It Might Be the Phone
I must admit.
There was a bit of panic involved.
My phone was vibrating and I couldn't see it to answer it.
The screen was completely black.
What do you do in such situations?
Yeah...push at every single button. I was turning up the volume in an effort to get a picture back.
And the phone had been showing signs. Every now and again it would fade out on me.
It wasn't even blinking back now.
It took me six frantic minutes to get the picture back and hold it long enough to return the call, but it was going to be a rough day.
Our phones have become way too important.
And I suppose that's the way someone wants it to be, but I answer e-mails. It's the only phone number any of my clients have for me. The customers are texting addresses now. I need the GPS to find said addresses. I have MLB.Com to get alerts when the Yankees are practicing. I check my baseball stats on there. The pictures! Oh my God, what if I lose my photos? And my apps. I have a slot machine game that I need to update every day and Sam is working on the Family Guy stuff with me.
Please God!
Not my phone!!
So, I stopped into the local Verizon store and seven kids came rushing at me.
"Can I help you?" each one of them asked.
I had hit it at the right time. The place wasn't busy. I had my pick of the sales people.
So...
...I picked the prettiest one and she grabbed my phone and played around for it for a moment.
"Yeah," she said. "It's like, cooked."
(Don't always go for pretty, kids).
A much less pretty guy grabbed it from her hand, asked me for the phone number, consulted an I-pad at his hip and said:
"You have a warranty. We can replace it for free."
"Free?" I asked. "Like...in nothing? No free phone and $400 shipping charge?"
He laughed.
The pretty one drifted away.
(She had been of such help).
"Or you can upgrade for $150 and a change in data plans."
"I'll take free," I said. "Where is it?"
"Oh, we have to mail it to you. You should have it on Monday."
I thought of the weekend without my phone. There were Family Guy upgrades to handle and I needed to set my baseball lineups.
"Best we can do. You can walk out of here with the upgrade today."
Bastards.
But I held fast.
"Send me the free one," I said.
As I left the store I thought about the fact that had I went for the upgrade they would've changed my data plan, and the damn phone might've cost me $200 a month.
I also thought of my brother John who, as we were growing up, used to say the same thing every time the house phone rang:
"Get that. It might be the phone."
They got us, people.
We are slaves to our damn phones.
There was a bit of panic involved.
My phone was vibrating and I couldn't see it to answer it.
The screen was completely black.
What do you do in such situations?
Yeah...push at every single button. I was turning up the volume in an effort to get a picture back.
And the phone had been showing signs. Every now and again it would fade out on me.
It wasn't even blinking back now.
It took me six frantic minutes to get the picture back and hold it long enough to return the call, but it was going to be a rough day.
Our phones have become way too important.
And I suppose that's the way someone wants it to be, but I answer e-mails. It's the only phone number any of my clients have for me. The customers are texting addresses now. I need the GPS to find said addresses. I have MLB.Com to get alerts when the Yankees are practicing. I check my baseball stats on there. The pictures! Oh my God, what if I lose my photos? And my apps. I have a slot machine game that I need to update every day and Sam is working on the Family Guy stuff with me.
Please God!
Not my phone!!
So, I stopped into the local Verizon store and seven kids came rushing at me.
"Can I help you?" each one of them asked.
I had hit it at the right time. The place wasn't busy. I had my pick of the sales people.
So...
...I picked the prettiest one and she grabbed my phone and played around for it for a moment.
"Yeah," she said. "It's like, cooked."
(Don't always go for pretty, kids).
A much less pretty guy grabbed it from her hand, asked me for the phone number, consulted an I-pad at his hip and said:
"You have a warranty. We can replace it for free."
"Free?" I asked. "Like...in nothing? No free phone and $400 shipping charge?"
He laughed.
The pretty one drifted away.
(She had been of such help).
"Or you can upgrade for $150 and a change in data plans."
"I'll take free," I said. "Where is it?"
"Oh, we have to mail it to you. You should have it on Monday."
I thought of the weekend without my phone. There were Family Guy upgrades to handle and I needed to set my baseball lineups.
"Best we can do. You can walk out of here with the upgrade today."
Bastards.
But I held fast.
"Send me the free one," I said.
As I left the store I thought about the fact that had I went for the upgrade they would've changed my data plan, and the damn phone might've cost me $200 a month.
I also thought of my brother John who, as we were growing up, used to say the same thing every time the house phone rang:
"Get that. It might be the phone."
They got us, people.
We are slaves to our damn phones.
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