Philadelphia Freedom

So...made a trip to the Philly area this week.

I have friends who live in the area who are probably a little agitated that I didn't lengthen the trip to stop by and say 'hello' but it really was just a quick work trip to do something that I enjoy doing:

Making a speech in regard to construction safety.

You see, I created a bit of a monster when I made the trip to Las Vegas back in January. I had stood in front of a room filled with people from all over the country and I had done my usual stand-up safety act.

Through the years I have been around a lot of construction folks who've done a whole lot of dumb things.

In my time as a 'handyman' and in my days as a construction laborer I did a whole bunch of dumb things myself.

And I've turned it all into a speech...

...that makes folks laugh when I tell it.

In fact, I feel a bit like Louis C.K. when I'm going through the main points of it all, and let me tell you, there's nothing in the world like making an entire room of people laugh.

It's like a drug.

One joke leads to another and in Vegas I got on such a roll that I honestly wasn't quite sure what I was even talking about.

Following my time on stages really strange things happen because people want to talk to me. Mostly they want me to say something funny.

"I'm up in my room," I told my beautiful wife during the Vegas trip. "Too many people are trying to talk to me!"

Yet being comfortable enough to speak to rooms full of strangers goes way back to my college days.

I just never get nervous in that setting.

"What do you need for your speech?" The event planners asked me before the Vegas and Philly talks.

"Nothing."

"We can put your notes up on the screen so the audience can follow along," one woman said.

"I don't have any notes."

"We'll have a projector there for you to use and you can just plug into our computer."

"I won't be bringing anything."

The woman who was setting up the Vegas event was completely lost. She was silent for so long that I had to ask if she was still on the phone.

"Well," she finally said. "My butt is on the line if you bomb."

"I won't bomb."

She waited a long while again.

"Can you give me a hint?" she asked.

"Not really."

Yet they let me go on anyway.

Following that Vegas speech the event planner came up to me.

"How in the heck?"

We both laughed.

Then she hugged me.

"You made me look great!"

When I stood before the room in Philly I thought a lot about the first speech that I made way back in college.

I had written out one sentence:

'Walk tall, or don't walk at all.'

It's the only note I ever need in mind as I speak.

The rest is just a whole lot about laughing, acting human, and trying not to say the very worst words that I know.

Philly was fun even if I didn't see anything other than a bunch of folks who thought they were gonna' be bored out of their minds at a safety talk.

I didn't bomb.

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