Breaking Back Into Shawshank

So went to a wedding of one of my oldest friends. He's a happy man. This is his 2nd marriage, and he is ready to roll into another new exciting part of life.

Good for him.

He can have it.

During the wedding vows, I whispered to my beautiful wife:

"Can you imagine actually going through marriage again? I'd rather hang myself from a low-hanging beam."

For an unknown reason my wife seemed to take my comment wrong.

"Oh come on," she said.

Yet it was way less about her but about the energy that is needed to put that much time and effort into something new.

And as per usual I had to get up in front of the gathering to do a reading about love and say a few words.

I guess what I said was funny, but I sort of didn't even mean to do it:

"Tom is one of my oldest friends. I've known him for about 40 years. And Brenna, well...good luck."

The gathering laughed. I'd really just meant to say 'good luck', but with marriage, it's always the groom that takes the initial beating, I suppose.

"He just pissed away 90 percent of his money," I whispered when Tom said, 'I do.'

And in this day and age the whole love thing is better served if marriage was set up like a business deal.

I'm not cynical.

It should just be set up that way. It truly is the biggest business deal that most people ever enter, and it certainly can get ugly.

"We're getting married in August," one of the couples seated at my table said.

I immediately went into my comedy sketch about how there was still time to be sensible.

"I've been married twice before," the guy said.

"And you're still willing to break back into Shawshank?" I asked.

"It feels right this time," they both said in unison and then they laughed about how cute it was that their minds were in synch.

"It beats being alone," the guy said.

"Really?" I asked. "We just celebrated our wedding anniversary...on the wrong freaking day!"

We told the story and they laughed.

On the way home we talked about it at length.

Married again?

"You ruined it for everyone," I told my wife. "Think of all the young, hot girls who now have to suffer."

"Yeah, they're really missing out."

Love and marriage. Love and marriage.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Suits

My Buddy, Dave

Hot & Dusty