Thoughts of a Common Man

Golfed on Sunday with a couple of gentlemen who were well into their 7th decade. We just met the guys and so we told a few stories in an effort to get to know one another. The one guy told us about playing all the famous courses in Scotland - he received the gift from his wife so he could celebrate his 60th birthday. Reminded me that I have just three weeks left in my 50’s. Now, all of my classmates have reached the nice, round number but I was one of the late born kids. Sixty!!! Seems insane to me. When we golf I always head into the woods and search for golf balls. I don’t need golf balls, and the ones I find I either give away or save for Sam in a huge box in our storage room… …he needs golf balls. But I search for them, through the woods, up and down little embankments, and under tree because when I’m looking for them I still feel like a kid. I usually go home with dirt all over me and cuts in my arms and legs. I don’t take for granted that I move pretty well across job sites and u...

I certainly can’t listen to the Republican candidate for president speak, but I can read the recap of his rallies. 1). Migrants are stealing the black jobs. What does that mean? What’s a black job? It’s so disgraceful.  2). Immigrants are running rampant with AK-47’s. First, how is this Kamala Harris’ fault?  She has been the vice-president.  Secondly, wasn’t there supposed to be a big, beautiful wall? You know who failed as far as fixing the immigration problem? Yeah - the guy who promised to fix it and have Mexico pay for it. 3). Kamala is stupid. This has been said at nearly every rally for a month now.  That sounds like something running for 4th grade president might say about his opponent, and it’s certainly not even remotely true. Harris was a prosecutor in California, not a game show host. Stupid is bankrupting a casino. 4). Windmills cause cancer. I don’t even know where someone might come up with that. 5). Hannibal Lector is not a friend of his. He brings th...

Years ago, I was asked to speak in Vegas by a work colleague, Jon, who was convinced that I would entertain a crowd of safety professionals. We were two different kinds of safety professionals - he taught classes at a major university, and I did a bit of standup as I taught the classes. When we met, my boss called me into his office and said, “Don’t bust this guy’s balls. He’s an intellectual. You have to pull it back a little.” I never did and it didn’t take long to bring, Jon, stuffy intellectual to the dark side. We became fast friends and I definitely busted his balls. Jon retired a few years back, but every few months, we texted just to catch up a little bit. This week, he texted me. “Hey buddy, I don’t even know how to tell you this. My wife had a fatal heart attack. 42 years. I’m adrift.” What does one say - in a text - to such a message? “Oh Good Lord,” was my immediate response. “I’m so sorry.” There wasn’t much more to add to that additional text. I needed to give him the spa...

I don’t watch every Yankees game anymore, but I certainly know the score of the game as they’re playing.  I watched last night as Stanton homered and cleared the bases with a double as they blasted the hapless Orioles and won the division. For good measure, Judge hit his 58th homer. In the top of the 8th the Orioles had two on with two out. Down 9-0. Kathy made a move to change the channel. “I think they’re going to be all right,” she said. I made her keep it there until Holmes got the 3rd out. It’s been 11 years since Mariano retired. Ten years since Jeter left. These aren’t my Dad’s Yankees anymore… .:.but he would’ve been happy this morning. They belong at the top of the sport. Now let’s go get #28.

I had a training session that took me through the center of Wales. It’s a tiny little village but as like every other place in America there is a Dollar General. I swung in for a few things for Ollie and the Camp Clifford campers - I had a solid half hour before my meeting, which was just five minutes away. I was in and out of the store quickly, but unbeknownst to me an elderly woman had a medical emergency on the sidewalk leading to the store. I spotted her, being loaded onto a stretcher. She was alert, which seemed like good news. She also had about 4 paramedics around her - they arrived in two vans that were strategically pulled close to the door… …blocking 5 cars - including mine. I got out of the way, tossed my bag into the car and watched the paramedics go to work. A few minutes later, a man about my age, stepped out the door. “Oh what the f*ck?” The man yelled. He pointed at his blocked in vehicle, and then looked in my direction. “Why did they block us all in?” He screamed. I w...

As I rapidly approach 60 years here, I have figured out my aches and pains. The left hip will always hurt. My back needs ice after a work week or a round of golf. My feet are so nervy that sometimes it feels I’m wearing electric socks. Used to it. You can get used to anything and sooner or later it’s just your life. It’s the days when you go to bed intact and wake up in the morning thinking: “What the hell is this?” Pain in the bicep 💪 - right arm - this morning. I tried to think about where I might have hurt it the day before. Nothing! Climbing a ladder? Throwing for the Big O? No idea… …I worked it a little bit as the day went along. It’ll probably go away… …replaced by something else. Ain’t gonna’ get any better!

Monday was an odd day because for the first time in a couple of weeks there wasn’t bright sunshine. And it was Monday. And the Bills had a night home game… …which meant that people would be heading for the gate early. Messes up my routine because no one is truly thinking about work. I battled through. Then did my level best to avoid the NFL even though their circus was a mile and a half from my house. I was watching Rizzoli & Isles when the Bills went up by two touchdowns. I heard the fireworks from the game and my neighbor praying to Josh Allen. Now, I’m the old dude shouting at the clouds, but listen to Jeff Perlman talk about the end of Walter Payton’s life. The NFL has a Walter Payton Man of the Year award for him because he died early. Of cancer. Yet, when Payton got the cancer, as a young man, he was HAPPY he had a death sentence because he hated living in the pain. I can’t watch it. But Go Bills! I can’t escape it either, I guess.

Springsteen is celebrating his 75th birthday today and that makes me a little sad. Even though I’m approaching 60… …75 seems old! And since I became aware of Bruce’s work when I was just 10 years old… …well, it’s been a hell of a ride! Everyone knows the Boss’s story by now. He was born into a less-than-working class family. His mother was of Italian descent and brought sunshine and his Dad was a big Irish guy who was prone to bouts of severe depression. Bruce got a lot from each of his parents, and it worked because he had something to say, and he knew how to entertain. Guy worked his ass off, and studied his craft and made a lot of money and built a global following. I argue, with anyone who’ll listen that he’s one of the greatest American writer of this century, and that was what initially inspired me. Then I saw them perform and I still recall the morning after that first show back in 1984. My life had changed. Every year, Apple Music does a tally of the music that I’ve listened to...

All kinds of stories breaking about foolish behavior. There’s the Olivia Nuzzi story - she’s a journalist who allegedly sent nudes and had an affair with RFK Jr. There’s Sean ‘Diddy’ Combs who is in a world of hurt and on suicide watch for his alleged lifetime of debauchery.  There’s Matt Gaetz - a true creepy looking dude - who is also a senator from the state of Florida (that’s a story starter there) who was said to have had sex with a 17-year-old. Finally, there’s Mark Robinson a Lieutenant Governor from North Carolina who called himself a Nazi, and waxed poetically about how cool it might be to own a few slaves. He is accused of an extra-marital affair and all kinds of depraved behavior, including perhaps, a dalliance with a sister-in-law. Nuts! Here’s what I’ve learned as an adult male in a long marriage with kids watching me. Behave! Your secrets are going to be found out. Your perverse behavior will be unearthed. And, while we’re at it - I might be an old man here - but send...

When Ohtani came over from Japan it became clear that he didn’t want anything to do with New York. He signed with the Angels and played with Trout for five years. We didn’t see either of them in the playoffs, and he hit free agency. Again, the Yankees didn’t get a sniff, and damn did he get a big contract. $700 million for 10 years, and since he was recovering from a shoulder injury - that was a whole lot of money for season 1 for just a DH. He did all right. More than 50 homers and more than 50 stolen bases. They’ve been playing baseball a long time… …no one has ever done that. His game on Thursday night was beyond ridiculous. He went 6 for 6 with 3 homers, 2 stolen bases and 10 RBI… …that was the sort of game that would get my buddy, Jeff Renaldo the Polly-O string cheese player of the game in our slow-pitch softball game. Ridiculous. The last homer came off a middle-infielder who was doing mop-up duty in a game that ended 20-4. He’s going to be a problem when the Yankees sweep the D...

I don’t participate in any football fantasy leagues. That right there seems to be enough to set me firmly in the minority. I simply don’t know enough about the players anymore. If someone held a gun to my head I’d have a hard time giving you three wide receivers on the Bills. Which is kind of odd to me because I could probably give you the starters on the 70’s and 80’s and 90’s teams. Now, my boys are all over it! Sam has at least four teams and I believe Jake has two. They mentioned the Thursday game to me and I had to ask who was playing. They then went into long dissertations about who they had on their teams. What I do find interesting is the punishments that are handed out for the person who finishes last in their league. “There was a league where the last place finisher had to get a tattoo of Justin Bieber,” Sam mentioned. “Good Lord,” I said. “There are eating ones too,” Jake mentioned. “I knew a guy who had to eat fifty pancakes. He stayed in the diner until he got it done. Too...

The Oakland A’s are playing their final games in Oakland next week. Fittingly, they close out their team history by playing the Yankees, and I’m sure that was by design so that the place would be packed on the final weekend. I went to at least a dozen games at the Oakland Stadium back in the 1980’s, and the only baseball cap I ever wore that didn’t have an NY on it was an A’s cap. They were an easy team to like when I was living out there, and even before that - in the 70’s - they were the best team in the sport. The fans were always passionate, but man, things went wrong there. The city and the team could not get it together. The owner, despite getting plenty of cash from revenue sharing just kept dealing his best players. I listened to the A’s current manager speak about the move - the team will play in Sacramento next year and Vegas when a new stadium is built - leaving Oakland behind. The A’s manager was choked up… …and then I started thinking about my old trips to the place. I saw...

I have to chime in, I guess. Reluctantly. The caravans and the big, bad immigrants are coming for your jobs, your pets, and your way of life. And only he can stop it! So, let’s check out the facts: 1). Which President deported the least amount of illegal immigrants? Biden? Obama? 👎  The correct answer is the one in the middle of those two. Still don’t know the answer? He’s orange. 2). Back in 2016 we heard that Mexico was sending their rapists so he was going to build a huge wall that would keep them out and Mexico was going to pay for it. Here’s what didn’t happen: 1). There’s no big wall. 2). Mexico didn’t pay. 3). It’s still an issue. 3). The Springfield, Ohio pet story was fabricated. What has happened since: Bomb threats. Legal Haiti immigrants having to keep their children home from school. The media has descended on the town looking for stories of brown people chasing geese. Violence is just around the corner. And the big, bad truth of it all: A bi-partisan bill was killed ...

I tried to take the ‘I’m not sick approach’ to being sick. Golfed on Friday afternoon and felt all right while I played and horrible afterwords. Knew I had Saturday to rest, but I didn’t rest all that much - still believing that moving around and denying it was the best move. I cleaned up around here. Grabbed some supplies for the Camp and played with O. Woke Sunday believing that I’d turned the corner and I played another round on Sunday morning and played good. “I’m done being sick,” I announced. “No you aren’t,” Kathy said. “I see it in your face.” “All done!” Mind over matter is horseshit. I was up and out early yesterday but by noon I knew it was a losing battle. Pushed through and made it all the way to Angie Harmon on Rizzoli at the five o’clock showing. “I can order you something for dinner,” Kathy said. “Nah. I’m good.” “Still not sick, huh?” “Nope!” “Idiot.”

Mid-way through the day there was a post: “I HATE TAYLOR SWIFT!!!” That was not a post from a teenage girl, rather it was from the pig running for president. It’s not funny. In fact, it’s dangerous because there’s a bushel of deplorables out there willing to take his violence to the streets. An hour later we hear that there was another attempt on his life. Add that to the last one and there seems to have been zero credible attempts on his life. It’s hard to believe anything that comes out of that campaign following the pet-eating story of last week. “If we have to make up stories than that’s what we’ll do,” his turd of a running partner said. He said THAT yesterday! But here we are… …and here I am… …talking about the turd in the punch bowl again. The guy who says that this country is a shit hole every time he gets a microphone in front of him and claims that he’s the only one who can save us. Every. Damn. Day. He was golfing at the time. Told that dope Hannity that he was even par and ...

I have some Beatles music on my devices and they pop up routinely as songs do. I might have to start skipping them. I’ve been singing “Bang, bang Maxwell Silver Hammer” for the last three days. A few years back there was a movie about a world without The Beatles - with the exception of one guy who had all the songs in his head. As he began releasing them, one after another, in the modern world, he became a huge star. Was a pretty good movie that reminded us that, damn - they were prolific writers! They weren’t together all that long. Broke up when I was five years old.. …but man, their songs stick in one’s head. Of course, in these modern times we can’t have nice things - there are people who claim that they were lousy musicians or that their simple lyrics would be passed off as garbage, but when something strikes that largely… …there is some talent there. Look at Taylor Swift - she just got a half a million people signed up to vote with a single statement. She can’t stop selling ticke...

This warm stretch of weather and the kickoff of the Bills season has led to a raucous revival here at Camp Clifford. Sam and Jake attended the Bills opener and have been pleased with the results of the first two games (even though everyone is SO CONCERNED about Tua and his concussions - that’s another story). But I have also taken advantage with a number of rounds of golf. After the back-to-back rounds I was struggling to get up the ladders… …but it’s good to be tired from moving. My beautiful wife, you ask? She caught a cold from Sam… …and she really ran with it! She was down and out for a full week. At one point she asked me: “How does Sam get sick, hand it to me, and you walk around perfectly healthy?” “I’m a medical marvel,” I said…. …and then I woke up on Thursday. “Uh-oh,” I told Miller the cat. As head camp counselor, I can’t be down and out. Too many people depending on me to do too many things. I sloughed through the day and made it to Thursday evening. The football game start...

The nation is up in arms over the story about immigrants from Haiti invading an Ohio city and plunking geese and dogs and cats from the streets and eating them. It’s a story that’s being spread by the same party that brought you: 1). Kids are identifying as cats so they put litter boxes in classrooms. 2). Hilary Clinton is running a sex pedophile ring out of the basement of a New York pizza parlor. 3). Windmills cause cancer. 4). They’re performing sex change operations on kids who head off to school - your son is getting on the bus - 3 days later, your daughter is returning home. 5). Doctors and mothers are deciding - after a baby is born - if they are going to let the kid live. Now, all the above stories have been debunked, but that simply hasn’t mattered to a pretty healthy chunk of the population. When the old, orange dude screamed: “They’re eating your dogs, they’re eating your cats, they’re eating your pets,” it gave credence to a truly insane meme. Think of that… …running for th...

My boys don’t pay a whole lot of attention to politics, but more than a couple of times they’ve mentioned: “What’s wrong with your generation? How does anyone take that dope seriously?” So I wasn’t totally surprised when Jake texted me on Wednesday morning: “She mopped the floor with that moron. That should do it, right?” “You’d think so,” I answered, “but he still has a following.” Jake had a one-word response: “How?” Of course, I didn’t have an answer to that question, and I listened to the clips. He did seem insane. He couldn’t formulate a response that wasn’t just a whining monologue about how unfair everyone is to him. The fact that he brought up the issue of immigrants stealing and eating cats and dogs was embarrassing. Harris knew exactly how to bait him. She hit him about his crowd size. She chided him about his bankruptcies, and demolished him by telling him that he had been fired by 81 million people. There are two months left… …if he keeps getting his ass handed to him… …his...

I can’t watch it. I know that as a concerned citizen I’m supposed to pretend that I am going to listen to the answers of the two candidates and decide who should lead our country for the next 4 years. I can’t do it. There’s no reason to anyway… …because listening to someone answer questions with blatant lies and disdain for portions of the country who are different is not a productive use of my time. This shouldn’t be billed as an election between two viable candidates, and although the news media is selling it like a prize fight… …one of the participants has been convicted of 34 felonies and he tried to overthrow the government, and was close to getting his vice-president strung up. So, debate or don’t debate… …I don’t care because I won’t buy into any of it. The man should not be allowed to run. Period. And the news continues to grow more dire. Millions of millions of dollars were paid directly to him, from foreign nations, as he sat in the chair the last time. And the story just fad...

Billy Joel wrote a great verse in one of his songs: “This is the time to remember but it will not last forever. These are the days we’ll hold onto because we won’t although we’ll want to. This is the time, but times are going to change.” That song popped into my head as I drove past Darien Lakes 6 Flags Theme Park. I recall times in high school when my buddy Jeff and I took our dates up there. We spent a fortune all for a cuddle and a peck on the cheek. Great times! But the true Darien Lake days was when the kids were young. A whole bunch of us headed up to the park - camping in their trailers. The men volunteered to hang back at the campsite and cook while the women hustled the kids up to the park. Sounds like we got the short end of the stick, but hell no! We drank a lot of beer as we prepared the chicken or ribs. Then we would all venture up to the park to take the kids on the big rides… …sling shot… …Superman roller coaster. It was a blast. And as I thought of Billy’s lyrics my hea...

  That’s the ear of the man that was supposedly blown off by an AR-15 just three weeks ago. Let’s review what we know about the so-called shooting at the political rally. An interview with the family of the man who died? A breakdown of the suspect…who was shot?  His family? Where did he get the gun? Why did he attempt to take the life of the leader of the party that he supposedly supported? Are there records of the visit to the hospital to bandage that fully healed ear? Come on, now… …there is nothing! A non-story. My number one question was about why the secret service allowed their mark to stand up, position himself in front of the flag, pick his head up and pump his fist yelling, “fight, fight, fight!”… …all before anyone knew if the threat was over. Now, I sound like a crackpot conspiracy theorist, right? Yet, he’s a quick healer? His ear was supposedly hit by a bullet from a powerful weapon. “There was a lot of blood!” I’m thinking that we will learn the truth of the matt...

Back to back rounds of golf. Friday was at a tough links course - which meant narrow fairways and thick grass that is impossible to hit out of because whoever designed the course was a real dink. Hitting straight is my usual super power but man, I was fired up to play with my buddies and I began it all by yanking the ball left - tried to slow down - ended up completely missing the ball off the tee, or topping it, or ugh!!! Golf! The weather and the company was mostly outstanding - my cart partner doesn’t play much and spent a lot of the first 13 holes drinking beer, talking in the backswing, and complaining that “Golf sucks.” I was so disappointed in the round. Played poorly. Golf is a game that is reliant on being mentally strong.  I was a mental midget for all four hours! But I kept looking around at the beauty that surrounded me. Trees, huge hills, blue skies, and so much bright sun shine. We headed out to an Italian restaurant for dinner. We sat down at 7:45 and didn’t leave th...

“Are You An Idiot?” is a book about me.  I realize that it is a bit of a vanity project and displays a bit of narcissism, but let me explain: 1). I enjoy writing in the fashion of some of the others that I’ve enjoyed through the years. I mentioned a couple of weeks back that my buddy Al and I enjoyed the humor books written by Atlanta sportswriter Lewis Grizzard. Those books always took aim at one person - Lewis Grizzard - and they were quick, funny stories. “Are You An Idiot?” was written in that style. 2). My son Sam once mentioned to me that:  “We aren’t ever going to have to wonder what you were thinking because you wrote everything down.” These are some of the stories that I’ve been telling for years…just humorous anecdotes about my days. In the back of my mind, I’m thinking of my legacy. It’s strange how one thinks when there’s less days in front of the horse compared to what is in back of the cart. It’s for my boys and their kids. 3). I have a bunch of books in the can....

Heading off to two days of golf with my Syracuse buddies, and I had to make an adjustment to the room arrangements. It’s been said that I snore. Normally we go two to a room - based on how the event started about 30 years ago. One year I was woken by my buddy, Rob, who was throwing wet wash rags at me. “You’re snoring!” The next year, my buddy, Tony, woke me at 4 in the morning as he was showering. “What the hell are you doing?” I asked. “I’m going to sleep in the lobby,” he said. “It’s like sleeping with a bear.” So, my buddy Tom called: “I lost,” he said. “You’re my roommate.” “That’s not happening,” I said. “I’m getting my own room.” “But we’re supposed to split the cost,” he said. “Good Lord,” I said. “You have more money than God. You can take the hit.” After I booked the room, I mentioned to Kathy that I wasn’t sharing a room. “You don’t even want to share a room with me,” she said. “I can’t believe the rest of them are sharing rooms.” And it is a little odd, I guess, but that’s ...

Currently wearing the Yankees windbreaker (they better get their shit together) because I’m hesitant to break out the hoodie that I’ll be wearing from when I put it on until freaking May! That hoodie starts out as my primary over the shirt garment in September and then I wear it underneath my winter coat. Then after months the winter coat comes off and I wear the hoodie the rest of the way. Sucks. “I think we’re gonna’ have an old-fashioned winter this year,” one guy said. “Snow on the ground from November thru March.” I wanted to slap him. We haven’t had many of those in recent years. We usually have wild temperature swings with one or two major snow events now. Really major. Like 75 inches in 48 hours. I kind of prefer those types of winters. But either way… …I’m looking for where I put that hoodie. Reluctantly!

For years, my brother Jeff ran a fantasy baseball team that he named ‘Cashman’. My sons, Matt and Sam took over as managers and soon had the team in last place. I recruited help, getting Jeff’s son, Johnny, in the mix, but it didn’t help.  They finished last again. This year before the year started, I sent them the team photo - which is Jeff - and said: “It costs me $150 a year to keep this team on the field. Are you going to finish last again?” Of course, Johnny can trash talk with the same enthusiasm that Jeff had. “We’re coming home with the chip!” I laughed. Well, I checked the standings this morning…. …they’re a half a week away from battling for the ‘chip’. They drafted a minor leaguer - Paul Skenes - with the last pick in the draft - and he just might win it for them. My season ended when the playoffs began as I finished just short. So. How much crap do you think they’re talking??? And of course, there is a hefty prize for winning it all. “You know the league fee comes out o...

It was a good weekend. I stayed away from the political news all the way to Monday night. Then I watched an interview where one candidate stated that: “Kids are going to school and then a few days later they’re returning home after the school gives them surgery to change their gender.” The interviewer didn’t ask a follow up question and the candidate then said: “We have to stop that from happening.” We don’t have to… …because that isn’t happening! One of the other things that has been said: “Women are having babies and then they’re being asked by the doctors if they want to keep it. They’re having abortions after the baby is born.” That is called: Murder. There isn’t a doctor in the world that would perform an after-birth abortion. Because he would be arrested!!! And, of course, that particular lie is repeated at every single rally. No wonder people are pissed off! I would certainly vote against any party that took children out of school and performed gender surgery, or murdered new bo...

It’s crazy how much an extra day off can invigorate you. It’s Sunday night, the house is clean, the dog is tired and I have another tee time set for the morning. I worked on the new book a little - it will be officially released on September 23rd - and I worked on the one after that. We hung out a bit and the talk of my eventual retirement was a topic. I mentioned the day I have picked out and Kathy immediately said: “NO!” “What’re you talking about? That will be plenty,” I said. She laughed. “I watch you. You don’t stop moving. You won’t last two weeks.” Yet, I told her all about the plans I’ve made to not go stir crazy. “I don’t need to climb ladders well into my 60’s to be fulfilled.” “You don’t need to, but you want to!” And of course, that’s not always true. “Thing is, I’m closer than you think. I don’t need yo rush out of bed every day for the rest of my life.” She laughed. “Okay, I bet you that you can’t sit still for 40 minutes,” she said, “I can do that,” We had a show on....

The hockey world is mourning the passing of star player Johnny Gaudreau who was riding a bike in New Jersey - alongside his brother - just hours before his sister’s wedding. They were run down by a drunk driver. A 43-year old man who couldn’t order a freaking Uber. And it’s not just the death of a sports star - the two men were husbands and fathers and sons. Cut down in the prime of their lives for no reason other than someone else felt like getting pissed up and driving a car. You know what’s crazy? We actually evolved on this issue. When we were young the roads were filled with drunken drivers - it’s insane but a lot of people of a certain age have looked out the window the next morning, wondering how they got their car home. My boys were absolutely devastated by the Gaudreau tragedy. They know enough to Uber when they head out, or call for a ride. Kathy has driven the boys around a lot through the years. When such news breaks, it reminds all of us how fragile life can be. May they r...