Thoughts of a Common Man

I laughed. Guilty on all 34 counts and he stands up and calls himself a very innocent man. He calls the trial a rigged disgrace. I have a few questions. How does a convicted felon run for president when you aren’t even allowed to vote? The media I was watching immediately started to frame it that it will still be a close election because while the orange thing is a convicted felon, Joe is old. That’s an equal sin, right? It’s obvious that the only successful move he ever made was to sell red hats to cult members. It was also quickly said that being found guilty on 34 felony counts wouldn’t necessarily result in jail time… …which is insane. There are men in jail for decades for pot violations. Others went away for stealing food from a grocery store. Regardless… …its a good day for the rule of law. Break the law… …be held to account. Nothing rigged about any of it.

Robert DeNiro has stepped up and just destroyed the orange traitor saying that he’s an ‘absolute monster’. Of course, DeNiro is - and has become an enemy of MAGA. Springsteen has also been outspoken in interviews (although people think he speaks out at his shows and I’ve never heard such a thing at the 34 shows I’ve seen). In the buildup to the election I feel that anyone with a voice and a conscience should say something about how highly unqualified that the Republican candidate is. After his criminal case went to the jury he stood out in front of the courthouse and cried about how unfair it was because the prosecution didn’t call any witnesses that he liked. “Those witnesses should’ve been called, but they weren’t. It’s not fair!” How dumb does he think the general public is? We’ve all watched enough court television to know that the prosecution doesn’t have to call the witnesses that the criminal wants! You know who should have called witnesses that might have helped him? Yeah. His ...

MLB umpire Angel Hernandez retired suddenly yesterday. I received about 7 texts congratulating me because like all baseball fans, I was not a fan of how Hernandez called a baseball game. He was incompetent, at best, and intentionally confrontational at his worst. When the umpires were announced as the game started I would scream if Hernandez was behind the plate, or at first base, or at second base or at third base. He was equally bad… …no matter where he umped. Angel behind home plate was an absolute adventure and if you have a chance to watch the worst of his calls you’ll see him throwing out Bryce Harper or Kyle Schwarber on two of the most horrendous of calls. That’s the thing about Angel… …not only was he often wrong… …he behaved as if he were the meanest man who ever stepped on a baseball field (except for maybe Ty Cobb). Yet, a funny thing happened as I celebrated Angel being sent out to pasture… …I started feeling sorry for him! All of social media was celebrating! I imagined h...

Most of life is a grind. When there’s a huge event like a wedding it all seems to slow down for a little while, right? Eventually we need to return to the grind. No matter how exciting it was. So, what happened in the real world? Memorial Day is always a great day to recall the sacrifices made so that we remain free, but there’s been so much unrest and it’s hard to comprehend where we are as a country. Those thoughts can wait. Bill Walton passed away yesterday. He was a terrific basketball player back in the 70’s and was a funny, crazy commentator. I was all over that Portland Trailblazers team that won the championship in 1977. As a 12-year old I used to play the games of that championship series - Blazers over the Sixers. My boys only remember Walton as the crazy announcer. I told them all about how great a player he was. He was a hippie, a red head and one of the greatest big men of all-time - I have his autograph kicking around here somewhere. We’ve been watching a lot of the NBA p...

The dance floor was full, and I turned to my brother and remarked: “All these kids listen to is hip-hop, but have you noticed that all the songs they’re playing and singing along with are rock and roll?” Goo-Goo Dolls, Bruce, Journey, AC/DC, Rod Stewart. “Great music will always have a place,” John said. The photos are being passed around - my nephew John has to be in about 700 photos - I shared this one because it’s the one I could find where he wasn’t making a funny face. (That was one of his Dad’s favorite pastimes). Then there are all the conversations shared. Kathy and I met when Matt was just a year old, and life could’ve been dramatic. I was walking into the venue when I spotted Matt’s Dad. We shook hands and he turned and said: “I was thinking. We did all right. Some thirty years and neither of us said a cross word about one another in front of Matt.” It was something I’d also been thinking about. “We should do a shot to that,” I said. “And you’re right. It just would’ve been a...

At the rehearsal on Thursday, Matt was adamant that he would most definitely NOT cry as he read his vows. Of course, his groomsmen were giving it to him pretty good, and I was fairly sure there wouldn’t be any tears. There was rain coming down, but it was more an inconvenience than anything else. They got to the vows right after having a moment of silence for all those we wished were also there. Matt did a good job talking about his love, and his voice cracked and then he stopped. He was crying! He yelled at himself, “Focus!”, which brought a big laugh…and he almost got through it before his voice cracked again. I was stunned. Not that he was so emotional, but that I was too!  I don’t cry!! I knew Kathy was weeping, but I didn’t turn to her because my wave of emotion was truly surprising me. Yet I was considering almost a full 30 years… …so many memories ricocheting through my mind at a rapid pace. Of course, life is all about such great moments, and I spent the rest of the evening...

There was a lot happening here at Camp Clifford just 24 hours before the wedding. When I pulled into the driveway after work, I was shocked to see Jake and Sam and my nephew, John playing catch. I was well aware that an innocent game of catch probably wasn’t all they were going to be up to. “You could mow the lawn,” I said. “We could,” they admitted. “We probably won’t.” Half an hour later they were getting ready to leave. “What’s going on?” I asked. “Going to get wings.” That eventually led to bowling, a trip to a bar, and finally, another game of catch. All good stuff unless you’re an uptight man who is used to routine. “I wish they’d just let me know what their plans are,” I said. “They don’t have plans,” Kathy said. That made me think of the night before my brother’s wedding. We were up all night, and a game of billiards turned into a game of pool hockey. Here were the rules: Two brothers stood on one side of the table and armed with 5 pool balls… …they threw the balls on the table...

 There was a moment when I turned to Kathy and asked, “Why am I here?” As a parent of the groom my entire participation in the rehearsal was to sit in my assigned seat. “Sit there and look pretty,” Kathy said. And we watched as they walked down the aisle - Jake and Sam are in the party so it was fun to see. Then the woman in charge mentioned: “We will say something about those who are not here, but played a part in your lives.” And that’s when I felt a twinge of great sadness. I thought about Kathy’s Mom first - she was so great to our children - she would’ve absolutely loved every second of Matt being married.  I thought of my parents too. Life, man, is cruel. “Maybe they will be here,” I said, as we moved away. And then we were off to the party and dinner. I got a flask! I’ve always liked the idea of a flask and I had one for a while there when I was in my 20’s, but I no longer drink. “Are you going to fill it with water?” Kathy asked. “No,” I said. “I’m gonna’ get something...

Started my day by watching an interview with a woman who suffered a miscarriage after attempting to get answers for a non-viable pregnancy. The woman went to the hospital - by ambulance - and laid there for 8 hours as the hospital figured out what to do. The pregnancy was no longer viable but the law said that she could not just have it ended: She left the hospital only to return again the next day. Another 11 hours with no treatment. She returned home and miscarried into the toilet. They arrested her. Charged her with mutilation of a corpse! The woman was brokenhearted, lost, confused, disgusted and annoyed…. …and arrested! Poor craziness. In her interview she expressed that the medical community was clueless about what to do to treat her. Now, I’m sure there are thousands of these stories across the land. This isn’t a woman who even wanted to terminate the pregnancy. It happened naturally. They arrested her. What are we doing?

“I could watch this show for 20 straight hours,” I said, as we watched the 4th episode of season 3 of ‘Hacks’. Jean Smart is absolutely perfect in the role as an older comedian and she is perfect with her comedy writer - who is also great in the show. There are a lot of good one-liners, of course, but it’s the relationships that work the best. Deborah Vance, the character, is everything that someone rich and famous might be: Self-absorbed. Rich and spoiled. Unaware of how she hurts others. Insecure and desperate to stay on top. So, I’m wondering if anyone else is watching the show - I haven’t seen a lot about it, but three seasons - it must be doing fine… …but Jean Smart deserves an award and I’m campaigning for her. The show also touches on some of the issues of the day, but a great show is meant to take you away from the garbage that is in the news. I mean how many times can you listen to a former President complain about how cold it is in his courtroom as he faces a criminal sentenc...

It’s been a little quieter than I thought, but Matt and his bride have handled all the wedding challenges and we’ve had little to say about it… …I think. At least I have been quiet about it. I went for my tux a couple of weeks back. “What is the venue?” The guy asked me. “I don’t know.” “Okay, what’s the date?” “End of May,” I said. The man laughed. “This is your kid’s wedding?” “Yeah.” “How about this, do you know his name?” I laughed. “Ah, there you are,” he said. “Your boys Jake & Sam have already been fitted. I have a comment here. They say that you’re paying for all of the rentals.” This time, I laughed. “Bastards.” Of course, I chipped in a little and Matt and Alicia were appreciative but I mentioned to him that his time was right now! “She’s great,” Matt said. “Yeah, remember that when you think about whether or not you can get away with strangling her and finding a country without extradition.” He laughed. “You’re talking about Mom!” He said. “I’m joking about Mom,” I corre...

We’ve been watching the NBA playoffs around here and believe it or not, I’m the one who has to be convinced to put it on the television. Kathy and the boys have a lot to talk about when it comes to the games and I have no idea when Kathy figured out that Doncic is a great player. We watched 3 straight games that were absolute blowouts and all three of the Camp Clifford campers were upset when the Joker lost the other night. “Doesn’t matter,” I said, “The Yankees won and that’s all that matters.” I go back to something Uncle George said in the year or so before he died: “The day is better when the Yankees win.” I find that to be true and it’s been that way all my life. I think about all the days of my life when I opened my eyes and considered: “Yankees play at 1:35 - Rodon is pitching.” Only the times and names have changed. Now, I don’t watch every game, but I certainly keep track of where they are in the game and who is coming to bat. I’m spoiled too. The Yankees have been pretty good...

We have 3 vacuums here. None of them are functional. We have 3 lawn mowers here. Only one starts and that’s because it’s brand new - I got tired of trying to start the other two. As for the vacuums. One never worked. The other went south about six months ago. The last one stopped sucking a couple of weeks ago. “It just needs a belt,” I was told. “I’ll take it in soon.” I’ve been married a long time. I know that ‘soon’ can be tomorrow or six months from now. My mind only works when there is no clutter and when all the things on my to-do-list are done. Vacuuming the downstairs where the dog and cat come in was high on my list. I wasn’t waiting on the belt…. …I headed to Target…walked straight to the vacuum aisle and picked up a box that held my new vacuum. I put the box into my truck and that’s when it hit me: “Someone has to put it together.” I was a little nervous, but truth be told, it couldn’t have been any easier. I clicked a couple of pieces into place, and quickly vacuumed. A few ...

She was always ready with a big smile whenever I visited the client. If we did a luncheon she always called to ask me what I wanted to eat. “I eat everything except mushrooms,” I said. “No fungus among us.” The owner of the company truly depended on her, often shifting me in her direction when something needed a fast answer. Turns out, she was robbing them blind! An elaborate scheme that was eventually found out, but resulted in some pretty good times for her as the company battled to stay afloat. “That’s about the fifth middle-aged woman I’ve heard about who was busted for stealing huge amounts of money,” one of the guys on the sites said. “There was a church treasurer in my town who stole a half a mil over time and gambled it all away.” “It’s just that I can’t picture this nice woman doing it,” I said. “She was always smiling.” “Cause she was happy!” He said. “Who knew she was rich for a little while there?” There will be jail time. Perhaps a decade. Woman is my age. Not the way to s...

Chiefs kicker, Harrison Butker made a speech at a Christian school where he spoke about women and what he believes their lives should be like. The comments were about how women who chase a career instead of being a wife and a mother are missing out. It’s the kind of statement that infuriates people because he was trying to talk down a bit to people who choose a different path. I never truly understand what a guy like this is trying to accomplish. Not every woman wants to stay home and serve a man, or raise children. Some women, believe it or not, find peace in living a life that is not centered around taking care of their field-goal kicking husband. Now, Butker got all choked up as he was talking about it, and good for him, he seems happy with his situation… …he could even go as far as saying… …this is what worked best for us. Where he went astray is in his proclamation that women have been lied to and are dead-ass wrong if they live a life that doesn’t mirror his. I’ve learned one thi...

I get up and out early. Construction work starts at 7:00 so I like to get a few sites under my belt by 9:00. It’s usually quiet during those hours as I’m hustling while people are waking up slowly. There are a few downsides to that. 1). I like to try and finish visiting sites by 2:00 so I have a couple of hours to do office work and write reports. I also don’t have much patience with people who call me after 4:00, but that happens every damn day. I fielded my last call around 6:15 last night. Long day. 2). I have found that my phone goes absolutely insane around 11:00 every day. That hour from 11:00 to 12:00 isn’t a good one. Yesterday I counted the calls and texts I received in that 60-minute window. Five voice calls. Seven texts. A dozen emails. Most of that happened in a 15-minute span, and as the calls were beeping in as I was talking to someone else… …let’s just say that I grew a tad frustrated. Kathy called in the middle of it all. “What?” “Isn’t that a wonderful greeting,” she s...

Heard the classic Seger song this morning - ‘Against the Wind’. Back in the 80’s, Bob came to Buffalo and played the Aud  on back-to-back nights. Mom wouldn’t let me go - said I was too young and Seger had long hair - a lot of my classmates went and it’s hard to say, but I’ve never seen Seger live. Yet it’s about the song. The lyrics are so good. A song about a little longing for the past while also acknowledging that he’s still battling the never-ending wind in his face. As I was thinking about it this morning, I definitely felt a lot of what Bob was thinking about when he wrote the song. Yet, battling the wind has been a metaphorical challenge since the first time someone put pen to paper to write down their thoughts. I also love that Seger included a woman from his past at the start of the song - “Janey was lovely, she was the queen of my nights.” Word on the street is that Janey - who is a real past love - didn’t know she was going to be included. She must’ve fell off her chair...

Our default show is ‘Modern Family’.  If we can’t find something to watch, or if we just have a half an hour, we find the comedy and off we go. “I’m trying to memorize it,” I said, to Jake, when he saw that we had it on. In an episode we were watching on Sunday morning, Claire is trying to fix the broken step, and she wasn’t doing very well. “Why does everything have to suck?” She called out in frustration. I laughed. (That’s the great thing about the show - even after seeing it all plenty of times there are lines that catch us by surprise). We all have those ‘Why does everything suck?” moments in living day to day. We had watched a pretty bad movie on Saturday night, ‘Mother of the Bride’ and all the dialogue was corny. The bride to be and the groom were having a moment. “You are like the sun, the moon, the stars and the sky,” he said. “Good Lord,” Kathy said. “What?” I asked. “I’ve never said that to you?” And we revisited that smaltzy dialogue when Claire yelled her line. “That’...

I’m wiped out. The trip to the Midwest was followed by 3 straight long days and then I played golf on Saturday morning. Made a turkey dinner because the Mom around here loves turkey and following the cleanup of everything I made an announcement. “I can’t stand up anymore.” “What hurts?” Kathy asked. “Everything. I feel like I got hit by a big truck.” And that made me think of my Mom. As we were growing up, six kids and two dogs and Dad all running around… …Mom never stopped working! As siblings we often speak of Dad’s incredible work ethic and as I told Kathy the other day: “Mom out worked Dad.” It wasn’t even close, really. Mom was always doing laundry, cleaning and cooking. She never stopped moving! Mom didn’t miss a school meeting or one of our baseball or basketball games. She laughed at us, and battled for all of us… …every single day. Mother’s Day is a special day around these parts because like my wife and my kids… …we were all blessed with amazing Mommy’s. I think I’m tired? I ...

We’re watching the Netflix show, ‘A Man in Full,” with Jeff Daniels and I mentioned: “What has he ever been in that wasn’t great?” I was thinking of ‘Terms of Endearment’, ‘Network’, ‘American Rust’ and ‘Dumb and Dumber.’ Great in all of them! It got me thinking about where he falls in my list of favorite actors. Bryan Cranston is way up there, and I have listened to him call into sports shows… …seems like a really good dude. There’s DeNiro, of course. Gandolfini was amazingly gifted and impossible to look away from as Tony Soprano. We also have a saying around here: “I’ve never seen a bad Nicholas Cage movie.” You know who else is in the top 10 for me? Woody Harrelson. He was hilarious as Woody Boyd on Cheers all those years ago, and is a tremendous comedic actor, but watch his turn in ‘True Detective’ - outstanding. Through the years, the action stars also did great work - think Sylvester Stallone - almost all the Rocky movies made me feel a lot. Danny DeVito always makes me laugh. S...

Stormy days around here. I saw the same storm in Buffalo as the one that tornadoed me out of bed in Kansas City. Booming thunder and heavy lightning. Everyone likes those sounds when you’re safe inside. At least a little. Speaking of Stormy weather, I heard a little about the trial of the Evangelical’s choice for the second coming when the big orange dude’s porn star case picked up steam. There was steam coming out of the ears of the usually sleeping defendant as the witness spoke of spanking his ass. And usually something like this would be enough to spank a candidate out of the race but there are still people claiming that he ‘tells it like it is!’ even though there are about a million lies a day escaping his pancake-makeuped face. But he looked like he wanted to escape and that his entire world was crumbling as the porn star glibly broke down his payment scheme. It’s all so stupid. “I like his policies!” He he one policy: Make the orange guy rich. Why would someone like that?

I was in Kansas City, and driving around I heard the Springsteen Seeger Sessions song, ‘My Oklahoma Home’ which is terrific, but is about twisters touching down and blowing apart his life. Including his wife, “I bet down to kiss her but she was picked up by a twister. She blowed away.” Cut to Monday Night. I drifted off to sleep and when the sirens sounded I was dreaming about winning 30 grand on a scratch-off lottery ticket- which is something because I don’t buy them. “What the hell is that?” I wondered. The hotel started talking to me. “All hotel guests. Please go to the lower level of the hotel as there is a tornado warning.” I stumbled out of bed, put on a pair of shorts (no one needs to see me looking like Walter White in my tighty-whities). I joined a whole bunch of people heading down 6 flights to the basement, and we all stood, lined up against the wall. No one was talking much. There were a couple of young kids next to me and one who looked to be about 8 said: “It’d be cool t...

 There are senators out there who throw out Bible verses on a regular basis. There are others who are self-proclaimed religious men and they wear it like a badge and use their faith as a weapon. It’s certainly turned me off on all of it. We were watching a Dateline episode the other night and there was a pastor who was being interviewed in the disappearance of a missing woman. He was out on the beach at 2:30 in the morning when he saw the missing woman. “She was walking towards me and I prayed to God and asked Him if I should talk to her. I decided that if she stopped, then God wanted me to speak with her and that perhaps we could have a future.” “Oh for fu**’s sake!” I called out. Kathy laughed. It turned out that the pastor didn’t do anything to the girl, but I wanted him arrested anyway for being so creepy and weird. God must truly be bored if He is up there trying to figure out if the fat, creepy pastor has a chance with the pretty, young girl. That’s what galls me about all of...

It’s bad enough that we have the husky woman dancing as she sings about how she’s controlling her diabetes… …whenever the commercial begins I yell, “Ahhh shit,” and Kathy laughs. Seriously, who sings and dances because their diabetes meds are working? Those aren’t the worst commercials though. We also have a series of commercials that start with: “More than my armpits stink.” And then the moderately attractive woman goes into great detail of what stinks and why. “From my pits to my…” she says, with her voice fading. I finish the sentence for her with a bunch of colorful words. Why? Do we truly need commercials to tell us what stinks on someone? And the toilet paper commercials???? The ones that start with “everyone poops.” We need that? Sometimes I’m eating dinner and we get blasted with the dancing husky chick and then the stinky broads, one after another. What happened to the horses? Or the dancing bears to sell products? I suppose that the advertising execs are sitting around saying...

I went for my physical on Friday. “Where have you been?” The Doctor asked me. I hadn’t visited in a little while, but all was well. Why do I need to see a doctor? Blood work is good. I feel all right most of the time, and visiting a doctor just for the hell of it kind of slips my mind. So, we basically chatted and she asked if I had any complaints. It’s a good thing I went on Friday rather than Saturday after I swung the golf club, mowed the lawn and played ball with Ollie. I woke up feeling tired and sore on Saturday. “Not in summer shape,” I announced, and I did the best I could to stay off my feet for at least a little while during the day. By 8:00 I was ready for bed. That’s the crazy thing about getting older. You don’t feel like any of the things you did in your past should leave you either sore or tired, but here we are. And there’s nothing wrong with relaxing for a few hours. The sun went down, and the sky went black. Modern Family reruns were playing in the background as I rea...

I can name about 20 dogs that have been part of my family through the years. We’ve only had one cat. Miller. It’s a crazy matter as Miller entered our lives when Sam’s friend was kicked out of her apartment and she had to relocate five cats. For a couple of days when I was out of town there were five cats here. Four of them were gone by the time I got home, but I saw a flash of black in Sam’s room. “What the hell is in your room?” “Uh, that’s Miller. He’s a cat. I’m trying to get him a new home, but no one wants him.” “Why did you name him Miller?” I asked. “I thought of Mr. Miller and we had Miller beer.” I laughed. Mr. Miller to Sam is my long-time friend Chris. I couldn’t very well toss ‘Mr. Miller’ out into the streets. Cut to a couple of weeks later, Sam went to visit his cousins in North Carolina. “Um, can you take care of Mr. Miller while I’m gone?” And that was that! Mr. Miller is now my second shadow…along with his best buddy Ollie. He is in the middle of all my routines, and ...

I started working when I was about 12 years old. My brother, John, and I worked on a farm. I went from there to a grocery store, and then at the ripe old age of 18, I stepped into construction. I’ve pretty much been there for more than 40 years and since college I have never once been unemployed. I’ve been at the same company for the last 20 years, but a couple of years back, we were sold, and while it was supposed to be a grand move for all involved… …there have been a great many transitions. I’m almost 60. Things get funky for veteran employees. Like baseball free agents who hit free agency at the age of 35 or so… …the future is a little shaky. When people are setting their ten year plans, older bastards are sometimes transitioned. There is change afoot and I have zero reason to be concerned, but when you get up and battle for a place every single day and you suddenly feel that you’re being slighted or cast aside… …well, it’s weird. And anyone who knows me knows one thing is true: I’...

As we golfed on Sunday the conversation swung to our aches and pains. We are all pushing 60 so, of course, we all had something to say. Then we chatted about our parents. Most of the crew didn’t have their parents still around, but they asked about my Mom. “She’s healthy and happy,” I said, “Her memory is slipping though and that’s hard to take.” “Isn’t it something?” My buddy asked. “We work hard, put up with all kinds of garbage, all for the privilege of back pain and eventually forgetting every freaking thing.” I laughed. “Like my Grandpa used to say, ‘ Life is just a shit sandwich.’” That brought a laugh as well, but I’ve spent the first part of the week thinking about that conversation and how sometimes it does feel a little unfair. But I suppose that there’s something fortunate about living a longer life. Yeah. We’re gonna break down as time marches on and it seems like we’re putting forth a huge effort to try and get through it all. Grandpa used his ‘shit sandwich’ reference a l...