Preying On People

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Snowbound with the television going isn't the best recipe for getting your mind going. Thankfully there has been a lot of football on the past two weekends. Hell, yesterday I didn't put my shoes on even once.

Of course, the downside of it is that I've had the chance to see a lot of the news - from the trouble in the Gaza Strip to the Madoff rip-off of seemingly every person in America there's a lot to get you thinking.

Yet what caught my attention most are the endless advertisements from the lawyers who want to help you sue someone, anyone, for millions of dollars. The ads run every ten minutes and they offer promise. "You have a cold? It might be from pollution at your desk at work. Call us for free, and we'll make you a millionaire."

Here in the Buffalo area we have a lawyer who's name rhymes with car - so he has become an expert in suing other drivers who may have been in that automobile that banged into you on the freeway. "Hurt in a car, call, Jim Barr." (Not the real name).

Good old Sam laughs at the commercial every time. Hell, an eight-year-old sees through it. Yesterday, Sam was changing the words to the commercial on his own - "Drunk at a bar, call, Jim Barr." Sam yelled out when the commercial started.

The next time he screamed, "Can't see too far, call, Jim Barr."

We went back and forth for awhile on it and Sam finally asked, "Why? Why is this guy looking for money?"

There's no easy answer, I suppose, but it is clear that lawyers have changed the world we live in. I remember growing up, we were always playing at someone else's house. We always were getting bit by someone else's dog, or falling down someone else's stairs. My parents didn't think of suing. Their parents didn't think of suing.

Growing up, I can't remember even a single jingle of a lawyer's ad. Now my kids can sing the jingles as though its just a continuation of Barney's "I Love You."

So we all buy more insurance. We fear our neighbors and the stranger driving next to us. We cringe when someone comes to the door holding a subpoena. There's more fraud, less trust, and hundreds of countless jingles.

I usually mute these types of lawyers as soon as I see their bald heads and fake looks of concern. I think of the putrid lawyer who sat before me when Jake was sick, asking me if there was a "good chance that he'd have long-term damage."

There's an old joke about a lawyer and a raccoon on the side of the road with the difference being that there are skid marks in front of the raccoon.

Sam's best line of the day?

"Stuck in a jar, call, Jim Barr."

Comments

John said…
Laughed out loud twice. Thank you Sam!
11 January, 2009
John said…
Covered in tar? Wish on a star?
12 January, 2009
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