If It'll Please the Court
Spent a bit of time the other day listening to two guys tell me about their divorces.
We all laughed a lot at the guy who was reprimanded by the judge for saying:
"No wonder 48 Hours is able to do a show about a husband killing his estranged wife every week."
That little comment got him a restraining order.
Which forced him to have to beg to see his kids.
Who were living in the house he bought and paid for...
...before he met his wife...
...who started the whole fight...
...by pleasuring the next-door neighbor...
...on the couch he bought.
"I had to give her the whole house," the guy said, "because when I caught her, in mid-act, mind you, I left the house instead of just strangling her and him where they lay. The judge said I abandoned the family by leaving and that because of that she got the house."
And yes. He had bought and paid for the house years before he met her.
"That ain't right," I said.
He laughed.
"No shit! But I'm just thankful that I let it go. I seriously thought about doing some real bad things in the days immediately following the event, but I got through it. It cost me $90 grand, but whatever. In the end it's not about the money."
I was sort of fascinated. I also wanted to bust his chops.
"Remember how much you loved her?" I asked.
"Remember how you pledged your love in a church filled with people? In sickness and in health? Till death do you part?"
The guy just stared me down.
"They do 48 Hours about drywall guys who bludgeon their safety man too," he said.
I laughed.
He didn't.
"Can you buy me a house as a parting gift?" I asked.
"You better run!"
We all laughed a lot at the guy who was reprimanded by the judge for saying:
"No wonder 48 Hours is able to do a show about a husband killing his estranged wife every week."
That little comment got him a restraining order.
Which forced him to have to beg to see his kids.
Who were living in the house he bought and paid for...
...before he met his wife...
...who started the whole fight...
...by pleasuring the next-door neighbor...
...on the couch he bought.
"I had to give her the whole house," the guy said, "because when I caught her, in mid-act, mind you, I left the house instead of just strangling her and him where they lay. The judge said I abandoned the family by leaving and that because of that she got the house."
And yes. He had bought and paid for the house years before he met her.
"That ain't right," I said.
He laughed.
"No shit! But I'm just thankful that I let it go. I seriously thought about doing some real bad things in the days immediately following the event, but I got through it. It cost me $90 grand, but whatever. In the end it's not about the money."
I was sort of fascinated. I also wanted to bust his chops.
"Remember how much you loved her?" I asked.
"Remember how you pledged your love in a church filled with people? In sickness and in health? Till death do you part?"
The guy just stared me down.
"They do 48 Hours about drywall guys who bludgeon their safety man too," he said.
I laughed.
He didn't.
"Can you buy me a house as a parting gift?" I asked.
"You better run!"
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