Thoughts of a Common Man

Our phones made a high-pitched squeal and then the television made the same sound. The world being warned about the coming snow. One foot, two feet, three feet, four… …I didn’t read the entire alert. The Thruway closer and thus far the snow was well south: “We’ll get it over night,” I said. Yet, I woke up to green grass. Played a game with Ollie - being sure to bring the ball in so it doesn’t get buried. “Maybe it’ll miss us completely,” I thought. Laughed. That ain’t happening. Can’t do Turkey anymore… …grabbed a couple of porterhouse steaks for me and Sam. As I was leaving the store a woman passed by me - she pointed to the huge grey mass that the sky had become. “Looks like we’re going to Kansas, Toto.” I laughed. Stay warm. It’s a coming.

Last weekend was the first weekend without golf. Missed it. This coming weekend we are hearing about the coming snowfall. One to three feet possible. “I can’t shovel this shit,” I announced. Camp Clifford was silent. There’s only one son here, and he ain’t shoveling either. Thankfully we have plows around and if we get the absurd amounts I have a contractor. “You better get your footballs in the house,” I told Oliver, “Or we won’t see them until spring.” We can still play in the snow but not if we can’t find the ball. And, of course, the snow hasn’t stuck around long even when it has landed in feet. Over the last several years it’s gone to 60 within a couple of weeks and everything melts. But the Bills play home Sunday night against the 49ers… …a heavyweight matchup. Two of the boys are going. Weather forecast is for 30 mph winds and 6 inches of snow at the NIGHT game! I don’t even have a dollar figure on what it might take for me to go… …just say the Bills and Erie County would have t...

I have a 16-pound turkey for 5 of us. Stuffing, potatoes, rolls, veggies, shrimp… …pies and I’m sure the boys will watch football… Thing is, I never sweat cooking on Thanksgiving because Turkey is Kathy’s favorite and I make this dinner a half-dozen times a year. I’m kind of excited for the 4 straight days off.  It was one of those short weeks where way too much garbage was going on all at once. This year seems different somehow as there’s a lot of talk about in-fighting in families because of politics. Not the America we’ve had for much of my life… …feels different as we wait to see what the hell happens. I’ve spent 3 weeks listening to Rock & Roll.  Tom Petty has emerged this week as I found some of his songs that I always loved but haven’t heard in a while. Music is my time capsule and listening to a song by James McMurtry from 1987 had me thinking about being 22 years old and trying to chase down life. Time passes. We will probably end up all right, but you know what I...

It’s a big drinking night, right? I was planning on easing into the long weekend, but had a really early start - the freaking day before Thanksgiving. Back in the day, I was up for all sorts of shenanigans the night before Thanksgiving. I recall a night of drinking at the Den where I went straight Bloody Mary’s. Tasted good… …tough hangover. In college, my buddy George and I stopped for one before hitting the road. Me to Buffalo and George to Meadville. One turned into enough to keep us both in Erie for an extra night and my Mom wasn’t thrilled with me when I walked in the door just an hour before dinner was served. Back in those days, no one could get a hold of anyone else at the drop of a hat. “Why didn’t you call?” Mom asked. “We didn’t pay the phone bill.” And I’m pretty happy that I don’t drink very much at all because I didn’t eat enough as I could back in the day. It’s funny but the one Thanksgiving I always go back to was 1986. We were out in California. Most of the family had ...

The goofiest story of the year - every year - took place. President Biden pardoned 2 turkeys yesterday at a ceremony that probably cost a lot of money. This year it seems truly weird because it certainly seems that all rules are out the window. “My, my, my these are lawless times.” Right under the turkey parson story was the story that Jack Smith dropped the case against the guy who started the insurrection. Following that was a story about the new FCC guy saying that he’s going to target people who talk badly about the new administration. Under that was the story about the incoming guy saying that he was not going to sign the ethics agreement that every other president has signed on the way into office. Trying hard not to dwell on any of this, but it appears that we are no longer operating as a Democracy that is beholden to a constitution. Elon Musk is putting out notice that governors will be arrested if they don’t follow the directives put forth by the Federal government. That’s new...

Mom loves hearing stories about my dog, Ollie, and my cat, Miller. She’s specifically interested in Miller because she’s never had a cat, and until Miller, neither had I. “He gets along with the dog?” “He loves them and they love him. He thinks he’s a dog.” I showed Mom a photo of Miller, and as luck might have had it, she had a picture of a cat in her new adult coloring book. Last week, she worked on the picture. On Saturday, she made sure that she gave me the colored picture to “show Miller.” Miller didn’t care, but man, I love it. We have coffee and cookies and watch either ‘Gunsmoke’ or ‘Mike & Molly.’ We talk about the old days, and Mom is doing well. She’s always smiling and our time together is always free and easy. Mom is 85 today. When I mentioned that I’d just turned 60 she asked: “How did my kids get so freaking old?” Made me laugh. Happy Birthday, Mom! We love you!!! Miller said, “Thank you!”

I had a pretty big Saturday morning that no one will even get until sometime next year when I pull the trigger. I finished the first draft of the next book, which is a collection of 20 stories. Calling it: “Telling Stories.” It was a massive project that started about 2 years ago, and it was an absolute blast. I didn’t have much of a plan other than to write whatever the hell I wanted to write about, and no sooner did I finish one story when I had the idea for the next one. When the story idea hit me I’d write the first few pages, and trap them under the title: “Story 1, 2, 3, 4, 5…” At one point I had about 7 different chapter stories that I was working on at one time. I’d work on whatever one fit my mood. Then I would type the completed stories onto my computer, doing the rewrite as I typed. Somehow I had half of story 19 and just a few pages of story 5 left on Saturday morning. One huge mug of copy and I finished off 19. A second huge mug had me thinking about finishing number 5 whi...

I watched an interview of Mike Tyson. The reporter asked him about his legacy and Mike laughed saying that he didn’t care at all about his legacy because: “I’ll be dead. What would I care?” I laughed. He has a point. Cut to Friday morning. I was at a high school in downtown Buffalo and I was a little taken aback by how run-down the building was.  Inner city schools are a lot different than some of the schools in the fancy suburbs. We got into a beat-up elevator, and I wondered if we were going to even make it to the top floor. I looked for the safety inspection paperwork, but instead spotted a plaque for Eddie the Elevator Man who was pictured in a Yankees hat. A black man who’d lived from 1945-2017, but was obviously beloved. Eddie has a plaque that is there for all to see. Legacy. I thought about the man.  He was wearing a huge smile that I imagined that he flashed in that elevator for decades. The contractor that I was riding with tried to stop the elevator even with the fl...

We are taught as children that we should try and be polite. I heard a woman on a television show say, “It’s my humble pleasure to meet you.” That’s polite! I was on a site the other day and a guy was telling a long story. My departing line was: “I gotta’ go, you’re boring the shit out of me.” That’s not polite… …got a good laugh though. When we were kids we had to write thank-you notes for presents from our aunts and uncles. People still do at least that much! But, you must agree that we have become less polite as a society - particularly in the last half-dozen years. I have friends - and a sister - who are really good at remembering to say something nice… …I wish I was better at it, honestly. I don’t tell everyone I meet that they’re boring the shit out of me, but I don’t say much one way or another either. I do ALWAYS wave if someone lets me in when I’m in traffic… …but it seems like people do that less and less now. If I have a pet peeve it’s a lack of politeness when I allow a pede...

“You gotta’ stand for something, or you’ll fall for anything.” John Mellencamp. Mika and Joe from the Morning Joe Show went to Mar-a-Lardo to kiss the ring of a man who deserves zero grace. ‘Disappointed’ was the first word that came to mind, but that soon shifted to ‘Disbelief.’ How can one even do that? Morning Joe was an interesting listen in the months before the election because they didn’t hold back when talking about the fraud, the stealing of classified documents, the crass, idiotic, nonsensical campaign and the fact that everything out of the orange-tinged mouth was a lie. Mere weeks later, they’re there trying to make amends. He accused Joe of murder!!! Spread the story as it were gospel truth when a woman that Joe knew had a tragic accident. The girl’s parents begged for it to come to a stop…. …that didn’t work. I’ve only been thoroughly disgusted a few times - to the point where I had to cut someone completely out of my life. I went out with a girl who cheated on me. I real...

Back to back episodes of Yellowstone and Landman… …it’s great television. I’m also a fan of the old time shows like Columbo and All in the Family… …makes me laugh a little when people say things like, “they don’t make good television anymore.” These are the golden days of entertainment. Billy Bob is great. So is Kevin Costner. We enjoyed The Sopranos and Breaking Bad and Dexter. We’re fans of Shrinking. Shows that cover all sorts of dark subjects and bring laughs and absolute drama. As we watched the latest episode of Yellowstone I mentioned how long the episode was… …more than an hour. They make 10-15 episodes a season of a good show.  The big actors are now doing long-running series and it seems that movie theaters are only for the super hero things. At the same time, on Sunday morning I watched three straight episodes of ‘Golden Girls’ as I worked on some writing. Kathy came out as the third episode finished up. “Are you kidding me?” She asked. “Watch it, it’s funny,” I said. “I...

Elon Musk always struck me as someone who was a tad off, but a lot of my news came from scrolling through Twitter and when Musk bought it and it went to X - which was weird - I held my nose and continued to scroll. This last month or so was too much. I think I became an official Twitter quitter when I saw him dancing like a weirdo on a political stage. Enough is enough. Now, one of the reasons why I didn’t switch to something else is because I’m technology challenged. I don’t know a whole lot about adding apps, or remembering passwords or even coming up with them. As is well documented, I have troubles turning on the television from time-to-time. So, I was hesitant, but it didn’t take much for me to make the switch and I was able to find the people I communicate with - it’s just the same two guys I golf with and a couple of people I picked up along the way. Then I’m looking for baseball news, Springsteen and Stones updates and a few jokes here or there. I don’t want or need political u...

There’s a report that the incoming disaster is telling unqualified people that he’s picked to do jobs they have no business doing that… …they’re no longer taking an oath to protect the constitution. There was also a report that military leaders who stood in protest may be court-martialed based on their lack of loyalty. Made me think of a Knopfler song on one of his solo albums where the narrator in the story goes through it one night and ends up being dumped by his love. “I looked in the mirror at the face that I deserved.” That’s where we are all at. I’m done with the worry and despair. We deserve what is going to happen… …even if it’s a thorough trashing of the constitution and the Democracy. As sick as that sounds… …we will all look into the mirror at the face we deserve. Economically the destruction of the working class began decades ago when we first bought the trickle down bullshit. Socially we went sideways when we allowed someone to thoroughly trash races of people, degrade gen...

I suppose that I got sucked into the Tyson-Paul fight a little bit… …not enough to stay up until Midnight to watch it because Netflix couldn’t handle the millions who wanted to view it. (Which says something). Tyson is 58 years old. What ever made anyone believe that he could win a fight against someone 30 years younger? We are all living it! Physically, what can you do like you used to? I have a buddy who still plays rec basketball even though he’s in his 60’s. That’s kind of incredible.  I miss playing basketball. I used to be a decent shooter.  A few years back my boys tossed me the ball for a 15-feet shot as I exited my car after work. The ball felt the same in my hand and the shot looked the same. I left it 4 feet short. Everything hurt after I hoisted it. It’s kind of like the car depreciating as it leaves the lot… …we get worse. Yet, I can hit a golf ball better now than I was 18. I suppose it’s why I love playing so much. Iron Mike isn’t iron anymore. But millions got ...

Caught a movie. “Rob Peace” which was based on a true story. It was a story that was right up my alley about a black man convicted of a crime he may not have committed. I won’t give up much more, but early on, the founding statement of the boy’s prep school was: “Whatever hurts my brother, hurts me.” It’s a statement that seems lost in today’s world. There certainly seems to be a true moving away from such a philosophy. “I got mine, screw you!”  Seems much more appropriate. There’s a true nastiness afoot - especially on social media. “Detach,” one friend said. “It’s the only way you’ll stay sane.” He has a point. I watched a white man in his mid-40’s at a Five Guys - the man felt that he was kept waiting too long: “Let’s go, beaners! Give me my food before you all get deported.” Another man went to a board meeting in his town. He explained that his community was being ruined by “N-words.” Emboldened and entitled. That hurts my brothers. Such behavior hurts all of us. It’s been a sa...

I’ve always liked Kevin Costner. He was great in ‘Tin Cup’. He also holds the distinction of being in the first movie we ever ordered straight to our television. It was ‘Water World’ which I also liked even though everyone else hated it. I may have liked it because I couldn’t believe we could just order up a movie and it would play right on the television. Costner was also good as John Dutton - the Dad on Yellowstone - even though everyone in the show is kind of loathsome. A show about cowboys on the huge ranch chasing money and killing one another. And they killed off Costner because he didn’t sign a new contract. Yet, here we are - we watched the first half of season five again and caught the first episode. It’s a crazy story and one that makes us say: “She’s an asshole,” about three times every episode. What gets me about it is that I’ve seen pickups - here in Buffalo - adorned with the Yellowstone insignia and ‘Dutton Ranch’. That’s weird to me! Do the drivers of such vehicles trul...

Usually I can tell when I threw my back out. Not this time… …it started aching on Tuesday afternoon. By late Wednesday it was readily apparent that I wasn’t gonna’ fix it with ice and heat… …gotta get the massage. “Why don’t you take a couple of days off?” Jake asked. I laughed. “Scheduled to the teeth.” “How’s your back?” Kathy texted. “Great. Climbing ladders fixed it!” I replied. And it’ll come around, it always does. Most of what happens is that the muscles in my legs get too tight and then I have to deal with it. I have a massage therapist who destroys me for an hour and by the time I get home… …I’m right as rain. Yet, it’s wild. When your back hurts it’s hard to have many other thoughts, and Ollie doesn’t care. He dropped the ball for me as soon as I headed through the door. “Let’s go,” I said. “Get the blue one.” And mentioning the color was for my amusement. Ollie has a red football, a purple football, a yellow football, two blue footballs and one that is multi-colored that I c...

There’s been a lot of hand-wringing in this past week which has felt like a decade. It seems that a lot of people who voted for Harris are completely done with people who voted the other way. How does that play out over the next four years? I ran into a guy on a site who made no bones about who he voted for. “Gas prices went down this week,” he said. “It’s good to have a real president again.” I laughed. “He’s not the president,” I said. “Joe Biden is.” “Big oil knows he’s coming,” he said. “They’re scared.” I laughed again. Maybe that’s the way through this… …just laugh at the stupid. I may laugh myself into a coma, given who has been placed in positions of leadership. Yet I have a lot of friends, close friends and family members who certainly have never agreed with my political views… …which was always okay with me. Two parties… …differing stances. Yet, this is different. As has often been pointed out, voting that way doesn’t make you a racist, but it makes it clear that you’re okay ...

I’ve spent the better part of the last week just escaping the reality of what may be happening. A lot of Rock & Roll. Starting Five and Yellowstone. Caught a couple of movies, including a Nic Cage flick. We have a saying around here: “There’s no such thing as a bad Nic Cage movie.” What I didn’t do? Fret about the consequences of a truly misguided choice. I didn’t pay much attention to the fact that the numbers don’t appear right. I avoided even rumors about what might be enacted. But herein lies the problem: I have been engaged all my life to the future and I’ve been good about paying attention. How do I stay in this protective bubble for about 1,500 days? Will the bubble be popped??? I’ve had a bad feeling for about a decade now because I don’t trust Putin, and I’m afraid that he is now involved in my future. Mouth shut. Head down. Nic Cage on my television screen. Jagger, Springsteen, Mellencamp and Seger singing to me. And a pit the size of a watermelon in my stomach.

I was a tad skeptical on Friday night after checking the morning temperatures. “It’s going to be 39 degrees when you tee off,” Kathy said. “Ah well, tough week,” I said. “I’ll still be outside with a golf club in my hand.” The sun was bright! My car was showing me that the outside temp was 45. I had a hoodie and Yankees sweatpants on. The parking lot was empty. JC already had his clubs on the cart, and an orange Gatorade in the cup holder. “We’re ready to go,” he said. Five minutes later, I was at my ball in the middle of the fairway, exactly where I’d hit it. And we played the entire round in just two and a half hours. There was zero wind. The course was dry. The ball bounced and moved through the air as though it were the middle of June. I had a half-dozen pars, missed some easy putts and hit a few lousy shots too. On 18, I had a gimme putt for a par and I mentioned that it might be a good way to end the year. “Weather looks better next week,” John said. We made another tee time for ...

Life doesn’t stay where it’s at. It’s always moving forward. Was thinking about the old days… …the really old days… …when we would get a pickup baseball game going at the big house on the hill. All the kids coming from all over the neighborhood. We’d choose up sides and play with a tennis ball and our aluminum bats. So many games.  A ball went into the pool and it was a homer. I kept track of the league leaders. Perhaps the last time we played was when my buddy Jeff hit one of the house… …which was a shot… …bringing my irate Dad out of the house. There was a last time when I hung out with all my college friends. I remember that night because we all went to a bar after graduation and one by one my buddies left, and I was there at the end, looking at the entrance, waiting for them to come back. There was a last time when the kids were all here, still under my control, eating dinner, talking about what needed to be done. A last time for everything, and we usually don’t know when it mi...

 — Hands by Jewel —- “If I could tell the world just one thing  It would be that we’re all okay. Not to worry ‘cause worry is wasteful And useless in times like these. Our hands are small, nice weapons of conscience  If they are not idled by despair. We gather ourselves around our faithful light As the darkness most feared. Our hands are small, I know  But they’re not yours, they are my own And we shall not go unbroken. Some things are sold to a higher law You do not own us, you never saw You won’t use my hands to fight your wars, To close your eyes To cripple your doors Because just getting by isn’t enough And neither is welfare or thankless jobs Because where there is a man who has no voice  There our shackles sing. My hands are small, I know But they’re not your hands, they are my own And in the end Only kindness matters. In the end. Only kindness matters.”

Benjamin Orr was a member of the band The Cars - he was the lead singer on Drive and a couple of their other hits. He also put out a really good solo record, but tragically, he died young. The solo album is good and I love when they turn up on my music shuffle. “This Time Around” is a very good song, and it starts with the line: “So many times disappointed.” That’s the first line I heard from the first song I heard this morning. Got me thinking. Yankees disappointed me just a couple of weeks ago. Sports is a real source of constant disappointment for a lot of people across this land. I’ve hit disappointing golf shots… …have had disappointing meals and days of work. Disappointment is a price we pay to live, and there are ways over all sorts of things. I listened to classic rock - an old WHO record and then straight to the Stones. Nothing like the English invasion to calm things down. Thank God for Mick and Keith and Pete and Roger. About halfway through the day I was engrossed in work… ...

I’m a 60-year old white male. I’ve gone to work every day since I was about 15 years old. I should be able to finish my working days, basically unchanged. I imagine that I will be retired before the next 4 years are over, but I’m concerned about social security being there for me. There have been a lot of people hankering to wipe out SS. I fear for women. There are women dying - now - as they bleed out in waiting rooms because doctors are worried about being arrested for giving treatment. There will be a national ban on abortion. I’ve been thinking of a lot of men the Latino men I’ve met on construction sites. They’re likely to face a battle - even though I’ve known them for about a decade. They worked every day, paid taxes… …now they’re looked at as crazed murderers who will slit your throat in your kitchen. The FDA, the Department of Education, NATO, Ukraine, OSHA… …are all facing the wrath of lunacy. As a white male, nearing retirement age… …probably won’t touch my world much. But -...

 

I honestly don’t believe it. The criminal convictions. The blatant disregard for the constitution. The anger and rage. The stupidity. None of it mattered. A rich, white man beat a black woman. And the rich will get richer as nonsensical wealthy men like Elon Musk and Robert Kennedy Jr., and the guy with the wig and the makeup golfs and rages and sleeps and makes life miserable with his dark, dangerous rants. Covid didn’t matter. Storming the Capitol had no bearing. He mimicked a sex act on a microphone! Women are dying because they aren’t being treated for a simple miscarriage. It is dark as I write this and wake up to the news. I honestly wonder if the sun is going to even bother to come up. The shining light on the hill? It’s shuttered and boarded. Not sure we can survive 4 years of this. Seriously.

I didn’t want to watch the returns. Most of what I was hearing, all day on Tuesday was that the winner wouldn’t likely be known by bedtime on Tuesday anyway. And I simply couldn’t fathom that we are even doing this. I’m not egotistical enough to believe that someone can have an opinion that is vastly different than mine. I’m sure that there is plenty I don’t see, but the official credo of this great land is that: “All men are created equal.” Yet here we are in 2024 and that isn’t remotely true for some factions of the population. Such a stupid moment in time. We appear driven by greed, ruled by division and fear, and in the middle of the hugest divide since the civil war. So, instead of watching the returns, I went to reruns of ‘Two And A Half Men’ and ‘Everybody Loves Raymond.’ The more I thought about states going red, the less I wanted anything to do with any of it. So, here we are at 9:22 p.m., New York was just called for Harris… …there will be a long night ahead for a whole lot o...

I most likely won’t watch the returns come in tonight, and that is kind of sad. I have a very clear memory of watching the Carter-Ford election news come in, with Dad. I was just 12 years old, and Mom was concerned that I was up late, but Dad said:  “This is educational.” I have always recalled Carter saying: “I don’t intend to lose.” And I was pretty excited when he was declared the winner. Ford was a gracious loser.  I remember thinking how cool the entire process was, and my appreciation of Jimmy Carter has never waned. He has been an exemplary American. Tonight, the process won’t be what it was less than 50 years ago. One of the candidates is going to declare himself the victor before the polls even close, and then he’s going to try to sue everyone even though he doesn’t have anything to base it on. The media is treating it all like a tough decision that is too close to call, but even the most balanced of reporters (on the legitimate networks) can barely pretend that it ha...

The commercials are endless. Of course it’s been a consistent wave of garbage as the candidates try and make their case for the office of President. There is talk of gloom and doom - particularly from one side - but at the end of the day… …the changes in the country will be immense - depending on who gets the chair. You know where I stand - I know where plenty of others stand - we all get one vote. So use it. Stevie Nicks was interviewed last week and she spoke of great regret because she did not vote until she was 70 years old! I have friends who don’t vote, and there are plenty of youngsters who think their vote doesn’t matter. “I’m in New York- Harris is going to win that anyway.” Probably, but it’s still about your vote being counted, one way or another. I can’t wait for it to end. The last 4 years has been more peaceful than the previous 4 and I’m hoping that someday we won’t have the endless garbage of the political media game. There also is a true fear that the validity of the e...

Writing and releasing a book is always a crazy endeavor. “Are You An Idiot?” was written with a singular goal - make people laugh. I’m 17 published books in and I have to confess to something: I never truly know if it will hit the mark. That’s the thing about doing something creative. There’s a confidence in your ability to tell a story, but every single time there’s been a nagging sense of doom. “Will they like it?” This time, the question was: “Will they laugh?” And I don’t need to have my ego stroked. Once the book is released I can only hope. When I get a message from someone who enjoyed the story, it makes me smile. There’s relief and there’s the thought: “They read it and didn’t want it to end.” I can’t imagine not reading. When I find a book that I love reading there are days where I think: “I can’t wait to go to bed so I can get back to that book!” The fact that I, as a writer, can give a reader that feeling is honestly my favorite part about being an author. I was really young...

LeBron James put out an endorsement for Kamala Harris and he started it with a great question: “What are we even doing here?” He’s absolutely right. It’s a choice between hope and rage. Anger and inclusion. Love or hate. The other day, one of the candidates rode around in a garbage truck… …just spreading more nastiness. A brilliant friend of mine summed that up perfectly: “He got in the wrong end of the truck.” I can dream about a day - and I hope it’s in the next week or so - when I don’t have to see, hear, or think about him. He’s brought absolutely nothing other than rage, division, hate and idiocy to the national discussion. James is absolutely correct… …what are we even doing here? There’s simply no choice… …unless you are all for hate and rage… …if you are… …it’s not about either candidate… …it’s how you choose to live your life. Looking forward to that garbage truck driving away with its huge orange load.

The 2024 Yankees team was a fun team to watch. Judge and Soto and Stanton. Cole and Rodon and Gil. They had a good mix of youngsters and veterans. When they were playing well they were the best team in the sport, but when they went sideways, they were frustrating. They did all of the above things in the World Series and in the end, bad base running and poor defense did them in. There was a lot made out of Judge having a hard time hitting, but he came around, reaching base 7 times in the last two games. Yet, I’ve never seen him drop a fly ball. Aaron Boone is a good guy - he’s always pleasant in interviews and has his players backs - almost to a fault.  I’ve defended him for years. He’s also fairly adept at grabbing defeat from the jaws of victory. He made some weird decisions with the bullpen. The Yankees have been very good for the last 32 years - have not had a losing record - even once. That’s pretty much the entire span of my adult life. They have won 7 titles since I started r...