Thoughts of a Common Man

We were watching Game 7 of the World Series. Sam was rooting for the Rangers and I sort of wanted the Cardinals because I like Lance Berkman. Either way, it didn't really matter to either of us because the 27-Time World Champion Yankees weren't involved. Oh well, free agency starts this week. During the 7th inning stretch Joe Buck-up announced that a grammy winner was going to lead the tribute song to America. Buck-up introduced singer David Nail. Never heard of the guy. David Nail? I turned to Sam and said, in an angry tone, "David NAIL? What was Bobby Screw busy?" Sort of a dumb, throw-away line that my brother John is really good at. Puns that make you laugh because they are really dumb. Except Sam couldn't stop laughing. He got caught in a giggle that went on until the game was over. He would look at me and just say, "Bobby Screw, Bobby Screw, Bobby Screw." The sound of his laughter took me way back...I was probably Sam's age. I was seated beside...

I do enjoy my birthday for a couple of real tangible reasons. First off, my great sister, Corinne, never forgets and she always gets a present that matches my personality. Two Italian salamis this year. They're almost gone. Secondly, my mother always gets me a gift card. For a book store. I guess she knows me well too. Like Mom, I am not great at sharing books. I want to buy them (to help the author who worked his ass off) and I want to keep them in my room when I'm done reading them. So, what did I get this year with my gift card? 13 Reasons Why by Jay Asher. Loose Girl (I liked the title) by Kerry Cohen. Bad Blood by John Sandford (I read everything he writes). South of Broad by Pat Conroy (with a nod to my buddy Jan for turning me in that direction). Cruel Death by M. William Phelps (I met him in Rhode Island at a Book Awards Show...we had a couple of beers...great writer). Moneyball by Michael Lewis (Baseball...can't get enough) and The Winner Stands Alone by Pablo ...

Since I did the top ten sitcoms of all-time, even though I left Friends off the list...which was great, actually...here are the worst. 10). Joey -Speaking of Friends. I wanted to like it. I really did. It was awful. 9). Bewitched. Larry Tate was great, but when they switched the Darrin's I got all mixed-up and they didn't even address it. Like we were supposed to believe they were the same guy. 8). Designing Women. Who the hell cared? 7). Gilligan's Island - Sorry. It sucked. Tell me that those guys wouldn't have tried to bang Ginger and Mary Ann, and/or smothered Lovey in her sleep. 6). The Brady Bunch - It sucked too. Sorry. Alice getting laid? Hard to believe. And the Dad was gay. Can't watch the show, listen to him dole out advice, and not think of the fact that he was gay. Or that Florence Henderson banged Greg or that Greg did Marsha. Too freaking crazy for me. 5). Tyler Perry anything - always seems to be on TBS. Always seem to be yelling. Tried it a couple o...

Man, the protests are growing. What is going on in this country? A lot of unrest, for sure. Let me try and figure out what I think. Tuition is going up. Fuel costs are through the roof. Food prices are high. Entertainment prices are higher than ever. Medical costs are a freaking joke. Those that have jobs have not been handed cost of living increases. Wages have been stagnant for 30 years. Debt is through the ceiling. We are fighting with everyone, still, right? Do I have it down? So, why are they protesting? The battle seems to be that none of them truly know. Let me tell you a story. I was teaching a class this week. One of the people arrived for class twenty minutes late. I decided to excuse the fact that he was tardy and told him to sign in and grab the handouts. He needed the class to keep his job. He screwed up what he was supposed to do. With 30 people looking on, I repeated my instructions. He got the proper paperwork, went to his seat, took out his cell phone, dialed, and bega...

I love sitcoms. I would watch them over any other thing on television other than a sporting event. They certainly are better than reality television. I was catching an episode of Seinfeld in the hotel room tonight when it sort of dawned on me that I need to talk about my favorite all-time sitcoms. What's yours? It seems that years ago there were a lot more to choose from. I remember Thursday nights on NBC in particular. Wings, Frazier, Cheers. It was can't miss television. So, how do I rank them? Let's go backwards from ten: 10). M*A*S*H - I loved that show, but when I heard a comic say that it lasted longer than the Korean war, it kind of bugged me. Loved the final episode though. Watched it in the college dorm freshman year. 9). King of Queens - laughed hard every time she got on him about his weight. She was a tad nasty though. 8). Everybody Loves Raymond - loved the finale of this one too. A lot of yelling, but Robert and Frank made the show. 7). Modern Family - This on...

The events of Monday led me to the conclusion that I should definitely draw some conclusions. Every day in this great land people live their last day. That is certainly a scary proposition. I never truly feared death until I was looking down its muzzle. Now I think of it all the time and it sort of drives me nuts. I wish I could wrap everyone up in bubble wrap and keep them happy and secure. No accidents. No illness. No sadness or disease. Not possible, right? In an instant everything you hold dear can be ripped away. And there's the voice in my head, the one that was honed by my family and friends and the nuns that beat me all the way through grammar school. "Trust in God." "Stay positive." That little voice brings instant aggravation. Yet when I wrote Oh Brother! it was Jeff's spirit that I was trying to get to. The 'have-a-good-time-even-if-you're-walking-into-an-empty-room-all-by-yourself' feeling. It's ironic to think that his passing to...

Why bother? Decided to take a mental health break. A day off of work on Monday in order to gear up for a real long rest of the week. "What do you have planned?" my beautiful wife asked. "Not a single thing after my doctor's appointment." And I was fairly excited about no plans until precisely 6:30 a.m. when my brother-in-law Chuck texted me about an accident in the old hometown. What were the chances it could be someone I know and love? Pretty damn good, actually. My buddy Pops...banged up for sure. I did have a doctor's appointment for my knee so before checking in on Pops at the hospital I saw the doc. "We have to go back in." Perfect. Two for two. It's scheduled for next Thursday. I decided to spend a little time with the wife. Sam came home early from school with an upset stomach. All right. Stop for a slice of pizza. "Slices are going to be about ten minutes." I waited. Days like this. In an instant. No control over anything. But...