Happy Father’s Day!

When I lost my Dad I spoke with a buddy of mine who had lost his Dad when he was way too young.

He suffered mightily while grieving.

“We are fortunate to be this sad,” he said, at my Dad’s wake.

“Huh?” I asked.

“‘Cause we really loved our Dads and our Dads really loved us. There are millions of people who don’t miss their Dad for even a minute when they pass.”

He was right.

He made me feel better.

All these years later, I know that my Dad wasn’t perfect, but who is?

I also learned how difficult it has been to stand in the shoes of being a father.

What I took from my Dad and used as a Dad:

1). Put everyone first.

I’m in last place around here. That’s how it should be. I took on the job and it comes with a whole lot of responsibility. 

Dad lived up to it.

I’ve tried every single day.

2). Let the kids know you love them.

Dad left zero doubt. He would write little notes. He would make a lot of calls. He’d invite me to dinner when I was in my 40’s and had my own family.

On his last Father’s Day he made all of us wait in the driveway as he searched the pantry for a can of anchovies that he wanted to gift me.

We shared a love of anchovies.

I think of him every time I have one.

3). Work hard but have some fun too!

Dad knew every joke. He remembered all of them. He was such a huge personality. If he was in a room that held 100 people everyone in that room knew where he was.

And one of my fondest memories was in finally telling him a joke that he hadn’t heard.

It was in the last year of his life and it was a joke that I borrowed from Willie Nelson.

Dad was seated across from me at a graduation party.

I told the joke and for the first time ever, he spit his drink across the table.

If I close my eyes, right now, I can still see that wonderful expression of glee and surprise that creased his face as he choked on that drink.

Happy Father’s Day!

And a special shout out to my father-in-law…

…another legendary guy.

I’m going to go tell him that joke.