Time to Re-Up?????

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On our wedding day, my beautiful wife agreed with me that we should run this marriage thing on five-year deals. We've actually made it swimmingly through the first three contracts, in some trying times, with little or no room for negotiation.

We both signed on without complication.

The last deal expires some time next week. We are both a little unsure about the day because unless we look at the plaque commemorating our nuptials neither of us knows if we were married on the 30th or 31st.

Whatever.

"This is a walk year," I said the other night as we settled down to watch a movie with that wimpy-looking Wahlberg guy.

(Why do we only see movies with Wahlberg or Gosling or Damon or Affleck?)

"Are you re-signing for five more years?" I asked.

"Yeah, I'm in," she said as she watched Wahlberg lift weights.

(She didn't even glance in my direction).

"Are you sure?" I asked. "There might be someone better suited for you out there."

"I don't have the ambition," she confessed. "What about you?"

"Not sure," I said. "It is my walk year, maybe this will be it."

"Really?" she asked.

I nodded convincingly.

"Really? Where are you walking to?"

"I don't know," I said.

(She was still concentrating on Wahlberg).

"You can't even walk up the stairs," she finally answered. "You better stick around here."

She's probably right.

So, on the 30th or 31st we will start work on a new five-year deal that will take us midway through the 2018 season.

At the rate I've been declining she just might take a flier on the next five year deal.

As Wahlberg stood before us without his shirt I asked the dumbest question of our marriage.

"You like guys with muscles like that?" I asked.

"Uh, yeah," she answered. "What would make you ask me that?"

"You just re-upped with a guy who doesn't have them," I said.

"That's all right," she said. "I'm tired all the time now."

(Isn't that just a beautiful love story?)

Happy Anniversary to my BEAUTIFUL WIFE - whenever it may be.

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