The Streaker
The guy who ran on the field at the Ralph or Rich Stadium or New ERA or the cap or whatever the hell they call it...
...was the best Buffalo performer of the week.
The Bills got absolutely hammered (as they usually do in November) and late in the game the guy ran out Buck naked.
He went about 90 yards, got into the end zone (the Bills hadn't yet) and then tried to head back out. He was tackled hard.
Of course, I didn't see it on television, but his run was captured on video and flashed on all the social media outlets.
He was roundly congratulated for his efforts, but as per usual I took some time to think about his motivations.
His name isn't important, but he's 29 years old. He's also in good shape and has tattoos. I'm not sure how endowed he is.
I saw the g-rated video.
But, at 29, I wondered what sort of profession he was in. I'm not sure, but I think my boss and my company might frown on my participation in such an event.
Wife?
Kids?
I doubt he'd take such a jaunt if his immediate family was in the stands.
How about his Mom?
He probably has a Mom, right?
"Looked like fun," Sam said. "I'd do it."
"I'd kill you," I said.
And for the record, all of my kids are afraid of their own shadows. I don't think any of them could make such a run.
"I thought it was you," someone chided me on Facebook (Hi Kim).
"I wouldn't make it 5 yards," I answered. "They'd be taking me out on the cart."
The man was led into Orchard Park Court yesterday.
Criminal Trespass and Public Lewdness.
That's gotta be good on the resume.
He probably won't be allowed back into Rich Stadium again.
Banned for life!
Lucky bastard!!
If they really wanted to punish him they should make him go every week...
...no clothes for him.
Make him sit there on that frozen bench bare-assed.
He'd be the last streaker ever if that were his punishment.
That place is cold!!
Go Bills!!!
...was the best Buffalo performer of the week.
The Bills got absolutely hammered (as they usually do in November) and late in the game the guy ran out Buck naked.
He went about 90 yards, got into the end zone (the Bills hadn't yet) and then tried to head back out. He was tackled hard.
Of course, I didn't see it on television, but his run was captured on video and flashed on all the social media outlets.
He was roundly congratulated for his efforts, but as per usual I took some time to think about his motivations.
His name isn't important, but he's 29 years old. He's also in good shape and has tattoos. I'm not sure how endowed he is.
I saw the g-rated video.
But, at 29, I wondered what sort of profession he was in. I'm not sure, but I think my boss and my company might frown on my participation in such an event.
Wife?
Kids?
I doubt he'd take such a jaunt if his immediate family was in the stands.
How about his Mom?
He probably has a Mom, right?
"Looked like fun," Sam said. "I'd do it."
"I'd kill you," I said.
And for the record, all of my kids are afraid of their own shadows. I don't think any of them could make such a run.
"I thought it was you," someone chided me on Facebook (Hi Kim).
"I wouldn't make it 5 yards," I answered. "They'd be taking me out on the cart."
The man was led into Orchard Park Court yesterday.
Criminal Trespass and Public Lewdness.
That's gotta be good on the resume.
He probably won't be allowed back into Rich Stadium again.
Banned for life!
Lucky bastard!!
If they really wanted to punish him they should make him go every week...
...no clothes for him.
Make him sit there on that frozen bench bare-assed.
He'd be the last streaker ever if that were his punishment.
That place is cold!!
Go Bills!!!
Comments