Buffalo...Sweet Buffalo!

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Then she sneezed again.

My companion.

Then the dog cried.

Then she blew her nose.

Sneeze.

Blow the nose.

Sneeze.

Blow the freaking nose!

"So where you from?" she asked. Her diseased face just inches from mine.

I crumpled into a ball beside her and turn my head to the window.

"Buffalo," I muttered.

I held my book up to cover my face. I thought about making a mask out of the freaking (not the real word) puke bag.

"Do you like to travel?" she asked.

She sneezed.

Coughed.

And might've farted.

All I could think was that I needed to crack a window. Not a bright idea at 35,000 feet but it was tempting.

"I hate traveling," I said.

I almost added "NOW!"

and

"BECAUSE OF YOU."

I really wanted to tell her that I hated her and that I knew why her dog was crying.

He wanted out!

He wanted to get away from her.

Sneeze, cough, sneeze.

The tissue she was using was just a tiny piece of paper. She rammed it in her nose...and then accepted my bag of Cheese Nips from the stewardess.

She extended them to me with a smile.

"NOOOOOOOOOOO!" I screamed. "I'm allergic to snot covered cheese."

All right, I actually didn't say it, but I didn't touch them either.

I hate that freaking lady.

As I was getting off the plane in Chicago I turned my cell phone on.

Three more hours and I'd be home.

I had a message.

It was from the airline.

"Sorry for the inconvenience but your flight from Chicago to Buffalo has been cancelled. Thank you."

Long story short.

It took me five hours to make it home.

I spent three of those hours washing my hands in the Chicago airport.

So much fun to travel!

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