Thoughts of a Common Man

WEEI sports host Alex Reimer is suspended. He’s a sports host in Boston and the other day he called Tom Brady’s 5-year-old daughter, an annoying little pissant. Lo and behold, Tom was due to call in for an interview before leaving for Minneapolis for his 8th Super Bowl appearance. Careers aside, Brady had to be livid. He very calmly put an end to the interview and referencing the remark about his kid, let the hosts know that he may not appear on the show again. One time, long ago, we were at a restaurant and a guy who was dining by himself told my children to “shut their mouths.” I have never, in my life, been angrier. I took a bit of the high road when I asked the man to just finish his meal and not talk to my boys (who were all 5 or less at the time). “Someone has to discipline them,” the guy said. I took less of the high road after that. “You say one more word and I’m going to smash your face into your lasagna.” The waitress stopped by before I could get up, or...

I had a plan for the day. (I always have a plan for the day). My day is usually all laid out in my mind, and most days I get pretty close. Monday of the week is usually important too because that’s when my legs fee the best, so I like to cover some ground. “No Sim Card Installed.” That was the message on my phone. When the SIM card is not installed, nothing works! No texts, no emails, no phone calls. I can’t function! “Reset your network settings,” Jake said, one day when it happened when we were all together. I tried that. “No Sim Card Installed.” Damn! “Turn it on and off,” Sam said. I tried that. Nothing, nada, no way! I was heading down Transit Road. I saw the Verizon store from about a mile away. Signed in and believed that by the time I left I’d be about $800 in the hole. You can’t walk into that joint without getting a new phone and a contract. “It’s either just that your SIM card is shot, or your phone is cooked. No charge to replace the SIM card...

A bunch of people were busted for having bought Twitter followers. Why? It’s all about clicks and retweets and how many friends you have. What does that do for you?? It’s not like that you’re getting a nickel for every friend you have, right? Some days a lot of people read this blog... ...other days people don’t. I don’t care, and that doesn’t make me a dope. I shouldn’t care! No one should!! Have you ever had a conversation with anyone about how many people liked their tweet about their night out in Vegas. I do share things on social media, so I’m trying not to be a hypocrite here. I like to make people laugh. I try to put out words about the book (although I’m really not comfortable with self-promotion), it’s fun to tell a story... ...but if I found out that I had zero followers... ...I’d still do it. Justin Bieber is the league leader, right? And the Kardashians and Obama and Trump... ...all way up there in the millions, right? What does that get th...

It appears that we have a massive rift in the presidential marriage. Donald is heading one way and Melania is going the other way. She went to Mar-A-Lago and hung out there until he was going that way on Air Force One... ...by the way, did you see that it is going to cost $24 million to replace the refrigerators on Air Force One? What the hell is a $24 million refrigerator about???? Get a cooler and some bags of ice. $24 million!!!! Anywhoha... ...there appears to be a major storm in the marriage. That's a shame too...didn't they always appear to be really close? And no one really knows what happens inside a marriage. I thought O.J. and Nicole were getting along well. Still, all married couples had the conversation, I assume, just as we all did after Clinton-Lewinsky. "Is sleeping with and then paying off a porn star frowned upon?" I asked my beautiful wife. She just glanced at me. "Even if you didn't find out about it for ten ye...

We found a great show to watch... ...I’m not even sure what format it’s on. (In full disclosure I can barely turn the television on and there is hell to pay if the kids don’t make it so I can hit just one button in the morning). I knew the story of the Unabomber, of course. We were all gripped in that fear, but the show is expertly done... ...and I’m finding myself trapped in the idea that Ted Kacinsky became the man that he became. He was Harvard-educated...he began his academic career at 16... ...An IQ of 168. A mathematician who wrote a thesis that only a handful of the world’s most perfect minds could understand. Diseased by isolation. How do you go from brilliant to diseased? And, of course, he lived a life that was devoid of real love, and that will do it. We need to feel things. We need a little of the human touch. We need to take the dogs for a ride, laugh with a friend, relax. My beautiful wife often tells the story that had she not saved me I would’ve woun...

Far be it of me to cast the first stone, but Tuesday night Evangelical leader, Tony Perkins, was making the rounds on the news shows to say that Trump received a mulligan for his affair with the porn star. Now, I may have missed that part of the religious instruction when I was in Catholic grammar school or attending a private college all based on Christian values. Are these people for real???? They jam their conservative judgemental garbage down people’s throats, not even pretending, to recognize the distinction between church and state, but when they get a chance to preach about a lost soul, they barf up forgiveness because: “That was before.” Has anyone heard the big orange guy beg for forgiveness? His preacher in office, Pence, said that “it’s baseless.” Yeah. If you ignore the magazine interview from 6 years ago, or the $130,000 in hush money, or the current “Make America Horny Again” bus tour going on. It really aggravated me! Perkins was tripping all over him...

Two flying stories for your amusement... ...maybe. I went from Des Moines to Chicago on a tiny plane, but was looking forward to the second leg, from Chicago to Boston, because the plane is bigger and I had a window seat. I planned on sleeping. I got to my seat at 28 A and there was a middle-aged woman seated there. “You’re in my seat,” I said. “Here’s the thing,” she said. “My husband is here, and he’s very ill. Do you mind switching with me?” The old guy looked a little green. “I’m in 28 E,” she said. “A middle seat?” I asked. “Yeah, Sorry,” She crinkled her nose. It was a middle seat between two guys who looked a little like John Candy. What do you do???? She was begging me with her eyes. I nestled in between the two huge guys...there was about 1,100 pounds in row 28. Needless to say, sleep wasn’t coming. But I survived. Why did the nuns make me nice? Then, on the way out of Boston (Home of the AFC Champion Patriots), I was in line to go through sec...