We Do A Lot of Texting

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All righty then...

I just finished reading an article about the actor from Lost, Doug Hutchinson, who is 51 years old. I never saw the show, didn't know who he was before reading the article, and had to write his name down before I forgot it.

But he's doing all right, I suppose.

You see, he's recently married...to 16-year old Courtney Stodden.

Yep. He's 51 and she's 16. And it's all legal as far as I can tell.

Can you imagine?

All right, boys, stop imagining.

Because it is a tad weird, me thinks.

First of all, I'd probably have to drive a spike through her head. The other night my beautiful wife suggested a movie and I said, and I quote:

"It's kinda' getting late."

She laughed and it hurt my feelings. "It's 8:22," she said.

And I'm four years younger than this guy.

Of course, I saw the photo of the young wife. She's about what you'd think. Long blond hair, big round....

You get it.

But here's where the story got really creepy. Whoever was doing the interviewing asked them about their sex life.

"He's a tiger," she said.

"I wish I'd remained a virgin until I met her," he said.

Uh, how were you going to do that? You were 35 when she was freaking born.

I just don't see it lasting long. There isn't anything about this story that makes me think this guy can hang in for the long haul. Did they think it through?

When she's 36 he'll be 71.

When she's my age he'll be eighty-freaking-two.

I guess that's the way I'll look at it for perspective. If I did it like him, on one hand the girl that I will eventually marry is now in 6th grade. On the other hand...looking ahead...the woman that I'd have to be with would be Betty White's age.

When they asked the two about the unique courtship the guy bitched a bit about all of the texting that he had to do to win her heart.

Most likely that is the least of his problems going forward.

To each his own, I suppose, but isn't that illegal somehow?

Ah, who the hell knows.

I bet she makes him start movies well after 8 o'clock.

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