have tried to talk me into telling them that it’s okay. Others have been pissed because I can’t explain the rules away. “It’s hard to do construction when men have to be 6’ apart,” one owner said. “So, should I not do it?” “If you can’t keep guys separated, yeah. Shut it down.” “How long are these rules going to be in effect?” He asked. I didn’t answer right away... ...he filled in the blanks... “How would you know, right?” “Right.” “This sucks,” he said. “So does going on a ventilator.” Yet, there are certainly moments when I struggle with it. Like when I first wake up. All my life I’ve jumped up out of bed as if t...

One Long Day

Millions more filed for unemployment. The briefings have devolved into mud-slinging and finger-pointing and arguments about a timeline that can’t be explained. I read a long article about vivid dreams and how they’re being reported all across the land. I read it because I’ve been having them too. It’s not because I’ve been sleeping any longer... ...I’ve stuck to my routine, but the dreams I recalled on Thursday all had Coronavirus details mixed in. And I’m concerned because I think people are getting antsy. I see more conspiracy theories in the twitter timeline... ...the elite are trying to shut down society or the election or Trump... ...it all depends on which angle you’re seeing it from. But has there ever been a more, ‘it is what it is’ situation? And today is Good Friday. I have so many fond memories of Holy Week and the altar boy tasks from my past. We did the stations of the cross for hours back then. A lot of praying. I’ve seen some dumb things that ...

John Prine - American Legend

American songwriter John Prine died yesterday. Was just 73 years old. He got sick a couple of weeks ago and the complications of COVID-19 claimed him. It’s always weird to lose a recording artist because thankfully their work will be accessible forever. That’s good news, but the bad news is that every time I hear a song from one of those artists - think Tom Petty, Eddie Money, Ric Ocasek... ...hell, even Dino or Elvis or Sinatra... ...there’s a twinge of sadness. And now John Prine’s songs like Angel of Montgomery or Paradise or Sam Stone or In Spite of Ourselves... ...all fall into the same category. Now Prine wasn’t the world’s biggest star. He finally received some critical acclaim but he was more a working man star. A guitar and excellent lyrics. He spent some time as a mailman. Patterned his writing after Steinbeck and I love that. When an artist dies I also think of the music that is now lost to us. Prine finally put out a record a couple of years ago ...

Hitting Home

Tom Dempsey kicked field goals for the Bills. Coronavirus killed him. Boris Johnson. Marianne Faithful. The news is tragic. Men, women and even children. But it didn’t actually hit home until... ...a man I know from work passed. He’s younger than me. Had a large family, grandkids. Good, solid man. Then the father of one of my sons friends. “That’s so awful!” Kathy said when she heard. Younger than me. A man who worked out, ran marathons. Rumors of people sick... ...on ventilators... ...”not going to make it.” Just a few weeks ago, we were all simply living our lives, oblivious to the fact that our government had been warned about a public safety health hazard that would ravage our lives and kill our co-workers, friends, family members. “70 Days of Inaction,” the Washington Post detailed. There were memos released. That told of this destruction. Why did they not protect us?????? “It’s unforgivable!” Kathy said. Tears in her eyes as she mourned the D...

Let’s Hear it for Retail

I was a stock boy for a few years. Enjoyed it because all the pretty girls worked there and me and my buddy Tom would walk the tracks home with a couple of 8-packs of ponies. We always wanted to do a good job too, and it was often times hard working around the public. I recall an elderly guy walking up to me with a pie. He said, “Am I reading this right? Is this $2.99?” I said: “that’s what it says.” He dropped the pie on the floor. “You eat it for that price.” I laughed. I was thinking about that when I was in the grocery store, hiding behind my mask with a shirt on that I removed before I came back into my home. I would guess that 3 out of every 10 people had their face covered. One of the cashiers didn’t. The older man in front of me in line did. He offered his opinion to the cashier. “Why aren’t you wearing a mask?” He asked...kinda’ nastily. “I’m not paranoid,” she said. The conversation ended and the cashier moved on to my order. The man stormed away and ...

Trapped

Sunday that’s my fun day. My I don’t have to run day. Used to be. Yesterday was a little rough as the realization settled upon me. Still no week to plan. In fact, I’m pretty much grounded for the upcoming week based on the garbage way I felt this past week. “You have to follow the CDC guidelines unless you can get a test that shows you don’t have it.” That’s the shame of this. I’m not getting a test. There are sick people who need the tests. We’re a long way from testing people quickly. And, of course, we shouldn’t be. The lead up to this is absolutely disheartening. Every single ball that was in the air was dropped. And it goes back a long, long time. We just didn’t properly prepare. I saw that the surgeon general had posted a poem... ...Roses are red, violets are blue, the Coronavirus isn’t as bad as the flu.” He posted that in February after all of the sad projections were known to our leaders. There was a coordinated effort to downplay it all... ...stocks ...

Q Time Fun

Other than a few spins around the block with Melky and the Pair... ...I haven’t left my house in 10 days. Even the rides were rough when I didn’t feel great, but you don’t want to argue with a 14+ year old dog all day. You think I’m set in my ways??? You haven’t seen her. How to take up all the time? 1). Don’t over sleep, Don’t over eat, Don’t over anything! I’ve stayed to my bed and rising time. Like exactly. “Live a little,” my beautiful wife says, “stay up an extra 15 minutes.” “Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise,” I answered. “Well, you’re oh for three. You’re sick. I spent your money and you’re a dumb shit.” That was funny. As for the not over-eating part... ...when I struggled with the sickness (and I don’t know what it is? Somedays it felt like just a cold, when I was paranoid I thought about ventilators and all the while I watched the symptoms and prayed to the Rona gods to spare me) I didn’t feel like cooking so we ordered ...

Read This

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They gutted the response team. Denied the coming storm. Then downplayed it. Then sold their stocks. Now looking for a way to profit. As Americans die. Criminal Incompetence.

The Meteor Hits

Saw an article about a meteor smashing into the Earth and ending it all. The doomsday scenario is scheduled for April, 2020. As I read the article I saw a banner that ran across the bottom that said: “This news may be fake news.” I read it anyway. It told of complete and utter destruction of the planet and I considered these last few weeks. The writer explained that there would be no advance warning. Just BOOM! 💥 And I wondered what I might be doing at that precise moment... ...watching a show would be a good guess right about now. Reading? Sleeping? Fighting with Melky to get outside before she pees. All good guesses. Yet I was wondering. Would that be a good way for all of this to end? Just a big blast that sends us all hurtling into the great void. But then I think about judgement day. Would we all have to stand in line to go up or down? That would probably suck. But admit it: A meteor sounds pretty good right now. Doesn’t it?

One Hundred Thousand Lives

A hundred thousand people may lose their lives in the next couple of weeks. Here in America. It’s not an actual war. They’re projecting that more Americans will lose their life to the virus than 2 times the number of people who died in Vietnam. It’s inexcusable. We had all the information... ...in January. On March 9th...three freaking weeks ago...the nitwit tweeted that “the flu results in a lot of deaths every year. Think about that!” In February 18-ton of PPE was sent to China! Yesterday, nurses in Covid wards were wearing Yankees rain ponchos for PPE! Devin Nunes, two weeks ago, was telling people on Fox News that it was a “great time to go to the local pub because it’ll be easy to get in.” And they continue to bungle it! Do you realize that about 20 states don’t have any ‘stay-at-home’ instructions! People are still visiting beaches in Florida. On Tuesday afternoon I had a twitter discussion with a woman who tried to convince me that it’s “a hoax and anyo...

Healthcare Superheroes

When Jake needed help back in 2001 he was blessed to be treated by some of the best nurses and doctors in the country. I spent a lot of hours writing my book, ‘House of Miracles’ in an effort to thank them for their efforts. My wife, was also amazed by the strength and compassion of all who helped our son, so much so that she decided to study to become a nurse. For the last decade I’ve been amazed at her dedication to the job. I’ve watched her shed a number of tears for patients who were lost. I heard her recap of days that are too long, too tragic and so messed up. No breaks. No drinks on the floor. Holding your own pee until your ready to burst because you’re trying to help too many people with too few people. For too little pay. And I’m not going to lie here... ...I tuned out a lot of hours where she was venting about being short-staffed or worn out. Every single time I mentioned that she should take a day off... ...she would dismiss my thoughts. She had to get u...