Sabatoge

Perhaps the worst and best of being laid up is that you have a lot of time to think. Unfortunately, sometimes the thinking comes in the middle of the night whenever everyone else is asleep, and there's no one to bounce things off of.

The conversations with Melky are a little one-sided and she hardly reacts unless I mention a squirrel somewhere in the message.

I'm reading a memoir of a girl who, during her formative years, slept with a lot of men as she searched for validation and love. A fairly common theme, I'm told, although those girls saw me as a good friend as I grew.

Yet the striking thing about it is the lengths that we all seem to go to in order to sabatoge our own efforts. We can do everything right for all the hours out of the week and then screw up the effort with a bad word, an hour of weakness, or a three-hour window where we forget to do the things we are supposed to do.

I'm not sure what to make out of all of it except to understand that as humans we are weak. We know the big picture and the right way to go about it, but we cave.

Growing up, the nuns taught us a lot about our conscious. That's a good thing, right? Listening to them, I never felt anything but guilty.

And as the protestors gather, I wonder what the conscious is like for some of the people who are out on yachts and living in a summer home while others suffer. They most likely don't feel a thing. How could they?

Newt Gingrich was talking tonight. Middle of the night, flipping by kind of thing.

"People should not get a handout, period, unless they have a severe disability."

I know we are all supposed to make our own way, but I find Newt's comment incredibily short-sighted. We don't all have the same opportunities no matter how good that sounds. It isn't the same for everyone. There are people without severe disabilities who are struggling in this new world order.

And the opportunties to sabotage our own lives are endless. It seems that every single day I read about a middle-aged man or woman convicted of embezzlement. Last night's news went like this:

Pedophile, embezzelment, fire, murder, celebrity jailed, sports and then weather.

People aren't bad. Over and over I need to tell myself that, but that's what we are fed, day after day...night after night.

Living the right way is harder than taking the low road. I'm hoping that I don't sabotage my efforts at all this week.

Gotta' go, there's a squirrel outside the window and Melky wants to have a conversation.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Suits

My Buddy, Dave

Mom & Ollie