Stop!
Stop asking me questions on the gas pump screen!
I don’t want a car wash. I don’t want to sign up for your bonus card. I don’t want to come in and let you know how Hector is doing.
I want gas!
Stop.
Stop sending me an email request after I come to your establishment so I can acknowledge how great your service is.
You go to CVS for toothpaste and not only do you get a 20’ long receipt, you can also fill out a survey to rate how clean the freaking store was.
I don’t have time.
Stop.
Stop playing the “I stink horrifically ads on television.”
There’s one where a woman comes on and is in my face about how horrible her crotch and butt stench is as the day goes along.
She’s the one who uses the word “crotch”.
Horrible. I was eating lunch in front of the television the other day and there she was…
…Stinking up the joint.
This is an oldie but a good one.
Stop coming by the table, just after the food is served to ask us how “our first bites are tasting.”
I’m chewing here!
If there was a problem, after you put the food down, we’d search you out.
It’s like they’re coming by to make certain that you’ve bitten into the saliva they hid in your sandwich.
Stop raining on Sunday morning!
Had a tee time today.
Torrential downpours coming.
Stop!
I have so little.
5 good hours between 8 & 1 on a Sunday is all I ask.
Just
Freaking
Stop.
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