Nine Thousand Words
Read something the other day that wasn't all that startling.
They say that the average adult male speaks about two thousand words per day while the average adult woman speaks roughly nine thousand.
Of course there's a lot you can do with stats and it'd be a tough thing to prove, but take my word for it...that's just about right around here.
"How was your day?" to Jake.
"Great!"
"How was your day?" to Matt.
"Terrific."
"How was your day?" to me.
"Sucked."
Sam, the great male talker in our house is even getting with the program. We know very little about his troubles.
We have one female here.
She's over nine thousand words.
"How was your day?" I'll say.
An hour later.
"What're you gonna' do," I'll answer.
And I'm not sure what it's all about. The wonderful differences between the sexes. It makes the world go around. Perhaps the whole gay marriage thing is all about wanting or not wanting to hear the mate talk or not.
"But you write about five thousand words a day," Kathy reminded me.
Which is true, I suppose, but people don't have to hear me. They can not read it if they'd like.
And I certainly don't mind. Human contact is certainly appreciated. Hearing about someone's day is certainly better than not hearing from anyone at all. Yet it is tough to picture some of the people in some of the stories.
"Remember when I told you about Natale?" Kathy will ask.
I do the shake off and nod at the same time. (Which is a great move by the way when someone is talking your ear off. They aren't sure if you know what they're talking about. It's done with a quick nod and an immediate 'no' shake of the head. The confused look is worth the effort).
"She's the hot one, right?"
"No, she's not hot."
"Don't remember her."
That might get you clear of hearing about Natale, but to a 9,000 word a day person, it probably won't even be a bump in the road.
"Anyway, Natale said... and I said...and Natale said...Do you believe that?"
"Nope!"
Be sincere. Listen closely. Nod and shake all in one motion. Either way, it doesn't matter.
My poor wife.
She gets the same response no matter what slob she's talking to.
"Please tell us a work story," Jake will say as we sit at the table.
Kathy will show mock frustration and then guess what?
She tells us a work story.
"Terrific!" Jake will say. "I'm outta' here!"
But I'm the husband. I have a new tact.
I count the words backwards.
8,745, 8,744, 8,743, 8,742....
"No shit, Natale, huh?"
They say that the average adult male speaks about two thousand words per day while the average adult woman speaks roughly nine thousand.
Of course there's a lot you can do with stats and it'd be a tough thing to prove, but take my word for it...that's just about right around here.
"How was your day?" to Jake.
"Great!"
"How was your day?" to Matt.
"Terrific."
"How was your day?" to me.
"Sucked."
Sam, the great male talker in our house is even getting with the program. We know very little about his troubles.
We have one female here.
She's over nine thousand words.
"How was your day?" I'll say.
An hour later.
"What're you gonna' do," I'll answer.
And I'm not sure what it's all about. The wonderful differences between the sexes. It makes the world go around. Perhaps the whole gay marriage thing is all about wanting or not wanting to hear the mate talk or not.
"But you write about five thousand words a day," Kathy reminded me.
Which is true, I suppose, but people don't have to hear me. They can not read it if they'd like.
And I certainly don't mind. Human contact is certainly appreciated. Hearing about someone's day is certainly better than not hearing from anyone at all. Yet it is tough to picture some of the people in some of the stories.
"Remember when I told you about Natale?" Kathy will ask.
I do the shake off and nod at the same time. (Which is a great move by the way when someone is talking your ear off. They aren't sure if you know what they're talking about. It's done with a quick nod and an immediate 'no' shake of the head. The confused look is worth the effort).
"She's the hot one, right?"
"No, she's not hot."
"Don't remember her."
That might get you clear of hearing about Natale, but to a 9,000 word a day person, it probably won't even be a bump in the road.
"Anyway, Natale said... and I said...and Natale said...Do you believe that?"
"Nope!"
Be sincere. Listen closely. Nod and shake all in one motion. Either way, it doesn't matter.
My poor wife.
She gets the same response no matter what slob she's talking to.
"Please tell us a work story," Jake will say as we sit at the table.
Kathy will show mock frustration and then guess what?
She tells us a work story.
"Terrific!" Jake will say. "I'm outta' here!"
But I'm the husband. I have a new tact.
I count the words backwards.
8,745, 8,744, 8,743, 8,742....
"No shit, Natale, huh?"
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