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Tiger, Tiger, Tiger

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I enjoy watching documentaries on sports legends and the famous musicians. I loved the look at Derek Jeter’s life, Jordan’s recap, and especially the look-ins on Billy Joel. Hell, even Charlie Sheen! But one of them that I didn’t enjoy was the one they did on Tiger Woods. “He’s kind of an asshole,” I recall mentioning to Kathy. “Kind of?” She asked. News broke that he had another incident with another vehicle, and it appears, he was impaired as he drove. Which is an asshole move, and at least his second offense. He also had another incident that nearly killed him, and of course, he hit a mailbox running from his wife after she learned about his affairs. When something happens, social media does its thing. Tiger was all over every site on Friday evening, and that brings up all the garbage. “No matter what, people will talk about Tiger’s golf game a hundred years from now,” one genius pointed out. Yeah, he’s a great golfer, or was. He’s destroyed his body, not from playing the game, but ...
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Best Record in the Sport

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Being a Yankees fan comes with great responsibility to irritate the fans of every other team. The Yankees opened the season by pummeling the Giants 7-0 so, of course, for about 15 hours, they were the only team with a 1-0 record. A buddy, and fellow Yankees fan reached out. “You know what you have to do, right?” I posted on Facebook that the Yankees had the best record in baseball. I sent texts to a few idiot Red Sux fans, and if they came back at me with anything to do about not winning a title since 2009, I wrote the argument winning number: 27 That infuriates every fan base. “How many have you seen?” They’ll ask me. “Seven. More than any other team in the last 50 years.” There will be more aggravation coming for all who don’t care for the 27-Time World Champion, Greatest Franchise in the History of Organized American Sports. The best is when I get a Yankees hater and a Bills fan all rolled into one. “Don’t you own a shirt that says, ‘One before I die’?” I can’t help being an arrogan...
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Classified Documents

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Well, this is going to shock a lot of people, but a report came out yesterday that Jack Smith compiled. Classified documents were definitely stolen, and shared with people aboard an airplane, and were sold to enrich one fat orange pedophile. Hard to believe, right? I mean, after all, he was a madman about Hilary Clinton using her email at home. “Lock her up!” Was the big rallying cry, as he and his cult members lectured us about right and wrong. He loaded classified documents by the truck load and stored them in a bathroom at Mar-a-Lardo. It’s enough to put a normal person in jail, for the rest of his life, but everyone forgot about it. Because there’s a new crime every day! For those not quite getting it: He stole classified documents and sold them and kept the money. A one word description would be: Treason. The Epstein documents have been put on the back burner because of the war that we already won, but hasn’t ended. Oh yeah, what else? The country is now insolvent. Another word fo...
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Opening Day!

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It’s early for baseball season, and a little hard to get too worked up because it was 23 degrees yesterday morning. Not to mention that the Yankees are opening up on the west coast, and opening day is actually, opening night. But make no mistake: Life is better when they’re playing baseball, and I can open up the box scores shortly after opening my eyes. The Yankees won 94 games last year. They have finished with a winning record every season since 1993. That’s a lot of winning, and while the hedge fund dodgers are making a mockery of the payroll system, the Blue Jays showed the world last year that they can be beat. Toronto should have won that 7th game. On to this year. In the National League, the division winners will be: Phillies, Cubs and Hedge Fund. The wild card teams will be Atlanta, San Diego and the Mets. I think the Phillies make it to the World Series where they  will face, and lose to the American League entrant. Yeah. Take a wild guess where I’m going with this: Divis...
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They Laughed At Him

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Over the weekend, the pig backed himself into a corner with his tweets. There was a long tweet that threatened Iran, saying it would be a bombing that would be so awesome, like nothing that’s ever happened. The tweet threatened war crimes and came with a 48-hour deadline. Iran answered immediately saying that they didn’t need to think about it. Bombs away! The world waited in the balance and everyone was concerned because escalating the war would destroy the markets further and send gas prices to $6.00 a gallon. But Pedo Pig had a major problem because if he backed off he was going to be seen as chickening out again. If he bombed civilians he was going to be arrested as a war criminal. What to do? What to do? He did what he does best, of course. He lied! Told the world, in time for the markets to adjust, that the United States and Iran had embarked on very productive, unbelievably amazing peace talks.  The greatest talks of all time. An hour later, Iran popped the balloon  The...
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The Odd Couple

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Pluto television has all the old shows. More trouble for Kathy as she walks by asking: “What in the hell are you watching?” Now, The Odd Couple is a legendary show for a few reasons: 1). I remember watching the show with my Mom. For some reason, it always seemed as though we were the two watching the show, and man, that’s a cherished memory. Mom would always remark about what an absolute pain in the ass Felix was. 2). I wanted to be a sportswriter because of Oscar. For the longest time, as a kid, when someone asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, ‘sportswriter’ was the answer. 3). My first newspaper interview as an author brought up my Oscar Madison quote. I told the reporter: “I wanted to be Oscar Madison. I wanted to dress like a slob, eat like a pig, and write things people want to read. I’ve done 2 out of 3 and my writing career is picking up steam.” The Buffalo News ran that quote under my picture. 4). The show stands up! I watched the episode with Deacon Jones where they m...
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So Stupid

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Speaking to Japan’s prime minister who asked about why she had to be surprised about the start of the Iran war, the fat pedophile said: “You didn’t tell me about Pearl Harbor.” Robert Mueller, a man who served the county through a number of administrations died on Saturday. “I’m glad he’s dead.” The orange pig said. We have zero clue about why the war was started. To save the good people of Iran who were killed for protesting? Saving them by dropping bombs on their children is a curious way to show love. “They were two weeks away from starting a nuclear war,” the obese idiot mentioned. That’s a lie. Gas prices are through the roof.  401 k’s are in the basement. Stock market has lost a trillion. All the money DOGE was going to save? Yeah. No. The deficit is climbing. “The war is over. We can leave anytime because they’re decimated,” President Shitsinhispants mentioned. As they talked about needing $200 billion more, and sending more than 2,000 troops into harm’s way. And did you see...
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