Now June Cleaver is Gone

Sad news over the weekend...Beaver Cleaver's mother is gone.

Tell me you didn't watch that show. We all did. I remember asking my mother why she didn't wear a dress and earrings around the house...I shouldn't print her answer.

And the old man - Hugh Beaumont (How's that for a memory?) drove me crazy. He was always filled with such wise advice, not to mention that he wore a coat and tie as he dabbed at his mouth with a napkin at the dinner table.

Not to speak cross of my beloved Dad, but we used to fight for the seat furthest away from him, particularly if we were having sauce or corn on the cob - food was flying everywhere and God help you if you wore a white shirt sitting next to him as the frenzy began.

As a matter of fact, everything about the show sucked. Beaver was a dweeb. Wally was annoying. Neither one of them were very fleet of foot when it came to meeting the girls. Eddie Haskell was a tool.

Let me think...who did I like on that crap black and white show?

I got it...Lumpy. Remember Lumpy? He was a funny dude. Lumpy didn't try and play June and Ward. He was a little on the mental-deficient side, his nickname fit his profile, and he sort of taught Wally and the Beave a few things.

And how in the hell did that poor kid get the nickname Beaver?

That has to be disconcerting in this day and age, right? A play on the Cleaver name, I hope, and not a shot at describing him as something slang in regard to the female anatomy.

Oh well, June Cleaver has left us. Mom's everywhere took a hit.

Truthfully, I loved my Mom's honesty when I did ask her about wearing that dress.

11-year-old me: Mom, why don't you wear a dress like Beaver Cleaver's mother?

Mom: Go take a shit for yourself.

Okay, so it wasn't too graphic to print.

It's exactly what I thought of when I heard the tragic news. Thanks Mom.

Comments

nmallen said…
June Cleaver and now Tom Bosley. TV will never be the same.

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