$3,500 for Dinner

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All right so the whore that was in the room with Charlie Sheen is offended that he didn't treat her with respect, talking down at her, making her feel disrespected, and now she is filing a lawsuit because he has forever damaged her ability to make a living.

Don't get me wrong...Charlie Sheen has really acted like a drug-infested ass for a long time. Someone should let him know that he has kids, a following, and a responsibility to act like a human being, no matter how big a star he is or how great his show seems to be.

And where is CBS through all of this? Sheen has been arrested a bunch of times, has been in and out of rehab, and they don't say a word about it. Could it be because he is the star of their highest-rated show?

I wonder.

But back to Charlie's date...

Capri Anderson is the name the young lady goes by, and for all intents and purposes, she is a woman who seems to have taken good care of herself. Yet she is flabbergasted by Sheen's behavior.

It seems that the two struck a contract to have dinner. She was paid $3,500 for attending the dinner. She was shocked that there are some who felt that she would have to earn her dinner by taking care of Charlie.

I'm shocked too!

I am regularly invited to dinner by people and paid $3,500 just for my witty anecdotes and lovely personality. Perhaps Charlie thought that she would teach him something about mathematics or balancing the federal budget. Maybe he was just longing for her company because she seemed to be a girl-next-door-type that might mesh with his intoxicated lifestyle of debauchery.

And her reputation? Does being paid to have sex with a Hollywood moron diminish your ability to perform the reverse cowgirl in an X-rated film?

The whole things smacks of a setup if you ask me. Two morons caught up in a bad situation, and now we are all reading about it, and this tramp is being interviewed by every newspaper in the country and appearing on Good Morning America.

Let's see. What would you get if you paid me $3,500 to have dinner with you?

1). I would eat all the food you put in front of me. You can pay to watch me eat 72-ounces of beef, or a bushel of linguine.

Capri ain't doing that.

2). Charlie is a huge baseball fan and so am I. We can discuss the league champions back to World War II. I know he's an Angels fan, but Matsui was there last year. We could find some solid ground.

3). I can seriously pound booze right along with Charlie. I don't want any of his drugs, but I bet I can match him shot for shot if the Jameson's bottle comes out.

4). I will come in handy if he passes out. I can lift him into the elevator and carry him to his room. Then, if necessary, I would be able to head next door to put Denise Richards and the kids to sleep.

All for $3,500. No strings attached. Capri wasn't expecting to sleep with him, so I wouldn't either.

Besides, if he tried to choke me, I'd wipe the floor with his drunken ass.

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