Jingle Bell Rock

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I was woken from a sound sleep last night by the lyrics of the song, Jingle Bell Rock in my head.

Now I'm not much of a Christmas song guy, and hate most of the tunes, but that one is particularly bothersome, and I'm not sure where I heard it and why it woke me at 3:11 on Friday morning, but there I was, with my phone in my hand, looking up the lyrics.

There is something seriously wrong with the guy who wrote that song:

Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock
jingle bells swing and jingle bells ring
snowing and blowing up bushels of fun
now the jingle hop has begun.

What the F are you smoking????

Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock
jingle bells chime in jingle bells time
dancing and prancing in jingle bell square
in the frosty air.

Dancing and prancing in jingle bell square?

Seriously??

What a bright time, it's the right time
to rock the night away
Jingle bell time, it's a swell time
to go gliding in a one-horse sleigh
Giddy-up jingle horse, pick up your feet
jingle around the clock.

For shits and giggles I'm gonna' tell my boys that 'it's a swell time to go gliding in a one-horse sleigh.'

They'll put me in a home.

And giddy-up jingle horse, pick up your feet!

Is he talking to the horse?

Does he call him jingle horse?

What happened to a name like Mr. Ed?

Jingle horse!!!

Mix and-a-mingle in the jingling feet
That's the jingle bell
That's the jingle bell
That's the jingle bell rock.

Mix and a mingle in the jingling feet???

What???????

I couldn't even go back to sleep.

Holy shit!

(Happy Birthday to Lisa Zocco)

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