Texas Tea

Just filled up at the pumps - $3.40 a gallon. Hard to say how we've all adjusted to such prices, but what can we do? Run the engine with urine? Take the horse to work?

Our undistinguished leader once explained that we as Americans were addicted to oil. It was a bold statement that was issued without the usual stammering, or mis-pronunciation usually mustered during a stump speech. They were words meant to spur us on - to what exactly? Researching our own alternatives to this mess? Trying to run the mower with Ginger Ale?

I don't drive a Hummer. I try my best to conserve energy, but I've noticed that when I allow the needle on the tank to get below E, the vehicle starts gasping and eventually quits. Yet, I also noticed that we attacked - as Chris Rock put it - an oil-producing nation - and still the prices go up. I've also noticed that I am uneducated in the ways of the wealthy and certainly don't understand the subtle nuances that are driving the costs skyward, but when the news proclaims that the oil companies are making record profits, it's hard not to do the math - it's at our expense, isn't it?

Yet, our leadership has also proclaimed that the record profits by the oil companies is a testament to the free enterprise system and that they can't control prices to accomodate demand - no, we must, as citizens, reduce our demand for oil. It's our fault. I feel like a true addict in this oil war, but the basic question still begs for an answer. How do I weane myself off of it? What is my Nicorette to this horrific addiction. (Which also makes me wonder why quit smoking alternatives are so damn expensive. You can make a warehouse full of Bubble gum for six bucks, but non-smoking gum costs a buck a piece - and it isn't even a full stick!).

It seems to me that we need to offer some solutions, and cut out the middle man. I haven't heard much about research being done with the record profits that will lessen our dependancy on oil. I envision the day when I call my boss and tell him I can't make it to work because my wife forgot to plug in the car, but I doubt I will ever see such a day. No, I am just going to have to suck it up, and tough it out, and understand that it embarrasses me to glance at the pump when I'm filling up the car - it's so hard to put in 40 bucks and understand that I didn't even bring the needle up to 3/4's full.

Yet, we as honest, hard-working citizens should just practice saying it together - "My oil dependancy is my fault. Iam an addict and I'm ashamed of my addiction."

Perhaps we can set-up a ten-step program to break this addicition. Maybe the oil companies could sponser such a rehab program - it sure would give them something to do with their extra cash.

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